[NF] INFP care the most about themselves ?

[TheEmeraldCanopy]

I like how for the most part only INFP's are answering this thread.


Do INFPs care the most about themselves? The answer I would say is yes, in that we are very aware of ourselves and how subjects relate back to us by nature. This doesn't mean we can't care for others.

 

[Synapse]

As has been stated the primary reason for most individuals is first to cater to their self needs and then what interests them after will be picked up when it coincides with their personal issues, emotions and thoughts like a radio signal.

That's life, society tends to talk over each other without listening. Its like a bubble wrap, in one ear out the other, each person irrespective of type filters their needs accordingly, you do too Entropie.

If people listened to each other, really listened without switching off or tuning out then a lot less problems would plague people, but then that's why there is typology, the balance to know when to listen and when not to listen is necessary too.

 

[the state i am in]

feeling relates experiences and objects to the idea of the self. routes things thru the lens of the self. understands how it fits in/together.

Fe does it externally in the world, in a real and practical and actual be here now kind of way. it tries to interact, push, create, shape, manipulate, engineer, express, articulate, etc.

Fi does it internally. in a let me dwell on it for a while and use my deeply collected pools of expertise, knowledge, and past experience that i have stored and categorized the hell out of. i've spent a lot of time understanding what is right, so let me figure out how some ideas for you, etc

it depends on the type how these things angle along. Fi Ne shoots out lots of ideas (based on understandings of how this situation relates to the person's own subjective understandings, relationships with self, feelings of affirmation and denial ie judgments, etc) that others can use. Ni Fe locates a complex mish mash of contextual clues in its own giant Idea-Maker, the one Big Idea big picture blah blah, when it finds the specific place/position/perspective, finds the marker and highlights its bottom line, synthesizes the information and scans in all of the resolution (detail, data, etc), zooms in deeply to its particular latitude/longitude on the One Single Giant Idea it has (about the world and everyone in it), it finds a way to express it in an emotionally tailored, symbolized, meaningful way (the right voice for the job).

both fail miserably at times.

Fi has to work its way outward, Fe has to work its way inward. and the way that happens depends on the other functions. connecting feeling to expression/extroversion, connecting feeling to the development of a voice, a vocalization of desires, agendas, missions, interactions, communications, etc, especially one that is well-researched, intelligent, and cognitively sound, takes a while to get down pat.

 

[Southern Kross]

I agree that more context is needed so I can't be sure of your friend's meaning but can I provide a different perspective?

I took it to mean that INFPs can only accept another's argument if it doesn't contradict our own inherent views. For example: If someone pays me a compliment I have trouble accepting it. My standards that I set for myself are the only ones that truly matter to me. Compliments can be nice but I can't be convinced that something I did was great unless I feel it myself, and that's not often. I have a tendency to be self-critical and nothing anyone can say can change my mind.

I can't be certain if this was what was meant but hey...

 

[entropie]

I forgot what my thoughts were, when creating the thread, but I remember the feeling which motivated it.

The thing is: I dont get the guy and whatever he does it appears highly selfish. I am sure though that, if you count the facts, I am the more selfish one of us two and he only sucks at words.

Sometimes he says things, you want to hit him for right where he stands; he is my friend and therefore I am used to it + I can take a lot, the only problem is, outstanding people see things differently.

You take the guy for example to a social gathering, where everyone is sitting around a table, talking to each other totally superficial and the whole thing is pretty boring. He aswell as I am pissed, is by the convo. I will wait, until people are more drunk and then burn the house. He on the other hand starts from hour zero to talk about things you dont say in public, ending his sentences with things "... and then I am gonna kill myself" or "then I am gonna kill all of you". He intends it to be fun, but he sucks at being fun.

Most of the time it ends with everyone thinking he is a freak just before I even had my great time in showing everyone that I am a freak too, while being heavily impaired.

I was thinking about that, cause he is a very lonely person and I dont know if he does care about it or not. He is hanging around with me alot lately and wants to motivate me to go to places on weekends, where you usually meet girls. Thats why I thought he maybe feels alone and I wanted to improve his mannerisms a bit.

I havent talked with him about that though yet and I havent done anything behind is back and I wont. I wanted to talk to you about that freak problem and your ideas to approach it.

So basically this thread has advanced. In the first place I thought he was only selfish, but I think I start to understand that this problem is more of a general nature as in etiquette for moving in society. So that he appears selfish from times to times, could be maybe him blocking emotionally to people trieing to approach him and is in the whole concept just one integral part of his general inability to "not leave behind a bad first impression" with people.

 

[Udog]

I don't know what it is about INFPs that cause us to say such socially taboo things and then try to pass it off as humor.