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[NF] Emotional Challenges

proteanmix

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Some people like intellectual challenges and others like to test their physical abilities.

Do any NFs look for or put themselves into situations that will stretch their emotional boundaries? This could be personally or interpersonally. This doesn't exclusively mean dealing with difficult people (although it can) or putting yourself in an unhealthy or destructive place, but rather testing yourself and your emotional limitations. Basically, when others may quit and throw in the towel, do you soldier on not because of another person, but because you want to know if you'll survive?

Yeah, I can't think of any examples so feel free to give me some.
 

cafe

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Oh God, please no! I'd rather take a beating.

I want to solve emotional/interpersonal stuff so that it gets all peaceful and I can feel happy contented feelings, not all the unpleasant, scary ones.

I have no doubt in my mind that I am strong and can get through all manner of crap. I don't need anymore proof. Bring on the peace and love.
 

nightning

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Yuck! Why would you deliberately stress yourself out by creating/stepping into an overly emotional environment? It doesn't seem like something a sane NF will do... at least not introverted NFs anyways, I'm not certain about extroverts. I am willing to explore different boundaries of emotions, but those are mostly self-enquiries. Actually now that I think about it perhaps it is the difference between I/E. Introverts prefer to explore emotions from within while extroverts like experiencing it from other people?
 

Alienclock

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Never really thought about. Life itself is sort of a challenge... sounds like an interesting idea...
 

targobelle

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I don't think we seek it out on a conscious level, yet I think somehow it just finds us.
 

proteanmix

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I'm not saying stress yourself out, who wants to deal with that?! I'm saying knowing your limits. Take grief counselors for example. Why do they do it? Psychiatrists/psychologists deal with people all the time, and most of them have some sort of problem they need solved.

Their are occupations that deal with this issue all the time, but on an individual level people are thinking it's nothing but stress?
 

Totenkindly

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That's funny. I'm not NF, but I find psychiatry fascinating, because I'm less focused on my feelings there and more focused on understanding and resolving the issue.

Also, those emotions are not being directed at ME specifically, I'm essentially a "third party" -- so I can discount them pretty easily.

So it's an opportunity to not just help someone find their way / nurture them, but also a chance to explore and understand and see the bigger picture of human beings and how they work.
 

cafe

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I'm not saying stress yourself out, who wants to deal with that?! I'm saying knowing your limits. Take grief counselors for example. Why do they do it? Psychiatrists/psychologists deal with people all the time, and most of them have some sort of problem they need solved.

Their are occupations that deal with this issue all the time, but on an individual level people are thinking it's nothing but stress?
Wouldn't that be more about caring about other people enough that you put your on comfort aside in order to try to help?

I don't consider that something I'd do as a challenge to my own emotional resilience. My confidence in my resilience might be what I would trust to get me through. Is that what you're talking about?

Edit: And untying inter- and intra-personal knots does involve a level of empathy, but to me, it is also an intellectual exercise.
 

Alienclock

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I'm not saying stress yourself out, who wants to deal with that?! I'm saying knowing your limits. Take grief counselors for example. Why do they do it? Psychiatrists/psychologists deal with people all the time, and most of them have some sort of problem they need solved.

Their are occupations that deal with this issue all the time, but on an individual level people are thinking it's nothing but stress?

Stress may be part of it... But then there is good stress and bad stress.
I am always pushing my limits in a sense. Looking for understanding, asking myself questions, challenging myself to remain fair and open minded.

I don't like to take my emotions at face value. I need to know why I feel something... Life has had many emotional challenges...

Have you ever specifically searched for an emotional challenge? Are you thinking of doing so?

ps. are you aware that your baby is smoking? ;)
 

proteanmix

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Stress may be part of it... But then there is good stress and bad stress.
I am always pushing my limits in a sense. Looking for understanding, asking myself questions, challenging myself to remain fair and open minded.

I don't like to take my emotions at face value. I need to know why I feel something... Life has had many emotional challenges...

Have you ever specifically searched for an emotional challenge? Are you thinking of doing so?

ps. are you aware that your baby is smoking? ;)

No I'm not actually, I was just wondering if taking on the hardest professor in you college, or climbing Mount Everest is the same thing as willingly accepting a mentally ill patient.
 

proteanmix

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Wouldn't that be more about caring about other people enough that you put your on comfort aside in order to try to help?

I don't consider that something I'd do as a challenge to my own emotional resilience. My confidence in my resilience might be what I would trust to get me through. Is that what you're talking about?

Edit: And untying inter- and intra-personal knots does involve a level of empathy, but to me, it is also an intellectual exercise.

Yes exactly. You're confident in your ability to handle it so you willingly take it on. There has to be somebody in the world willing to this, right?
 

nightning

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No I'm not actually, I was just wondering if taking on the hardest professor in you college, or climbing Mount Everest is the same thing as willingly accepting a mentally ill patient.

Not the same thing... the former two is about challenging yourself... the latter is more about assisting a person in need. That you will tolerate some pain because in the end, the patient will benefit from it.
 

cafe

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Yes exactly. You're confident in your ability to handle it so you willingly take it on. There has to be somebody in the world willing to this, right?
Yeah, but it is a dirty job. I'd rather there was no need for such things in the first place. I don't generally seek it out, but sometimes I just seem to be the last one that hasn't run away or flipped out. LOL, that's why, when I don't hear from my friends in awhile, I assume that their lives are going well and no news is good news.
 

Alienclock

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No I'm not actually, I was just wondering if taking on the hardest professor in you college, or climbing Mount Everest is the same thing as willingly accepting a mentally ill patient.

in my opinion, heck yeah!
 

Siúil a Rúin

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Some people like intellectual challenges and others like to test their physical abilities.

Do any NFs look for or put themselves into situations that will stretch their emotional boundaries? This could be personally or interpersonally. This doesn't exclusively mean dealing with difficult people (although it can) or putting yourself in an unhealthy or destructive place, but rather testing yourself and your emotional limitations. Basically, when others may quit and throw in the towel, do you soldier on not because of another person, but because you want to know if you'll survive?
I'm only half NF, mostly likely an NT with a strong F. I avoid emotionally destructive environments when it serves no purpose. There is a fine line between what you may be calling an emotional challenge and an intellectual challenge. From the time I was 13, I have always been available to most anyone who is looking for someone to talk to. For that reason I got to know many of the social outcasts in whatever environment I was in. I do this because they are interesting and generally have qualities that others overlook. I do genuinely care about people, but would have to describe my interest in people as primarily intellectual. When someone displays a behavior that places them at odds with the group, they have reasoning that makes that behavior acceptable in their minds. It completely fascinates me to be able to discover that process. Being able to view any given social scenario from profoundly different viewpoints provides a kind of insight that self-invested reasoning cannot offer. My interest in outcasts has placed me in a confusing role in many social settings because I have personally been easy enough to get along with and have abilities, autonomy, and a backbone that people respect, but I don't follow the expected behavior of accepting and rejecting the 'right' people. I don't think that is because I am testing emotional boundaries, but more because I really don't care what people think about me, especially when they are narrow minded and involved in group think. I do really care what the people I respect and admire think of me, though. It does amuse me to confuse and challenge the status quo in a pleasant and reasonable manner.

Accepting an extremely mentally ill patient is an intellectual challenge, not an emotional one. It is a problem solving task, not one of personal involvement.
 

faith

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I don't search out emotional challenges. But at regular intervals there will come some kind of emotional challenge in my life. I usually have the choice to bail or to hang in there and see it through. I used to bail more than I do now. Now I choose to hang in there because I don't want to be the sort of person who bails. I choose to see it through because I don't like wimps. Maybe that's intentionally accepting a challenge rather than searching out a challenge.

But, as has been said, I don't accept the challenge merely for the sake of the challenge. It's always because I see something valuable could be gained and I don't want to lose it because I'm afraid to stick it out.
 

Crabapple

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I would say I often have emotional challenges, but not because i seek them. They simply find me. I view them as opportunities for growth. Even if I don't initially welcome them.
 

jnpl0011

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I tend to think that emotional challenges are categorically different from intellectual and physical challenges, so it would make sense that most would not seek out these types of challenges for themselves. If you think about it, intellectual and physical challenges, at least for me, are fun and desired because the process is fun and emotionally invigorating. If one were to test the limits of his emotional integrity, certainly the process involved with that is not very fun. Such a process would be potentially painful and/or stressful, especially if there is no other object besides just trying to test your own emotional "togetherness".
 

niffer

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Some people like intellectual challenges and others like to test their physical abilities.

Do any NFs look for or put themselves into situations that will stretch their emotional boundaries? This could be personally or interpersonally. This doesn't exclusively mean dealing with difficult people (although it can) or putting yourself in an unhealthy or destructive place, but rather testing yourself and your emotional limitations. Basically, when others may quit and throw in the towel, do you soldier on not because of another person, but because you want to know if you'll survive?

Yeah, I can't think of any examples so feel free to give me some.

that part seems more T than F to me
 

Littlelostnf

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That's funny. I'm not NF, but I find psychiatry fascinating, because I'm less focused on my feelings there and more focused on understanding and resolving the issue.

Also, those emotions are not being directed at ME specifically, I'm essentially a "third party" -- so I can discount them pretty easily.

So it's an opportunity to not just help someone find their way / nurture them, but also a chance to explore and understand and see the bigger picture of human beings and how they work.


I too am interested in psychiatry...but unlike Fortunato I am NF and I know because of the F issue it would be harder for me. While I am a third party I'd be more likely to pick up those emotions more quickly and they would have a tendency to stress me out more quickly I think. As for teh opportunity to help/nurture somene and understand even more about human beings and how they work. (cause I'm pretty accurate for the most part right now...sorta why I have to disconnect from time to time...can be overwhelming)
 
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