[INFP] The INFP shadow

[speculative]

Imagine an INFP...

This is a very good description of it I would say. However, the order of our functions makes it seem like we are "designed" for gloom and doom...

 

[CrystalViolet]

But haven't you guys noticed when the chips are really down, that's when we are absolutely brillant. You know that bit where we've gone through all the gloom and doom,and there's nothing really to lose any more, and every one else has completely given up.
?Maybe that's just me. I'm good at that. Very good at salvaging sinking ships.

Isn't the INFP shadow ESTJ? I once did a MBTI test in work mode, and I tested ISTJ, and think that their four main functions are the exact reverse of INFP. The things I do for fun sometimes, LOL.
Anyhoo, I'm like a scary ISTJ, not a nice one, but it shows up in how obsessive I get in arranging my work space among other things, the great "battle" commander I can be etc.
Sometimes though, I wish I could take home that excessive tidiness....because I'm very P at home.
It would be good if they weren't so discordant in my life

 

[r0wo1]

Isn't the INFP shadow ESTJ?

I believe so, I've read it more than once, and I have definetely seen it. When I'm in a group that is working towards a common goal (albeit typically only one that I really care about ie making a film etc) I definitely see myself slip over to my ESTJ shadow. But I'm a nice one!... typically...

 

[Jeremy]

I believe so, I've read it more than once, and I have definetely seen it. When I'm in a group that is working towards a common goal (albeit typically only one that I really care about ie making a film etc) I definitely see myself slip over to my ESTJ shadow. But I'm a nice one!... typically...

The ESTJ is actually the exact same as an INFP, only in reverse order. According to the theory, the INFP's true "shadow" is the ENFJ. I'd wager that your 4th function also becomes used a lot more heavily when you're acting in your shadow mode as well, though.

 

[PeaceBaby]

...I've had to learn how to be assertive..

Agreed; this is very important.

A lot of what I think of in myself as "the uglies" is just normal human reaction. It's a distortion of my values system that makes them seem ugly to me.

Hit the nail on the head with that. To others, feeling annoyed, therefore being annoyed, is normal. To me it feels ... uncomfortable.

 

[Anja]

Agreed; this is very important.



Hit the nail on the head with that. To others, feeling annoyed, therefore being annoyed, is normal. To me it feels ... uncomfortable.

Me too. That's an unreasonable rule I picked up somewhere along the way. Don't know where. Probably those messages we get when we're kids.

Stop that crying!
Don't yell!
Like that.

Plus all the cultural messages that we get that being angry isn't okay. Put that together with a strong need to feel a sense of connection with others and you get fear of abandonment. Angry= being abandoned?

I know that for me, because of circumstances of my childhood and my need to have harmony in my life, abandonment issues were problematic for a long time.

Hide The Shadow! Someone might leave you if they see it!

 

[CrystalViolet]

Hmmm....apparently I'm the master of suppressing emotions until stressed (not that I've noticed mind you).