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[INFP] NFs and pride, conflict, attitude?

niffer

New member
Joined
Apr 26, 2007
Messages
1,217
MBTI Type
ENfP
Enneagram
8w9
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Perhaps they are afraid of change, and are more comfortable with the ignorance and the evil, because this is what shelters them from it. Religion? I wouldn't know...
 

heart

heart on fire
Joined
May 19, 2007
Messages
8,456
Perhaps they are afraid of change, and are more comfortable with the ignorance and the evil, because this is what shelters them from it. Religion? I wouldn't know...

Yeah, I don't know either :doh:, but I burn to know! :D

No person can totally shield themsleves against change, the universe is change, so this would not be a logical or valid reason for them to be accepting ignorance.

Can't put it totally off on religion either. The holy books like the Christian Bible are full of warnings about things like this. If they really read their works fully and meditated on them, it seems they could not escape the teachings to face the world as it is.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Ephesians 6:12
 

Cerpin_Taxt

New member
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
132
MBTI Type
INTP
It is not ingnorance. We don't live in a soceity where anyone with normal mental ability can be truly ignorant unless it be by choice. I never let people off the hook with this ignorance business. Oh, if only all the ignorant people were educated, then all would be right and good. BAH!

People chose ignorance because it is more comfortable for them (momentarily)to not face the shadows in the world, they are running from the truth of the world and no amount of education could educate them in that case. ;)

People follow the easier, lazier path and then hurt later for it. My question remains, why are they so willing to chose momentary escape from a painful truth and risk greater pain later? Do they enjoy the pain? Are they masochistic? I sometimes really think they might be!

I agree that people have a choice as to whether or not they're informed; however, I think the choice isn't necessarily conscious, and is certainly influenced by culture, and there does seem to be a large -- albeit passive -- anti-intellectualism movement in some realms of society.

Although I agree that that isnt any excuse in this day and age, were all the information is at our fingertips -- more or less.

In regards to the OP, I think that the misconception of INFP's be passive or pushovers, arises from their -- in my experience -- very reserved demeanor, of course under they have alooooooot of depth, but INFP's seem to be selective on who they share that depth with, and most people only get to see that reserved side.

I think INTP's have a similar problem, but the misconceptions surronding us generally involve coldness, arrogance, insensitivity etc...man being an Introvert -- particularly an INXX -- can be a pain in the ass.
 

Kastor

New member
Joined
Jul 23, 2007
Messages
228
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
The descriptions I read of my type seem to paint the picture of a softspoken, sugary sweet individual who would be the perfect first grade teacher. That is probably the one INFPism I am having a hard time claiming.

I like helping other people...sometimes, but I'm not anymore generous than the next person. In fact I often feel exasperated by other people! If I take issue with someone, I don't hide it. I mean, I don't come right out with my dislike of someone, but my behavior towards them makes it pretty darn obvious I think.

I am pretty straightforward when I'm comfortable, and it typically doesn't take me long to get comfortable. I think I've got a lot of that "I am woman, hear me roar" sass to my personality, although to any stranger I come across I am polite and relatively softspoken. But if you spend longer than 10 minutes with me you'll find out pretty fast that I'm not so vanilla.

I have unusually strong, liberal opinions, which I have learned to keep to myself in my conservative, hell fire and brimstone community. But if I feel you can handle how passionately I discuss certain topics, I'll go for it with no hesitation.

NFs, what do you think? Particularly you introverts like me?
You sound ALOT like me, actually o.o
Us INFPs deffinately have a dark side.
 

JivinJeffJones

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
3,702
MBTI Type
INFP
(How dark are you, JJJ?)

No darker than the next person. And the next person. And the next...and so on.

Seriously though, I always liked the idea of darkness (while at the same time hating it), but when it came to doing dark things to other people I couldn't handle it. I guess I've always been a bit of a crypto-goth. I could never be an actual goth because I think they're more than a little ridiculous. Plus the whole "externalizing the internal via fashion" is not something I'm into as an INFP.
 

Meursault

New member
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
44
The ideal INFP described in the archetypes always reminded me of Jane, the perfectly sweet older sister from Pride and Predjudice, with whom I have nothing in common-- have always felt and acted like more Lizzy.

I don't know if this will help but, I can't help but think that if NFs were sorted by the Sorting Hat, we would almost certainly be sorted into Gryffindor, yet the ideal of the INFP as based on the official discriptions sounds more like a Hufflepuff to me, which might better describe ISFPs or ISFJs--I think INFPs are just reserved Gryffindors. I'm no Hufflepuff that's for sure.

I don't think we really are conflict avoidant per se, I think we just avoid needless/pointless conflict (as defined by each of us individually), becuase it takes alot out of us (or at least it does me); we may seem to want peace at all costs, but I don't think this is true (for instance, I am not going to upset myself arguing with someone when I know they will never accept my point of view--unless, it involves an opinion they have asserted to someone else about me which is false--for example, over the weekend one of my professors led another professor to believe I was lying about a particular incident between the first professor and myself. I don't believe the 2nd professor will take my word over that of his friend and colleague, but my integrity means too much for me not to have confronted both on this matter, which has now sparked off a full-scale war in the department...sigh...but I won't back down :p).

the whole "externalizing the internal via fashion" is not something I'm into as an INFP.

I did when I was younger, and still do to some extent though in a different ways. I have never been able to divorce the physical me, from the internal me; doing so always felt false--in high school I wasn't really punk or goth--I was little of both and lot of neither--I looked like Edie Sedgwick, except that the tips of my hair were blue (like her, I was more apt to wear ballet slippers than combat boots).
 

Siúil a Rúin

when the colors fade
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
14,037
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
496
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
The INFPs primary function is Fi, correct? That would suggest that they feel intensely and privately the full range of emotions. The link in the OP read to me like intense idealism. A complete disenchantment with the human race for not being consistent with their inner ideal. In a way it is like idealism gone over the edge.
 

Meursault

New member
Joined
May 29, 2007
Messages
44
The INFPs primary function is Fi, correct? That would suggest that they feel intensely and privately the full range of emotions. The link in the OP read to me like intense idealism. A complete disenchantment with the human race for not being consistent with their inner ideal. In a way it is like idealism gone over the edge.

I don't know, for me Ne and NI are tied for domancy, the Fi
 

indigo2020

New member
Joined
May 16, 2007
Messages
122
MBTI Type
INFJ
:mellow: *picks up runvardh and puts into kitty carrier*

This is the kajillionth time I'm mentioning it, but I'm an 8w9. The 9 is probably the NFP part coming into play, but otherwise I'm a pretty aggressive person. I've always been the most masculine (in thought at least) of all my female friends, and this is probably because as a verryy leetle girl I'd had only a few friends, who were all male. People also say I seem intimidating when I'm not smiling...I think it's a height thing. I can also be rather irritable. I can be a bit of a people pleaser...but I'm not that great at faking things. I HATE mind games, and I cannot tolerate them being played on me. I lose my mind. I become violent. I destroy things. I never play them myself, unless my father, an INTJ, crosses the line of control (and it drives him nuts when I do this). I have serious control and respect issues, and I internalize *everything* - if something hurtful said by others doesn't secretly bother me a little, then it only means I've managed to push it to the back of my mind. However, most of the time I'm extremely laid back and silly and fluffy, and the aggression only comes out when provoked. And so, I will use the more appropriate term of "assertive" :D. "Sassy" is not a word that I would use to describe myself, as it seems a little...excessive.
You shared about your mother once and I was wondering if you know her type?
 

niffer

New member
Joined
Apr 26, 2007
Messages
1,217
MBTI Type
ENfP
Enneagram
8w9
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I know my mother is some form of SJ. ESTJ, I believe.
 

Tigerlily

unscannable
Joined
Jun 21, 2007
Messages
5,942
MBTI Type
TIGR
Enneagram
3w4
I've read the description of an INFJ and some of it I would agree with. I do get involved with suggesting things to other people such as career paths and how to get where I think they should be in life. hehe I like to encourage people to do their best. I love to see deserving people succeed!

Things seem to turn darker for me when people ignore my suggestions and keep crapping their way though life. I have to keep reminding myself that I will be happier if I just mind my own business.

I prefer not to have many friends because it is easier that way. I seem to have high expectations and the only person who can live up to them is my INTJ Husband. I don't choose to be the way that I am and if I could lighten up a little I would!
 

quietmusician

New member
Joined
Nov 29, 2008
Messages
320
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
The descriptions I read of my type seem to paint the picture of a softspoken, sugary sweet individual who would be the perfect first grade teacher. That is probably the one INFPism I am having a hard time claiming.

I like helping other people...sometimes, but I'm not anymore generous than the next person. In fact I often feel exasperated by other people! If I take issue with someone, I don't hide it. I mean, I don't come right out with my dislike of someone, but my behavior towards them makes it pretty darn obvious I think.

I am pretty straightforward when I'm comfortable, and it typically doesn't take me long to get comfortable. I think I've got a lot of that "I am woman, hear me roar" sass to my personality, although to any stranger I come across I am polite and relatively softspoken. But if you spend longer than 10 minutes with me you'll find out pretty fast that I'm not so vanilla.

I have unusually strong, liberal opinions, which I have learned to keep to myself in my conservative, hell fire and brimstone community. But if I feel you can handle how passionately I discuss certain topics, I'll go for it with no hesitation.

NFs, what do you think? Particularly you introverts like me?

The descriptions I read of my type seem to paint the picture of a softspoken, sugary sweet individual who would be the perfect first grade teacher. That is probably the one INFPism I am having a hard time claiming.

I am definitely not the sugar coated type. And the descriptions of INFPs really get to me too sometimes. Personally, I think it bothers me because it makes us sound incredibly weak/small when we are obviously strong in a lot of ways. On another side of this, I just can't relate to much of this type (I'm thinking 58% of these descriptions fit me).

I like helping other people...sometimes, but I'm not anymore generous than the next person. In fact I often feel exasperated by other people! If I take issue with someone, I don't hide it. I mean, I don't come right out with my dislike of someone, but my behavior towards them makes it pretty darn obvious I think.

I really do like helping...only when I'm not really doing anything myself. Other than that, please get away from me. There are times when I need to check myself and step back in a situation. I don't like feeling cornered, that's usually when I lash out. And if I don't like someone right away, they know it. There's no emotion on my face, my monotone voice kicks in, and to them I look like I"m ready to bail or punch someone. I've been called edgy.

I am pretty straightforward when I'm comfortable, and it typically doesn't take me long to get comfortable. I think I've got a lot of that "I am woman, hear me roar" sass to my personality, although to any stranger I come across I am polite and relatively softspoken. But if you spend longer than 10 minutes with me you'll find out pretty fast that I'm not so vanilla.

I'm very straightforward most of the time. And I'm softspoken too and I hate it. I literally do voice projection exercises to correct this.

I have unusually strong, liberal opinions, which I have learned to keep to myself in my conservative, hell fire and brimstone community. But if I feel you can handle how passionately I discuss certain topics, I'll go for it with no hesitation.

I think my area is mostly conservative, I honestly don't know or care to know. I'm not into politics at all. I don't care what people do, just get out of my way. I may sound kind of selfish, but anyone who truly knows me knows that I not in any way.
 

mlittrell

New member
Joined
Sep 3, 2008
Messages
1,387
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
9w1
my opinions/ideals are quite strong and if asked about a certain moral subject (or any subject for that matter) i will debate whatever my point is to the end. if i find i am wrong i will openly admit it. debates should be progressive in thoughts and ideas. there is no point in debating if it is intellectually destructive to either parties.
 
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