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[ENFJ] ENFJs, I need some advice please!

LindseyLadybug

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Oct 18, 2008
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202
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INFJ
I'm giving my college professors who have meant something to me a Christmas gift and a thank you letter. I got them a mug with hot chocolate mix and an ornament. (They both LOVE chocolate.)

Of course, the most meaningful part is the letter that goes with it. I happen to know that my choir director is an ENFJ and I was trying to think of what to write in her letter. I decided to share what I've come up with and ask for your input. This is especially important to me because I want to make a good impression. I loved the two choirs I'm in so much that I'm planning on taking both every semester until I graduate. I am still quiet and shy in class (but she has been soooo patient and encouraging) because I barely know anyone and singing in a choir with strangers makes me feel vulnerable (but I still enjoy it). I do laugh a lot and my facial expressions (often unintentionally) let people know exactly what I'm thinking. I just want to make sure I get the message across clearly because this is the means of communication I'm most comfortable with.

"Dr. ______,
I hope you have a wonderful Christmas! I feel so blessed to have you for a choir director. You are truly outstanding! I have really enjoyed being in choir again. You make it fun, challenging, and engaging. I am grateful for your continued patience and encouragement because it has helped me grow tremendously. Even if you don't hear it often, I hope you realize how much of an impact you make. Thank you for all you do!

Love, ______"
 

The Third Rider

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Well if I would receive that I would say that, that is pretty damn high praise.:D
 

Valiant

Courage is immortality
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Have you graduated? If not, it might be taken as kissing ass in order to get somewhere, to say it bluntly.
 

INTJMom

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I'm giving my college professors who have meant something to me a Christmas gift and a thank you letter. I got them a mug with hot chocolate mix and an ornament. (They both LOVE chocolate.)

Of course, the most meaningful part is the letter that goes with it. I happen to know that my choir director is an ENFJ and I was trying to think of what to write in her letter. I decided to share what I've come up with and ask for your input. This is especially important to me because I want to make a good impression. I loved the two choirs I'm in so much that I'm planning on taking both every semester until I graduate. I am still quiet and shy in class (but she has been soooo patient and encouraging) because I barely know anyone and singing in a choir with strangers makes me feel vulnerable (but I still enjoy it). I do laugh a lot and my facial expressions (often unintentionally) let people know exactly what I'm thinking. I just want to make sure I get the message across clearly because this is the means of communication I'm most comfortable with.

"Dr. ______,
I hope you have a wonderful Christmas! I feel so blessed to have you for a choir director. You are truly outstanding! I have really enjoyed being in choir again. You make it fun, challenging, and engaging. I am grateful for your continued patience and encouragement because it has helped me grow tremendously. Even if you don't hear it often, I hope you realize how much of an impact you make. Thank you for all you do!

Love, ______"
I think it's perfect just the way it is! :hug:
 

LindseyLadybug

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Oct 18, 2008
Messages
202
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INFJ
Have you graduated? If not, it might be taken as kissing ass in order to get somewhere, to say it bluntly.

No, I haven't graduated. But aren't you an ENTJ? Perhaps an ENFJ would not take it that way. That is certainly not my intention plus I wouldn't really "get somewhere" because I'm a Deaf Ed major, not a Music major. I'm in choir for fun so there's nothing I would gain from this. I remember one time she mentioned to another teacher that she doesn't know if her students enjoy choir because no one ever tells her. I would want someone to tell me if what I put all my effort into meant anything. How would you word it? I'll take any help I can get.
 

Silent Stars

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I think it's very sweet, I'm sure she'll love it. It sounds very much like something I'd write. I really love doing stuff like that. :)
 

LindseyLadybug

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I think it's very sweet, I'm sure she'll love it. It sounds very much like something I'd write. I really love doing stuff like that. :)

Thanks! I love encouraging people, especially those whose service is taken for granted.
 

Silent Stars

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Same here. It really makes a difference, much more so than most people realize.
 

Domino

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That's very sweet, Lindsey. She'll appreciate your thoughtfulness. :)
 

Tallulah

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I think that's lovely. I wouldn't worry about being seen as kissing up. Teachers like to be appreciated.
 

Valiant

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No, I haven't graduated. But aren't you an ENTJ? Perhaps an ENFJ would not take it that way. That is certainly not my intention plus I wouldn't really "get somewhere" because I'm a Deaf Ed major, not a Music major. I'm in choir for fun so there's nothing I would gain from this. I remember one time she mentioned to another teacher that she doesn't know if her students enjoy choir because no one ever tells her. I would want someone to tell me if what I put all my effort into meant anything. How would you word it? I'll take any help I can get.

Alright, then. Tell her. I do however know a few ENFJ's and I know how they reason... If you had anything to gain from this, it wouldn't matter how sincere your feelings were, they would take it as kissing ass... But since you don't have anything to gain from this, fine :) Then it's just good.
 

LindseyLadybug

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Oct 18, 2008
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Thanks PinkPiranha & Tallulah!

YourLocalJesus-Oh, I see what you mean now. Good point. I may make it a little more concise.
 

INTJMom

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I would not change a thing.
Your teachers know you.
They understand where you are coming from when you say something sincere and heartfelt.

If an ENTJ said those things, then it might be understood as "kissing up".
 

LindseyLadybug

New member
Joined
Oct 18, 2008
Messages
202
MBTI Type
INFJ
I would not change a thing.
Your teachers know you.
They understand where you are coming from when you say something sincere and heartfelt.

Thanks, that's sweet of you to say. I sure hope so. I've been so quiet and shy that she'll probably be like, "What?! Where did all these words come from?" :shock: I'm so mysterious...hehe.


If an ENTJ said those things, then it might be understood as "kissing up".

Yeah, that's true. Haha!
 
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