[MBTI General] Must NF's be right?

[ngannacvy]

They know things intuitively, without being able to pinpoint why, and without detailed knowledge of the subject at hand. They are usually right, and they usually know it. Consequently, INFJs put a tremendous amount of faith into their instincts and intuitions.

the INFJ themselves does not really understand their intuition at a level which can be verbalized.

Because the INFJ has such strong intuitive capabilities, they trust their own instincts above all else. This may result in an INFJ stubbornness and tendency to ignore other people's opinions. They believe that they're right. On the other hand, INFJ is a perfectionist who doubts that they are living up to their full potential.

 

[Penguin]

are u sure ur BF isn't INFP?
NFP's ussually have the tendency to make unspoken rules for almost every situation, and if he is a more verbal person he may voice his opinions if those rules are broken, instead of keeping them inside like most NFP's
this is not a remark to the stubbornness but I saw you said something about fighting over small things and it gave me something to think about

 

[runvardh]

The OP sounds kind of like the situation my father and I find ourselves in with family members. My father especially has ended up too right too often and his siblings have commented that "he doesn't have to be right all the time." The truth is, it's the things they do that make him right and due to the nature of those situations he has ended up hating being right. I don't get the comments as often, mostly due to the fact that I don't tell the family half of what my father does; but I've still seen enough situations happening to also hate being right quite often. The thing that would actually make both myself and my father happy at those times is the surprise of being wrong.

 

[Tallulah]

I get this too. I'm definitely an NT, but after years of trying to "prove" myself, I came to the conclusion that it's honestly quite pointless. I don't care about "being right" anymore, I just want a harmonious relationship. It has nothing to do with making sure that no feelings are hurt, and more to do with energy levels/whether it's worth it or not.

I find that with NFs, you don't need to concede that they're "right", you can just (as an INTJ) say "I can see why you say that, and I understand your pov... but I can't agree with that generalisation given my personal experiences". Which often mollifies them without making them "right" or yourself "wrong"... and cuts off the argument, pretty much. Basically, just make sure that (if valid), their feelings are validated by yourself. If they're not valid, make a joke about it and try to make them feel better some how.

+1

 

[nolla]

To me, he is far more stubborn, especially when he feels wronged. Yet you all feel us NT's must be right all the time!

And all of my NF friends are the same too! They all get so upset if they feel someone wronged them, and they push it until you agree with them! Whereas, I'll let it go!

For me the word you should pay attention here is "wronged". It changes the whole meaning of the discussion. I can debate about stuff without feeling like I have to defend the subject personally. But if I feel "wronged" it is very personal and I will sooner or later lose my perspective and start defending the subject as if I was defending myself. It is usually hard to make me feel that way, but the NTs seem to be very good in this.

INFJs tend to have strong set of opinions under the surface. And you can't debate those. They might listen to what you say but they don't change their beliefs easily.

 

[Simplexity]

For me the word you should pay attention here is "wronged". It changes the whole meaning of the discussion. I can debate about stuff without feeling like I have to defend the subject personally. But if I feel "wronged" it is very personal and I will sooner or later lose my perspective and start defending the subject as if I was defending myself. It is usually hard to make me feel that way, but the NTs seem to be very good in this.

INFJs tend to have strong set of opinions under the surface. And you can't debate those. They might listen to what you say but they don't change their beliefs easily.

Yes I am not going to lie that used to be one of my favorite past times and a tactic I used to use to impressive affect in my confrontations with all sorts of authority.

 

[Penda]

I am like this with my INTJ friend under certain circumstances. Although my normal inclination is to promote harmony, I become very persistent in certain philosophical discussions. Eventually she tends to drop out of the argument, even though it's not particularly heated or anything. I am particularly stubborn when it comes to my worldview. While I will bow to superior reasoning (and then retreat to modify my philosophical arguments to respond to these valid criticisms), I tend to take whatever opportunity comes to promote my ideas or improve on them in a non-beligerent fashion. What better way to ultimately promote harmony in the world than to come to a consensus on certain basic truths?

On the other hand, I tend to be very laissez-faire and tolerant on anything else.

 

[SillySapienne]

In an argument I never, or rarely care about being wrong, or right, (sorry, I just think that is stupid) and care a shit ton more about being a clear communicator and being understood.

I argue to understand and be understood, not to win or lose.

 

[Nonsensical]

I think it all comes down to the criteria of what one if right about..which relates to S and N..(I could be way off)..but I think Ns would be more "right" about certain things, whereas S's, others..most likely the specifics..because it's not always the case that people who are very very specific, and right at the same time, are Ns..

I hope that made sense, and I hope that was in the right direction

 

[wedekit]

I am guilty of always wanting to be right. It's something I've had to work on lately. When I am wrong I feel ignorant for some reason, and I realize that it's kind of ridiculous to expect to be right all the time.

When I answer a question wrong in class (out loud) I feel very ignorant. I admire people who whip out wrong answers like it's nobody's business!

 

[quietmusician]

I don't have that way of thinking. I do know that my INTJ friend is like this, especially on his worst days.