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  1. #1
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2019

    Default Help me with my INFJ professor

    So I'm a freshman and I have that one professor whom I like a lot. I figured out he is an INFJ. I'm an INFP and I think we are quite close, or at least I hope we do. We've had a couple of conversations after lectures, he loves active students and I love his subject so the initial attraction was guaranteed. I've been somewhat emotionally vulnerable with him and opened up a little and I was never fake (I simply can't be fake around such loving people). He is always helpful just like any INFJ and he knows I'm interested in lots of things and am able to have deep conversations. I couldn't take his class this semester so we haven't really interacted for a couple of months but last time we met was five days ago and we were gently smiling at each other all the way through the conversation, it was clear I was happy to see him and I think he was just as happy to see me.

    So here's the first question: if you were a professor (better yet if you really are), how would you react to students like me, considering my behaviour, curiosity and type (if you happen to be close with INFPs, that is)? Would you be willing to start a semi-friendly relationship at all and how would I know that? I know this varies from person to person but I really need some guidance on how to behave as this kind of relationship seems somewhat unusual to me. I really want to get close without being inappropriate, I draw inspiration from Hannah Arendt and Karl Jaspers. Mutual trust, fatherly care from his side, letters/ emails filled with deep and personal thoughts, talking for hours on end, helping each other during hard times... God, that would be just absolutely wonderful and that's my ultimate goal. I mentioned Jaspers and not Heidegger because, well, my professor is a little over 70 and our affection is rather gentle, the kind you would expect from an INFJ.

    My second question is about interruptions. I once mentioned being not very happy with the work I had done and wanted to go on and explain why but he interrupted me and said it was perfectly normal because everyone feels that way at one time or another. Then we kept talking. Is it common for INFJs to interrupt people, specifically in situations like these? I thought he would hear me out. He is know to be very talkative in a good way and have a lot to say. It's hard to interrupt him in turn (I know because I've heard him talk to his colleagues) and he always looks rather confident so I suspect he might be the INFJ-A type.

    I'd really love to know what you have to say.

  2. #2
    Squirrel! Hermit of the Forest's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2017
    9w1 so/sx


    I’m not a professor, but if you have questions or would like to discuss an interesting topic with anyone there’s no harm in trying, so long as it is appropriate. They can always say they’re busy or just ignore you if they’re not interested.

    As for INFJs interrupting, yes, the one I know interrupts me for time to time. I don’t if it’s an INFJ characteristic or merely a quirk of our particular dynamic. Though, come think of it, I’ve never known her to ‘hear someone out’ before offering advice or counsel if she believed she understood the problem.
    Chase the adventure. Cherish the joy.

    1. Eager to know or learn something.
    2. Strange; unusual.

    INTP 9w1 2w1 5w6 so/sx

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