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  1. #11
    Lungs & Lips Locked Unkindloving's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009
    ENFj None


    I don't have many close friends irl. I've cycled through a number of people who i thought i was close with, but growing up together just made us grow apart.

    Right now, there are a two or three people from high school that i hadn't been close with until the past few years.
    The majority of my close friends were met through various internet instances. It's actually quite amusing the connections i have and the silly sites they've established from., Yahoo chat, OhMyGoth chat, Livejournal, and TypeC. The first three have given me friendships that have lasted for 8-9 years.
    Hang on traveling woman - Don't sacrifice your plan
    Cause it will come back to you - Before you lose it on the man

    .:: DWTWD ::.

    There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked - It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance

  2. #12
    Pose! Salt n' pepper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009


    Atm, I have three close friends.

    One is my childhood friend, and INFP. We went to kindergarten together but I lost contact with her when my family moved, and we didn't talk for 5 years. We later resumed contact when her father died in cancer, but that was only a coincidence, I didn't know he had cancer when I called. We've been best friends since, and she's my only friend who's a girl. Well, only close friend.

    Number two, is one I met when I took my divers licence. He was crushing on me, and I told him straight up that if he continued flirting with me, we couldn't be friends. He took a few days to ponder this, then decided he wanted to stay in touch. I'm glad he did, because he's my best friend now. We've only known each other a year, but we're pretty much are the same person, he's ENTj and a lot older than I am. But we just, understand each other. And I think he has stopped flirting with me, at least realistically.

    Third one is this guy I met on OKCupid. He contacted me, also about a year ago, and even though he has a gf, we stayed in contact and have become great friends. I've never met him but we talk every day and we think very much alike. His tests said he was INTJ.

    Hm, I've got one more friend whom I consider a close friend, but we don't talk everyday, like I do with the other three. But when we do talk, we connect. We worked together for a brief moment, met about 2-3 years ago. She's probably ISTJ.

    I truly value these people, because I can really be myself with them and they still chose to hang around.

  3. #13
    Artisan Conquerer Halla74's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    7w8 sx/so


    Type Stats:
    MBTI -> (E) 77.14% | (i) 22.86% ; (S) 60% | (n) 40% ; (T) 72.22% | (f) 27.78% ; (P) 51.43% | (j) 48.57%
    BIG 5 -> Extroversion 77% ; Accommodation 60% ; Orderliness 62% ; Emotional Stability 64% ; Open Mindedness 74%

    "If somebody asks your MBTI type on a first date, run". -Donna Cecilia
    "Enneagram is psychological underpinnings. Cognitive Functions are mental reasoning and perceptional processes. -Sanjuro

  4. #14
    Senior Member Sparrow's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010


    I have a lot of close friends, but as I’ve grown older I noticed that its hard to make lasting connections with new friends (I am 29 now)…and have wondered why as well.

    -James & Leslie: (they are siblings) Met them on the playground when I was 5, James was 4, & Leslie was 2, our mom’s are both Korean so they became best friends as well. My oldest friends love them.

    -Heather: Met in 6th grade in Ms. Vincent’s class & we still hang out!

    -Nely: Met when we were 13 through a mutual friend, we used my old neighbor for rides to the mall (I know junior high kids are mean). We co founded a posse of girls called the Ladies of Mischief (L.O.M.) lol .

    -Tien: Met when we were 14 on the G-Line lol. The G-line is equivalent to MySpace or face book. Internet wasn’t huge back then so we hijacked voicemails and left messages on the intro back and forth with tons of random kids. Funny shit.

    -Sarah: Met in art class in 8th grade. She was the new girl. She saw Nely’s name tagged on my bag so she asked me about it, they went to school together. Been best friends since!

    -Vy: She was scrawny nerd, but I thought she was pretty. I wanted to give her a make over. I recruited her in to the schools Asian posse lol.

    -Tina: We met when we were 19, we always saw her each other at raves but never really talked, thought she hated me. One day we both ended up at a mutual friend’s house and became best friends.

    -Becca: Met her 2 years ago in the electronic music scene, she’s my ENFJ partner in crime . Our boyfriends are really good friends now too, yippy!
    Last edited by Sparrow; 07-17-2010 at 08:14 PM.
    Fe | Ni | Se | Ti ... 3w4 ... Lawful Neutral ... Johari -Nohari

  5. #15
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009


    I met my close friends through school. Friendship appreciation post! I notice that I make friends with people in a very random way and once we meet, we just click and our relationship just grows until we are best friends and I look back and wonder how it happened, but it's just a quick blur.

    oldest friend - esfj - met in middle school- lots of ups and downs with this one at the beginning but over the years, we have sort of 'accommodated' each other. she's more laid-back/mature and i'm more aggressive/expressive so we are better suited for each other now than we were before. she understands me well and i her. we usually have long, intense conversations revolving around our hopes, dreams, futures, present problems. she is a handful most times.

    best friend now - isfj - met in a creative writing class - was very random, asked her if she wanted to hang out over spring break because we were both on campus and i was feeling outspoken that day - instantly felt comfortable with each other - dated her friend - became closer and we speak on the phone regularly. she let me crash on her couch for about two months. love her to death. she's very quirky and loving. she is a handful sometimes.

    ex roommate - istj - she's very calm and logical, wasn't very warm when I first met her, has matured since then, is always asking me what we are planning to do, not open to new experiences, very judgmental but in a sarcastic, funny way that I also share. she says things that i am thinking of but would never say and it is hilarious.

    friend - infj i believe but a very unhealthy one - we used to be two peas in a pod but as i am becoming healthier, she is still the same so we are imbalanced and sometimes she is too much on me with her constant negativity/self-pity. but she is absolutely non-judgmental and i could tell her anything and she wouldn't blink. am very, very comfortable with her. she talks a lot, which points a bit to extrovert but she has all the other traits of an introvert. her type have always been a mystery to me - but i think infj is a good fit so far. we met in college in one of the common rooms and i asked if she wanted to go get something to eat. then, we were attached like glue.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    7 sx/so


    University, skiing, music (through playing in bands), and the gym. 1 or 2 through work.
    Likes Noon liked this post

  7. #17
    Junior Member Derogatory's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2013


    I met my best friend in the Harry Potter forum, then I was like 13? Then we went to the same art school, where we started to communicate more. And it's quite an interesting thing: I'm ENTP and she's ISFJ. We get together quite well, although we have those discussions and argues time to time. Basically, we have the same functions, just they are operating in the different order. What do you think, do the those functions help us to understand each other better or it's not true, because all the letters of our MBTI types are completely different?

  8. #18
    Temporal Mechanic. Lexicon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    5w6 sp/sx


    ISFP- Penpal in the UK I've been corresponding with since I was 8yrs old. Our mothers were part of some penpal program as children, & remained friends, then forced us to write to eachother. We'd make fun of them and talk about how weird it was. The family has visited us a few times over the years, & I spent a few months over there, yrs ago. (she may be coming to CA this August! ) She and the ESFP feel almost more like relatives, in a way.

    ESFP - lived across the street from me for many years (12-17). I was unable to escape her infectious fun.

    INTP- gym class, junior high (though we didn't actually become extremely close friends until we were about 21). Kept ending up in the same gym classes together, wandering the track, talking about everything & nothing. "We should hang out sometime." /space out, never did in our younger yrs.

    ENTP- met in high school gym class, when I was 15, happened to be friend of my boyfriend's at the time. Had study halls afterward, would go to the library for them, so we could hang out. Skipped some classes together after lunch.. increasingly often. Hide under the stairwell or just leave the school grounds altogether, running from the dumpy security guard through the woods. Listen to music at his house (yes, we were the "troubled" people, to say the least). Gave eachother support/dissected people and our own fucked up families and minds. To a lesser extent, I was also good friends with the ESFP, ISFP, & IxTP that were regularly around him. I guess if I were to say I was part of a particular 'clique' in HS, that would've been it. More or less accepted as one of the guys. They're all still friends now, & I see them from time to time/catch up, though I'm far closer to the ENTP.

    ENTJ- Initially started talking during some discussion in class that became a debate.. I won. He gave me a hug later on just to make me uncomfortable (revenge). Dated in highschool briefly, then again as adults. Remained good friends ever since. At this point I see him more as a friend than an ex lover. The love's there, but it's not romantic attachment. Just the same genuine appreciation & value that this particular human being exists. Like all my close friends. We share a passion for psychological exploration, and of stage/theater- moreover musical theater.

    ISTP- (we're not particularly close anymore) met at a local show (17), bonded through music, discussing ridiculous things, shared a love for adventuring/being nocturnal. Were apartment roommates at one point, which worked out until he went off his bipolar meds/started pointing loaded guns at me (2009). Things have been distant, since then, couple years now. Unfortunate.

    INFP- met in 2008 at a local show my INTP friend dragged me to. He was playing drums for a friend's band when we walked in, had a neutral expression on his face (concentrating) I found amusing. Was sitting in a corner later on, and he ended up being nearby, when a terrible nu-metal (/redundant) band came on, and the drummer threw his stick- almost knocked the INFP's beer outta his hands- this occurring sparked conversation, and we ended up becoming extremely close friends, through our love of music, discussing projects, and I'd go see his own bands stuff/support/sometimes participate in vocals.

    ISFP- met in 2008 as well, through a mutual ESTP (not a particularly close) friend- they were roommates- we bonded through music-- helping him with/giving feedback on projects/discussing relationships/hanging out and just enjoying the now/getting outta my head

    That does it for IRL. I've made a good deal of close (a spectrum) friends on this forum, and had the pleasure of hanging out with a few of them in-person, as well, over the years. I won't list them, though. Overall, all of my friends share a high degree of intellectual/emotional chemistry with me. Mutual appreciation, understanding, supplemental insights & discovery.

    So, ultimately - when I was younger, environmental factors such as living location/going to a school led me to having bonds with particular people, then as I grew more independent, environments I chose to immerse myself in became the meeting places. Fortunately, those older friends have grown in life along with me, so we always have new things to share (except the ISTP I mentioned, who I had to detach from for my own safety).

    Probably seems odd to some that an introvert would have a long list of 'close' friends IRL, but bear in mind, these are people I hardly see/talk to. The element of closeness comes from that initial bonding, I guess. After a certain point, once you're in, you're in, and I love you for life/intuitively know we'll always remain so, despite distance/infrequent contact. Over time we can pick up like no time has passed at all. The most beautiful parts of life dwell within those places where time does not exist, but at the same time, there's still somehow forward motion through space. If that makes sense.

    *edit* HOLY SHIT. I forgot the most important friend.

    ExTP- I was 19.. One Friday evening I'd gone to a Blockbuster video rental place with my ESFP friend.. then wandered into the Family Pet & Aquarium, nextdoor, to pick up supplies for her rat. Tall wire cage in the corner. Two kittens inside. A pudgy gray fluffball, & a tabby. Walked by and one snagged my sleeve. Didn't see which had done it, though. No choice but to interact with them. The tabby was very excited that someone was close, mewing repeatedly. I held him first, and he purred like a.. lawnmower. Store clerk put him back, and handed me the docile, fat gray one. ESFP cooed over it. The tabby, in the meantime, climbed from the bottom of the cage all the way to eye-level with me, mewing loudly-thrusting a paw out toward me as far as it'd go. Falling down, and making the climb again, reaching out. Sold. I had to wait til Monday to take him home (shots). In the interim, I played cards with this cool old ESTP guy at my job, named Jack, who was a local brewery trucker/grew up in Brooklyn, used to tell me cool stories (nicknamed me 'Billy Badass' and gave me some old records).. Anyway- told him if I lost, I'd name my new kitten after him. He didn't believe me. I made good on my word, when I picked Jack the kitty up that Monday.
    Last edited by Lexicon; 05-04-2013 at 08:02 PM. Reason: <:3)~
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!

    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  9. #19


    Somewhat of a common thread running through these posts is that making friends seems to get harder with age. I've had that same experience. The transition through school, getting a job, having kids, etc. seems to be a time when many close friends part ways. Many of my close friends who had kids simply disappeared, which is somewhat understandable, but also frustrating and strange at the same time. I know having kids is difficult, but if you can't even reach out once a year to your friends, then what's really the point? A while back I met a really great group of people, some of which were in town temporarily for school. We gathered often and had a great time, spoke in different languages, played music together, etc. Then something happened. A few people became passive aggressive and started distancing themselves from everyone else. A few others followed and pretty soon the entire group dissolved. I tried mending whatever happened, but no one was talking and everyone said, rather disingenuously, that everything was actually OK. I still see people from this old group, but not with any kind of frequency. And since I was pretty unpopular in high school I didn't make a single lasting connection there. So I keep trying. People keep coming and going and I've almost given up on the idea of intimate lasting friendships. I've had some friends throughout the years that I thought were close, but in every case something happened to turn things sour. Usually something stupid. When I met my wife, my closest friend at the time became unbelievably irate with me. It became intolerable so I just stopped communicating. None of it really makes any sense.
    Ed Womack
    Get Milked

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    5w6 sx/so


    Soccer, soccer, soccer, soccer, and did I say SOCCER!!??

    Seriously, it's such a social sport, and it forges real friendships; too bad I'm too old to play now.

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