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  1. #1
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    Default Does This ENFP Like Me?

    I've been friends with this ENFP (male) for a while now. Last year, I made an attempt (as an INTJ, I know, unbelievable) to make my feelings clear by baking him a loaf of bread (INTJ fail) and writing him a long card for his birthday. In the card, I didn't say it outright that I like it---it was simply a hint that he was special. Oddly, he didn't even say 'thank you' (of which he later mentioned that he didn't know how to respond, thus the silence).

    It has been months since then and our 'friendship' isn't the same. Maybe because I stopped trying? Who knows... But recently, he has been acting differently. Perhaps other ENFPs can tell me if these signs are something:

    - He asked for my opinion about a personal matter and used the advice given. Then later, sent me a message saying he couldn't have done the right thing without my advice.
    - He forwards videos, memes, and silly trivia (I suppose due to being in quarantine) almost daily.
    - With the above said, we text daily. And he likes doing 'whyyy' or 'okayyy' , etc. (Could be because of Covid-19 too)(Could be because of Covid-19 too)
    - He invited me to Zoom call recently and the first thing he said was, "Just seeing your face makes me happy". The first 30 minutes were about his business plans, which I've already heard countless times, since he repeats himself often. The next couple of hours was random stuff, with moments of silence, stupid jokes, and me going way past my bedtime (till 2am). I caught him yawning at least 7 times since 1am but I felt like neither of us wanted to end the call. Anyway... moving on.
    - He gets my opinion about his business, and takes my word for any matters in my area of expertise without question.
    - In regards to his business, I feel like he's trying to get me involved in it as much as possible. He literally merged my plan with his, so that we could work together long term.

    For the most part, I feel like he has been hot and cold. And perhaps, he just sees me as a 'business partner' with nothing romantic. Thus, the above could be completely nothing. But I thought there was no harm putting this here to see what other ENFPs think.

    Your thoughts are most welcomed!

  2. #2
    Mr. Brightside... The Cat's Avatar
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    You could always mention a hypothetical of what if you liked each other? See what sort of reaction you get.

    Or you could always go for the direct approach and say you like them, and wonder if they might like you too?

    ...Because I'm Mr. Brightside.


    Oh, we're always all right. You remember that. We happen to other people.

  3. #3
    ιяяєѕιѕтιвlє Ꮆяαѕρ Luminous's Avatar
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    The comment about seeing your face means it's more than business; he at least considers you a friend. Maybe relax and invite him to more zoom calls?

  4. #4
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    @The Cat I think I might end up doing that when I can't take it anymore. I need to move on eventually.

    @Luminous, now this... would require some strategy. Haha! I also thought it strange when he said that, and then wondered... since he's an ENFP, how many people does he say that to?

  5. #5
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    He really like you and really want you by his side. As ENFP male, we are the most flirtatious one yet the hardest to get. what comes easy in life will has no value, that also include relationships; efforts required. We value sincerity and honesty, he definitely get the hint and understand your feeling and motives. we are empathetic, we read people. what he want might be:

    that to you to say it outright that you like it front of his face.....
    then, its yours... like my girl did.

  6. #6
    Terpsichore Abcdenfp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTJ1234 View Post
    I've been friends with this ENFP (male) for a while now. Last year, I made an attempt (as an INTJ, I know, unbelievable) to make my feelings clear by baking him a loaf of bread (INTJ fail) and writing him a long card for his birthday. In the card, I didn't say it outright that I like it---it was simply a hint that he was special. Oddly, he didn't even say 'thank you' (of which he later mentioned that he didn't know how to respond, thus the silence).

    It has been months since then and our 'friendship' isn't the same. Maybe because I stopped trying? Who knows... But recently, he has been acting differently. Perhaps other ENFPs can tell me if these signs are something:

    - He asked for my opinion about a personal matter and used the advice given. Then later, sent me a message saying he couldn't have done the right thing without my advice.
    - He forwards videos, memes, and silly trivia (I suppose due to being in quarantine) almost daily.
    - With the above said, we text daily. And he likes doing 'whyyy' or 'okayyy' , etc. (Could be because of Covid-19 too)(Could be because of Covid-19 too)
    - He invited me to Zoom call recently and the first thing he said was, "Just seeing your face makes me happy". The first 30 minutes were about his business plans, which I've already heard countless times, since he repeats himself often. The next couple of hours was random stuff, with moments of silence, stupid jokes, and me going way past my bedtime (till 2am). I caught him yawning at least 7 times since 1am but I felt like neither of us wanted to end the call. Anyway... moving on.
    - He gets my opinion about his business, and takes my word for any matters in my area of expertise without question.
    - In regards to his business, I feel like he's trying to get me involved in it as much as possible. He literally merged my plan with his, so that we could work together long term.

    For the most part, I feel like he has been hot and cold. And perhaps, he just sees me as a 'business partner' with nothing romantic. Thus, the above could be completely nothing. But I thought there was no harm putting this here to see what other ENFPs think.

    Your thoughts are most welcomed!
    Well I cant answer from a male perspective just a female perspective. We are seen to be very flirty in general but actually reserve certain behaviors for people we like. I tend to be a little more volatile with my emotional reaction to someone I like , putting more of my emotional response on how they respond. So for example if you are just my friend and i see that you are taking my flirting to heart i will draw back and make very clear lines so as to not confuse you. However if i like you and im not clear on if you like me i may become "hot and cold" in an effort to discover how you feel based on your behavior. ( I am seeking patterns)

    I get that we can be confusing , sometimes we confuse ourselves. but also remember independence is VERY important to us. So i wouldn't include someone in my business transactions if i didn't highly value them or see them as an important part of my life.
    blow a kiss to the universe and it is certain to wink at you in return.
    Likes Coll liked this post

  7. #7
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    I think I should update: a few days after I posted this, I told him I was catching feelings and he clarified that he is not looking for a relationship.

    We're now working together... and as an INTJ, I guess I have to thank my logic for being able to separate work and emotions. Sometimes though, he still does things that give me a tiny bit of hope (like secretly taking my picture and sending it to me the day after), but I've decided to discredit everything.

    Oh well...
    Likes Abcdenfp, Luminous liked this post

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