Faux-nobo: “Naked Bonobo” demolishes myth of sexy, egalitarian bonobos

[ChocolateMoose123]

Sounds like an interesting book.

It is weird that people use that "promiscuous bonobo vs. murderer chimp" thing as an argument for why we should all reassess the foundations of human behavior and suddenly remake ourselves (in the image of bonobos).

I've seen an article claiming that humans were actually closer to bonobos than to chimps, and suggesting that this idea should give people hope. As though we were all suffering from a collective self-image problem, "I'm a chimp; I was born a chimp, and I'll always be a chimp, and there's no use fighting it", believing ourselves to be a chip off the old chimp block, when in reality, we were all beautiful bonobo swans, just waiting for someone to awaken us to our true nature.

"Oh, thank you, now that I know my true heritage, I can finally let out my inner bonobo, and together, we will heal society."

Obviously, you would get an F in your "Intro To Being Meta" college class.

 

[Lark]

 

[Metis]

Obviously, you would get an F in your "Intro To Being Meta" college class.

Meta-chimp?

not true, what about hate sex, and slaughtering home intruders?

Hate sex? Never heard of it.

“Tension-reducing” sex among bonobos is most often not about fun. It is not about enthusiastic consent, but coercion on threat of aggression. Like humans, we know that bonobos have preferred sexual partners. But the social friction most likely occurs between two individuals who are not close or friendly. Bonobos are therefore required to offer sexual contact to individuals they do not like. Faced with an agitated, aggressive male you do not care for, how do you women feel about offering copulation to calm him? And men, how do you feel about offering a penis to rub or your rump for the same? This is the bonobo way.

I'm glad I'm not a bonobo.

 

[Warrior]

Meta-chimp?



Hate sex? Never heard of it.





I'm glad I'm not a bonobo.

Hate sex means having sex with someone you hate.

 

[Lark]

Hate sex means having sex with someone you hate.

This should not be possible.

 

[Warrior]

This should not be possible.

apparently the brain chemicals involved in hating the person make it all the more exciting....hang on, let me pull up an article......The Psychology Behind Angry Sex: Why You Love 'Hooking Up' With Someone You Hate

 

[Lark]

apparently the brain chemicals involved in hating the person make it all the more exciting....hang on, let me pull up an article......The Psychology Behind Angry Sex: Why You Love 'Hooking Up' With Someone You Hate

This all seems abnormal to me, this is contrary to my experience but also what I've read in Berne and Fromm.

 

[Metis]

Meta-Chimp Test

The chimp cells have begun metastasizing to your brain. In a matter of weeks, you'll forget that you were ever human. You want to prepare for your future as a chimp: What do you do?

A) Transport yourself ASAP to the most chimp-friendly wild environment you can. You want to live free.
B) Turn yourself and power-of-attorney over to animal control. The important thing is others' safety first.
C) Stock up on aluminum foil. I don't know why you would do this, but someone's going to want it as an option...
D) Hire [MENTION=30122]Cat Brainz[/MENTION] to build a rocket for you. Travel around the solar system. You won't know what it is, but you'll still get to be a chimp in zero G! Bye, bonobos!

I picked D.

 

[Metis]

Hate sex means having sex with someone you hate.

That doesn't sound very appealing.

About as much fun as:

 

[Lord Lavender]

Meta-Chimp Test

The chimp cells have begun metastasizing to your brain. In a matter of weeks, you'll forget that you were ever human. You want to prepare for your future as a chimp: What do you do?

A) Transport yourself ASAP to the most chimp-friendly wild environment you can. You want to live free.
B) Turn yourself and power-of-attorney over to animal control. The important thing is others' safety first.
C) Stock up on aluminum foil. I don't know why you would do this, but someone's going to want it as an option...
D) Hire [MENTION=30122]Cat Brainz[/MENTION] to build a rocket for you. Travel around the solar system. You won't know what it is, but you'll still get to be a chimp in zero G! Bye, bonobos!

I picked D.

Im honestly flattered you think I can build a rocket . By the way I dont blame you for picking D at all since it is a rather more shall we say interesting result than the other 3 plus we can put a camera on your head and observe your chimp mind slowly get madder and madder in the confines of this rocket but then I do care for the rights of living beings so I shall make my rocket chimp friendly such as installing climbing frames, poop throwing areas (Im combining A and D and putting other chimps in with you as its a experiment to see how semi-sapient animals thrive in isolation) and then you shall have cameras implanted into your eyes so your eyes are always taking photographs and replying them back to Earth what happens on board the rocket and what you see and we may even send to en route to Mars .

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

This should not be possible.

It is for people who are self-loathing and desperate.

 

[Metis]

Im honestly flattered you think I can build a rocket .

Frankly, it was a decision made out of sheer nepotism. You're the only person I've "friended". It pays to put yourself forward, I guess.

By the way I dont blame you for picking D at all since it is a rather more shall we say interesting result than the other 3 plus we can put a camera on your head and observe your chimp mind slowly get madder and madder in the confines of this rocket

That's what's going to happen, since you're locking me up with those other chimps. Who said they could come along for the ride?

but then I do care for the rights of living beings so I shall make my rocket chimp friendly such as installing climbing frames

Thank you.

poop throwing areas (Im combining A and D and putting other chimps in with you as its a experiment to see how semi-sapient animals thrive in isolation)

And how are the designated boundaries of these arenas going to be enforced so that the whole vessel doesn't become one big stinky mess?

and then you shall have cameras implanted into your eyes so your eyes are always taking photographs and replying them back to Earth what happens on board the rocket and what you see

I think I would actually consent to that in advance, since I would want to watch the footage if you ever found a way to regress me back to human.

and we may even send to en route to Mars .

That's cool.

We're going to have to talk about this "putting other chimps in with you" thing, though.

On the other hand, a human handler might be valuable. Someone with a sidekick mentality, though. Maybe an INTP.