INTJ "Intelligent" Myth

[Night]

Because it's a dog-eat-dog world and if you are not very good at sharing your feelings then they get misinterpreted and used against you and become unproductive. Playing on your strengths and hiding your weaknesses while making them less weak along the way works best for me ;P.

Doesn’t that seem like a socially insecure way to conduct yourself? The world at large is often too self-involved to be emotionally imposing.

To be consistently guarded is to fear reprisal. To fear opportunity. Why would you wish to guard yourself against social opportunity?

 

[simulatedworld]

To be consistently guarded is to fear reprisal. To fear opportunity. Why would you wish to guard yourself against social opportunity?

Hah! Definitive proof that Night is not an INTJ!

 

[Lex Talionis]

Doesn’t that seem like a socially insecure way to conduct yourself? The world at large is often too self-involved to be emotionally imposing.

To be consistently guarded is to fear reprisal. To fear opportunity. Why would you wish to guard yourself against social opportunity?

I don't think that is what he intended to imply.

What do you mean by "social opportunity"? Are you referring to the ability to succeed in greater society, or the opportunity to socialize?

The former is more important (in my opinion) than the latter, and is attainable for most INTJs willing to apply themselves.

 

[Lex Talionis]

which is always an EXCELLENT way to keep girlfriends

Want to be my girlfriend?

 

[Night]

I don't think that is what he intended to imply.

What do you mean by "social opportunity"? Are you referring to the ability to succeed in greater society, or the opportunity to socialize?

The former is more important (in my opinion) than the latter, and is attainable for most INTJs willing to apply themselves.

It's a non-specific statement meant to convey likelihood of successful social networking on the basis of willingness to be up-front and amiable with people. An enthusiasm for social experience. The converse of which is what Little Sticks described (and you sympathized with) as a conscious shielding of emotion to outside interference, for reasons probably subjective to the user.

At any rate, your second conclusion affirmed my statement.

 

[miss fortune]

Want to be my girlfriend?

already have an IxTJ at home

meaning I'm onto you guys

I think the argument is just boiling down to emotional intelligence versus intrapersonal intelligence

 

[Little_Sticks]

It's a non-specific statement meant to convey likelihood of successful social networking on the basis of willingness to be up-front and amiable with people. An enthusiasm for social experience. The converse of which is what Little Sticks described (and you sympathized with) as a conscious shielding of emotion to outside interference, for reasons probably subjective to the user.

At any rate, your second conclusion affirmed my statement.

I think you misunderstand. It's not really a shielding of emotions as much as a lack of them. It's this lack of emotion that leads to problems with people that expect certain emotional responses. And to protect the emotions I do have I focus on things that positively reinforce my emotions, which just happens to be anything that doesn't involve clear-cut social interaction. Believe me, I have tried very hard to fake my emotions and try to do them enough so that it becomes instinctive and I enjoy social interaction. But I get no enjoyment out of it and it doesn't work if I act like my stoic, cold, detached and analytical self because that makes others uncomfortable with their own emotions. I don't exactly know the reasons why this is the case. I've been told it's behavioral, or a result of bad parenting, or a genetic difference, or the result of too much time alone in one's head. I don't really care anymore. I just know it's not a natural strength and the only relationships I can enjoy with people have to involve some kind of interest as the central focus (like MBTI, psychology, or the science of how things work and building things, or anything that involves a discussion of ideas and analysis) and not just socializing for the sake of building bonds that I've never understood or felt. And I'm not a psychopath either. I am capable of caring, but not so much in the sympathetic sense; it's more of a desire to want to help and protect that one person that trusts my natural self and let's me be that. I'm a lot like Dexter from the Showtime show Dexter. Everything I do socially has some kind of inherent analysis and a lack of enjoyment of it all, except intimacy which feels very enjoyable. But I sometimes wonder if I enjoy intimacy more because I enjoy sex than I enjoy the husband/wife thing.

And I do realize that if one can play the social game well that they are going to be offered more in life because they will get support from others from this. But I've spent most of my life testing the social waters and failing to do it right and get this social support system. I'm sure someone could just tell me a million reasons why and how I just need to change some things about me to succeed at it, but I'm not dumb; I've taken others advice and tried for far too long. I've never felt so much peace until I just accepted things for what they are. I don't have to struggle with it because I know it's not for me. This might seem narrow-minded, but I think I get to be the best judge of what makes me who I am. I hope that made sense.

 

[onemoretime]

Why do you associate your emotions with something that needs to be protected?

 

[Night]

Thanks for taking the time to spell that out, Little Sticks.

 

[simulatedworld]

Why do you associate your emotions with something that needs to be protected?

Fi?

 

[Little_Sticks]

Why do you associate your emotions with something that needs to be protected?

Because having a genuine problem with someone and having people constantly tell you that you are the problem, that you need psychiatric help, that you're selfish or just self-absorbed, or have people stand there acting perplexed by why you don't enjoy or are able to handle the same things they are and being annoyed with you because of it, thinking you're doing it on purpose. Getting too stressed out from all the fake social interaction and forgetting not to be blunt with someone and suddenly you have this crazy asshole standing in front of you getting physical. Getting kicked out of your home because you don't have the energy to play all the stupid social and organization rules of the ESFJ(step-mother)/ESTJ(father) household. Realizing why you had no friends through school because you act weird to other people and they would rather made fun of you and move along then try and understand you. Realizing why your whole life has felt like huge chore because you are cognitively not even close to normal and have never had introverted tendencies supported by parents and peers. Learning to sleep in a car because having an apartment with someone is too stressful since you need to be completely alone and quiet to relax.

Man, the list goes on and on. And so what the hell exactly are you trying to get at? Everything isn't so clear cut. You can't just say "oh, you're shielding your emotions and that's the problem, so take down the shield, durrrr". That's not the problem. That's not the cause. That's just an affect. The cause is that expressing my emotions isn't natural and when I do it is too shallow, weird, and inappropriate to make the consequences worthwhile.

 

[Little_Sticks]

Fi?

You're being foolish. If I took you and strapped you to a board and slowly chainsawed off one of your arms and you screamed and cried and begged and pleaded against it, I could also say "Fi?" You're abusing the psychology of Jung and MBTI. Fi is not about emotional response or depression or negative feelings and stress responses.

 

[Jaguar]

You're being foolish. If I took you and strapped you to a board and slowly chainsawed off one of your arms and you screamed and cried and begged and pleaded against it, I could also say "Fi?" You're abusing the psychology of Jung and MBTI. Fi is not about emotional response or depression or negative feelings and stress responses.

I hate to break it to you, but a lot of people in this forum can't get that into their skull.
You might have to repeat yourself, 100 times.

 

[Lex Talionis]

Because having a genuine problem with someone and having people constantly tell you that you are the problem, that you need psychiatric help, that you're selfish or just self-absorbed, or have people stand there acting perplexed by why you don't enjoy or are able to handle the same things they are and being annoyed with you because of it, thinking you're doing it on purpose. Getting too stressed out from all the fake social interaction and forgetting not to be blunt with someone and suddenly you have this crazy asshole standing in front of you getting physical. Getting kicked out of your home because you don't have the energy to play all the stupid social and organization rules of the ESFJ(step-mother)/ESTJ(father) household. Realizing why you had no friends through school because you act weird to other people and they would rather made fun of you and move along then try and understand you. Realizing why your whole life has felt like huge chore because you are cognitively not even close to normal and have never had introverted tendencies supported by parents and peers. Learning to sleep in a car because having an apartment with someone is too stressful since you need to be completely alone and quiet to relax.

Man, the list goes on and on. And so what the hell exactly are you trying to get at? Everything isn't so clear cut. You can't just say "oh, you're shielding your emotions and that's the problem, so take down the shield, durrrr". That's not the problem. That's not the cause. That's just an affect. The cause is that expressing my emotions isn't natural and when I do it is too shallow, weird, and inappropriate to make the consequences worthwhile.

I am much the same way, actually. I was almost exactly like you when I was a teenager.

Now, however, I have studied and adopted philosophies that take a stand and drive me forward, rather than wallowing in self-pity because I lack "social interaction." I freely admit that I really couldn't care less to be around most people whose personalities and thoughts I find simplistic and vapid, and even when I do have the occasional desire to spend time with them, I realize that the feeling is fleeting; once I do it, I feel the need to recharge by spending time alone for days at a time. Then again, my introversion is almost always 100, and I have never seen it fall below 90.

That is not to say that I lack the desire to "succeed" (quite the opposite) in society, but of course, "success" is defined by myself, and not based on modern society's superficial strive for materialism and glamourization.

 

[onemoretime]

I am much the same way, actually. I was almost exactly like you when I was a teenager.

Now, however, I have studied and adopted philosophies that take a stand and drive me forward, rather than wallowing in self-pity because I lack "social interaction." I freely admit that I really couldn't care less to be around most people whose personalities and thoughts I find simplistic and vapid, and even when I do have the occasional desire to spend time with them, I realize that the feeling is fleeting; once I do it, I feel the need to recharge by spending time alone for days at a time. Then again, my introversion is almost always 100, and I have never seen it fall below 90.

That is not to say that I lack the desire to "succeed" (quite the opposite) in society, but of course, "success" is defined by myself, and not based on modern society's superficial strive for materialism and glamourization.

Congratulations. 100 million years from now, your existence will have still been inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.

 

[Lex Talionis]

Congratulations. 100 million years from now, your existence will have still been inconsequential in the grand scheme of things.

This is fully known to me (although I'm not sure if it will be 100 million years from now, or more or less), but I will take what I can get. I would rather my name live on for several centuries than being forgotten a decade after my death.

I focus on marking human history, not geologic or cosmic.

 

[simulatedworld]

You're being foolish. If I took you and strapped you to a board and slowly chainsawed off one of your arms and you screamed and cried and begged and pleaded against it, I could also say "Fi?" You're abusing the psychology of Jung and MBTI. Fi is not about emotional response or depression or negative feelings and stress responses.

Actually, introverted judgment is far more protective of its feelings/thoughts than extroverted judgment because it makes a point of not allowing external influence to change it. Introverted Feeling, especially, prompts FPs to "guard" their true feelings from any external influence in terms of staying true to what feels important to them. (Ti is similarly protective of ideas.)

Your chainsaw example has nothing to do with this at all and makes no sense whatsoever in this context. Fi (as opposed to Fe) is associated with protecting one's personal feelings because it's concerned with maintaining pure and personal values uninfluenced by external standards.

Fe, on the other hand, considers changing one's feelings to adapt to those of others a much more reasonable and normal process, so Fe's feelings are much less "protected" in this way as the point of Fe is to make one's feelings adaptable to those of others.

I am much the same way, actually. I was almost exactly like you when I was a teenager.

Which was...what, a month ago?

 

[Lex Talionis]

Which was...what, a month ago?

I meant a teenager of high school age.

 

[Ginkgo]

This is fully known to me (although I'm not sure if it will be 100 million years from now, or more or less), but I will take what I can get. I would rather my name live on for several centuries than being forgotten a decade after my death.

I focus on marking human history, not geologic or cosmic.

Humans don't care for reason, but they'll rejoice for a good miracle.

But you can never distinguish between a miracle and an abomination. The walking of the dead. The monkey's paw.

We all know that names are best remembered for their negative connotations. The implicit meaning of the name lies within the connotation.

If I were you, I wouldn't go raising the dead or razing an army; lest your name be remembered for the stitching of abominations.

ps- Posting on an obscure personality forum to mark human history is like trying to alter the tides of the ocean by shooting at the moon with a revolver.

 

[SillySapienne]

This is fully known to me (although I'm not sure if it will be 100 million years from now, or more or less), but I will take what I can get. I would rather my name live on for several centuries than being forgotten a decade after my death.

I focus on marking human history, not geologic or cosmic.

how about working on being a good person, good to yourself, and good to others, and by others, I mean those that you care about.

and by being good, i mean finding what you're passionate about, and if what your passionate about is innovative, effecting change one act at a time.

you can't strive to be eminent, you can only strive to become/evolve into that which you're destined to be.

Be you a writer, a bellboy, a teacher, or an accountant.

Hopefully, we all can in some way, be it big or small, help contribute to making human existence, both current and future, a better experience, which of course entails making the world we live in a better place.