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  1. #11
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    I'll be honest, my politics and my religious beliefs, they are pretty strong, pretty sure they would transcend heaven, hell, wrath of angels and cenobites, life or death kind of strong.

    As a result, and none of you are going to believe this shit, I've learned to keep them to myself for the most part and seldom actually share them, if at at never completely or in the whole. I've gotten even better over the years, I know you'll laugh but anyway, at keeping all that to myself too.

    The journals I have filled. Its like Se7en or something.

  2. #12
    Talk to me. Merced's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SurrealisticSlumbers View Post
    Is it a good idea to admit to first-degree relatives who are religious that you are a humanist, or "spiritual rather than religious"?

    Has anyone here done this? How'd it go?
    If your family is willing to respect you less over something so theoretical, then who gives a shit about them? I would tell them regardless of what I expected the outcome to be because the last thing I need is people who supposedly care about me hovering such a lame requirement for their love over my head. Especially if they're old.

    Edit: And if you want to tell them, then that basic desire for them to know validates you telling them. You don't need any special reasoning, you don't need to butter them up first, you don't need shit else. There's a lot of things in this world that will try to silence your opinion, the possibility of hurting someone's feelings should not be one. There's no reason not to tell them or take this to the grave.
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  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Merced View Post
    If your family is willing to respect you less over something so theoretical, then who gives a shit about them? I would tell them regardless of what I expected the outcome to be because the last thing I need is people who supposedly care about me hovering such a lame requirement for their love over my head. Especially if they're old.

    Edit: And if you want to tell them, then that basic desire for them to know validates you telling them. You don't need any special reasoning, you don't need to butter them up first, you don't need shit else. There's a lot of things in this world that will try to silence your opinion, the possibility of hurting someone's feelings should not be one. There's no reason not to tell them or take this to the grave.
    I think that's unfortunate that you feel that way, for some people its a matter much more than "so theoretical", there can be huge implications involved and a sense of betrayal of A LOT besides any really felt terror that they could be tempting fate, divine wrath/indifference.

    I've seen your other posts, so I dont want to fall out about this and also know your posting comes from a well intended place, in all likelihood a desire to challenge human, all too human, bigotry but I'd just say that sometimes deep seated concern about someones beliefs comes from a place of seep seated care and not any sort of wish to control. I'd also say that there's nothing wrong with choosing not to visit hurt upon loved ones either.

    Though there I go mouthing off with stuff I should keep to myself again. And it being all of two or three posts since I said I wouldnt.

  4. #14
    Guardian of Ga'Hoole Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
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    My parents are apathetic Catholics and Jews. Ironically, it's a bigger issue for them that my sister has become religious.
    A path is made by walking on it.

    -Zhuangzi



  5. #15
    Talk to me. Merced's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Survive & Stay Free View Post
    I think that's unfortunate that you feel that way, for some people its a matter much more than "so theoretical", there can be huge implications involved and a sense of betrayal of A LOT besides any really felt terror that they could be tempting fate, divine wrath/indifference.

    I've seen your other posts, so I dont want to fall out about this and also know your posting comes from a well intended place, in all likelihood a desire to challenge human, all too human, bigotry but I'd just say that sometimes deep seated concern about someones beliefs comes from a place of seep seated care and not any sort of wish to control. I'd also say that there's nothing wrong with choosing not to visit hurt upon loved ones either.

    Though there I go mouthing off with stuff I should keep to myself again. And it being all of two or three posts since I said I wouldnt.
    You're definitely right in that the family's disapproval could be coming from a non-malicious place. Even so, the family should respect the decision no matter what. (Then again, I do have a big chip on my shoulder in regards to family, so it's probably smart to take my advice about it with a grain of salt.)
    I am currently looking for someone to give me an in depth typing. Willing to pay money.

  6. #16
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    Not so long ago we lived in the same village all our lives and travelled nowhere and so it was easy to take our religion for granted. But once we started to travel over the whole earth, we discovered there are many different religions. We still try and take our religion for granted, but discovering many incompatible religions and religious beliefs, it is more difficult to take our religion for granted. But we keep on trying, we keep on doing the same thing, hoping for a different result.
    Likes SurrealisticSlumbers liked this post

  7. #17

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    I generally find the more ‘religious’ a person is the more rigid and intolerant they are. It does depend on the individual and the religion however. Be wary of anyone who is really fervent about it ie lives and breathes it. Anyone who lives and breathes something isn’t just devoted, they’re obsessed.
    Likes SurrealisticSlumbers liked this post

  8. #18

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    If a relative asks me where my beliefs are, I will tell them regardless if potential fallout. Why? Because they asked. If they didn't want to know or are not prepared for the answer, then the fault is on them not me. I don't talk about my beliefs with family members though unless I know they are on the same page. If it's a casual conversation I usually won't speak up unless they say something sexist, racist, wrong, etc. I would also speak up if they attempted to get me to say or do something that would cause me to be dishonest, but that never happens.

    I became atheist in my early 20's, and fairly quickly went out of my way to tell my parents (only child). My father is agnostic, so he didn't particularly care but had no interest in discussing my belief details. My mother is very new age and ultimately took it poorly and is not capable of respecting the boundaries I have set. As such, I keep her at a firm distance.

  9. #19
    Armchair Explorer Doctor Anaximander's Avatar
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    IME it never ends well because they just assume I am not a believer because I must be angry. Any attempt at discussion tends to be met with “why are you angry?” no matter how calm and logical I am


  10. #20
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    Religion is entrancing, while reason is logical.

    Religion and reason are chalk and cheese.

    So the religious and the logical talk past each other.

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