What do you think about this? Is it a recent development or does each generation go through a version of this? Have you gone through a version of this? Do you think you're ever likely to go through a version of this? Is the majority of human effort throughout human history about the "Denial of Death" (I've been reading the famous book of that title and found it has more to do with the author's love of Otto Rank and musings about the hero and heroic in human history than it has to do with what I expected from reading the title or wikis about it)? Is everything merely a distraction or diversion from the inevitability of the deaths of loved ones and then the death of your self?
Fear of death is an amygdalic response, one of a simple set of survival mechanisms hard-coded into most complex organisms. Rationalizing or dramatizing basic fears (like fear of violent death, for instance) can lead to acceptance of the inevitability of death, or as the latter, elaborate and avoid one of the most essential conditions of life, besides reproducing, loving, or birth and childhood. Rationalizing fears is essential to experiencing fulfilling life, much like cognitive behavioral therapy redirects self-talk and self-trains inner dialogue to overcome or make less relevant personal anxieties. The often cited patient SM-046, who experienced none of the ancient heritage of genetically inherited fears due to Urbach-Wiethe disorder, did not have instinctual emotional responses related to threat of violence, fear of snakes or spiders, or situations of impending doom. This extreme example is useful to illustrate that basic fears and those that manifest as persistent anxieties are unconscious, an outgrowth of the body natural - because the absence is not only alien comparatively, but shows in stark highlight like an x-ray that conscious, rational thought is measured and deliberated on a scale of life experience and basic, instinctual fears. The fear response of a low-order organism like a starfish or urchin is neural and dictated by sensory pain or extremes of temperature, while fear of death for humans, elephants, orangutans - species with identities and persistent sense of self buried deep in longterm memory - is also survival instinct, but further: commitment to emotional relationships, desire to persist, memory and connection to previous generations, desire to enjoy eating, sex, love, leisure, purpose.
It could be argued that civilization in earlier eras fixated on the monumental project of denying death's cold grasp. In myth, Gilgamesh's search for eternal life after Enkidu's death or Odysseus' katabasis to consult Tiresias, on survival of kingly egos - or massive funerary complexes in the Americas, Egypt, Levant, and China to replicate in undeath the luxuries and kingly purpose of mortal living for a perpetual afterlife make corporeal the uncertainty of death in monomyths and monoliths. A cynical interpretation of idealism in the modern era however, is very much "the word was made flesh," or spirit and purpose assigned, earned, and rewarded is soul (read in post-modern: mind) striving for return to its divine origin - and escape from its earthly roots. In contrast, spiritual traditions that emphasize cyclic, vaguely materialist interpretations of reality define individual life, ego as destined to end (and either be reborn, or redirected into other life) i.e. mindfulness in Buddhism, wuwei in Daoism, loose social and panspecies categorizations of cultures living closely with their food sources and environments and mind, living moment to moment, and death are phenomena of metaphysical experience. Fear of death is so intense and pervasive across human species because of the nature of lingual consciousness and its outgrowth of symbology (written language, concepts, labeling) and the oral, inherited, taught or imitative function of culture reinforce the beautiful, horrific, enlightening interpretations of life and death in art, song, architecture, language. Despite all of this, assigning meaning to existence is the paramount role of conscious life, coming even before survival and valuation of sensory phenomena, though those qualities factor into life's meaning interchangeably. I'm reminded of a famous and equally relevant (also very silly) quote by Douglas Adams, "There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable." Just so, fear of death is an early warning system not meant to be dwelt on in a downward spiral of deconstructive navel-gazing, just heeded and owned as a body process - and its end, accepted.
My personal favorite poem that explores the feelings of sorrow, regret, and happiness of this condition is best expressed in Edgard Guest's poem "To All Parents." I think that my own experiences with different generations in my own family (my grandfather outliving his wife, all of his siblings, and all of his nieces and nephews) and seeing so many younger members grow up around me and oldsters passing on, the message of finality, the unpredictability of life resonates with my younger self and what I've learned over time.
"I'll lend you for a while a child of mine," He said.
"For you to love the while she lives and mourn for when she's dead.
It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or three,
But will you, till I call her back, take care of her for me?
She'll bring her charms to gladden you, and should her stay be brief,
You'll have her lovely memories as solace for your grief."
"I cannot promise she will stay; since all from earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there I want this child to learn.
I've looked the wide world over in My search for teachers true
And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes I have chosen you.
Now will you give her all your love, not think the labor vain,
Nor hate Me when I come to call to take her back again?"
"I fancied that I heard them say, "Dear Lord, Thy will be done!
For all the joy Thy child shall bring, the risk of grief we run.
We'll shelter her with tenderness, we'll love her while we may,
And for the happiness we've known, forever grateful stay;
But should the angels call for her much sooner than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes and try to understand!"