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  1. #21
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    I live for the amount of effort and distress it would take me to die, or in Typological terms, I live because I'm a 9w1 and that's just how it's been, me drifting along the wind currents like a Jellyfish... er... a winged jellyfish. (wouldn't wanna be an actual jellyfish because water is mysterious and scary and makes me feel claustrophobic.)

    There's nothing I'd die for with a strong sense of honor, because I don't attach myself to anything. But I could die for anyone given that they their life has more purpose and opportunity (to enjoy their own life and/or positively influence others' wellbeing) than my own.
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  2. #22
    corona Hawthorne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cloudpatrol View Post
    Good point @Hitoshi-San! I know many who fit this bill also.

    - - - Updated - - -



    Do you say "at present" to leave open the possibility @Sinclair?
    cant see the future.
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  3. #23
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
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    Our Intelligence Service tells us there are a considerable number who are presently planning to die for Allah, and take many of us with them.

    This is hard to believe in a secular society based on enjoying life.

    It is hard for a life enhancing society to understand a culture of death.

    But they tell us to our faces, we love death, as you love life.
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  4. #24
    Senior Member Babybop's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cloudpatrol View Post
    1st @EliaBlack I am sorry for the current feeling of absence. The way you describe it sounds crushing and I am sorry for the experience. It means much to me that I am not the only one having thoughts on the topic.

    May I ask, do you mean then that you have found the earlier pursuits of dominant/submissive relationships and hierarchy to be ultimately lacking in providing purpose?
    Aw thanks I'm glad someone understands. I'm not usually this mopey, but you know, even heartless creatures of hell have bad days.

    I wouldn't say those relationships weren't lacking in purpose. They were great for the majority of the time I was in them. The problem is that one-sided admiration always turns into something bad. When you devote your life to someone, they eventually start to take you for granted. I know I'm getting way too personal here, but after the fourth time it happened, I knew I was doing something wrong. I'd rather have nothing to live for, than live for someone who doesn't value me at all.

    I thought about getting into some religion or spirituality and I even thought about joining the SCA, but it's just not me. I'm not the type to join a system/organization that people spend their whole lives devoting themselves to. I need to be the most devoted
    Previous username: EliaBlack

  5. #25
    Senior Member ceecee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cloudpatrol View Post
    Sounds balanced @ceecee

    Interesting how many people mention dying for their family!
    When my youngest son was born, he was a preemie and they wanted to run some tests on him. I was walking down the hall slowly as I wasn't feeling great and I saw someone taking him out in his little bassinet. I was instantly there, grabbing my baby and I said - Who are you and were are you taking my child, you have exactly one second to answer me. They never told me anyone was taking him at that time and they never told me where he was going. Overreacting? Perhaps. You don't fuck with mama and babies in the animal world, why do people assume they are any different?
    I like to rock n' roll all night and *part* of every day. I usually have errands... I can only rock from like 1-3.

  6. #26
    Senior(ita) Member Cloudpatrol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chrysanthe View Post
    I live for the amount of effort and distress it would take me to die, or in Typological terms, I live because I'm a 9w1 and that's just how it's been, me drifting along the wind currents like a Jellyfish... er... a winged jellyfish. (wouldn't wanna be an actual jellyfish because water is mysterious and scary and makes me feel claustrophobic.)

    There's nothing I'd die for with a strong sense of honor, because I don't attach myself to anything. But I could die for anyone given that they their life has more purpose and opportunity (to enjoy their own life and/or positively influence others' wellbeing) than my own.
    I can relate to what you said about water @Chrysanthe even though I LOVE water and swimming. I recently was going to place ashes in the ocean and could not bring myself to do it. Even though I rationally do not believe the ashes are anything more than a physical representation of what the person once WAS, the murky depths seemed cold (impersonal) and cruel. I was surprised because I love the ocean, but it was a 'visceral' reaction.

    I found the second part of what you wrote captivatingly intriguing.
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  7. #27
    Senior(ita) Member Cloudpatrol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EliaBlack View Post
    Aw thanks I'm glad someone understands. I'm not usually this mopey, but you know, even heartless creatures of hell have bad days.

    I wouldn't say those relationships weren't lacking in purpose. They were great for the majority of the time I was in them. The problem is that one-sided admiration always turns into something bad. When you devote your life to someone, they eventually start to take you for granted. I know I'm getting way too personal here, but after the fourth time it happened, I knew I was doing something wrong. I'd rather have nothing to live for, than live for someone who doesn't value me at all.

    I thought about getting into some religion or spirituality and I even thought about joining the SCA, but it's just not me. I'm not the type to join a system/organization that people spend their whole lives devoting themselves to. I need to be the most devoted

    Kudos for coming to the realizations and for valuing yourself. It's true, we all need to be allowed 'mopey' days!

    I had to google what the SCA is It sounds like you have self-knowledge. With that alone, you are more equipped than many...
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  8. #28
    Senior(ita) Member Cloudpatrol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ceecee View Post
    When my youngest son was born, he was a preemie and they wanted to run some tests on him. I was walking down the hall slowly as I wasn't feeling great and I saw someone taking him out in his little bassinet. I was instantly there, grabbing my baby and I said - Who are you and were are you taking my child, you have exactly one second to answer me. They never told me anyone was taking him at that time and they never told me where he was going. Overreacting? Perhaps. You don't fuck with mama and babies in the animal world, why do people assume they are any different?

    Smashing point @ceecee Mama bears (human ) are fiercely beautiful creatures and that is integral to our nature. I suppose it is why we collectively respond strongly when that natural affection and protectiveness are missing in cases of crimes committed against children by parents.

  9. #29
    Senior(ita) Member Cloudpatrol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mole View Post
    Our Intelligence Service tells us there are a considerable number who are presently planning to die for Allah, and take many of us with them.

    This is hard to believe in a secular society based on enjoying life.

    It is hard for a life enhancing society to understand a culture of death.

    But they tell us to our faces, we love death, as you love life.
    It is always most difficult to understand the things most opposite to us @Mole. It was difficult for people to comprehend Kamikaze pilots in World War II and neither of the cultural influences we refer to are the first to introduce the idea of dying for a "cause" or even as you allude to - killing for one.

  10. #30
    Senior Member OptoGypsy's Avatar
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    The slaves lives to live, for primitive reasons, reproduce and sustain your genes. The person that has truly experienced life lives by the rebellious motif of why should I live transitioning themselves from the position of a slave into a master rather by the romanticism movement, the rebellion of the Karamazov or revolution through the vulgar means of history. Greek Mythology is the greatest source to becoming self aware and in my opinion the message of Christ is what sustains my existence. People may find it elsewhere such as the sciences.

    The best route may be to EAT YOUR HEART, it is just another unnecessary organ and I've heard that it is great with tea, the brain is also a sizable meal.
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