I often experience this, and I do feel like it's something unhealthy. Or maybe it's just me, and other people feel the same, just never mention it. But here's the deal:
I often feel "artificially" over-conscious about the "natural" world and "natural" phenomenon. And the deeper I dive into my "over-conscious" state, the closer I come to doubting natural phenomenon and even to doubting my own ability to breathe or exist.
The way this expresses itself, is that I often end up feeling puzzled about how people can do these and those things, without putting any conscious effort into it.
The way this manifests itself, is for example:
Phenomenon: A person jumps up and starts shouting because he was verbally attacked and offended.
My mental response #1: But how does the verbal/auditory information that was projected at him, produce a physical reaction in the form of him jumping up and shouting? Did he consciously process that auditory information and decide to consciously trigger his physical reaction, or did it happen automatically/instinctively, because nature made him react this way, without his own conscious consent? If so, then to what extent should we be allowed to consider ourselves conscious?
This train of thought may be interrupted by another phenomenon:
Phenomenon: The person's girlfriend approaches him, hugs him and kisses him to calm him down.
My mental response #2: Was that complex series of physical actions she just did a consciously well-calculated initiative, or did she do it instinctively, not really consciously in control of her actions? If so, to what extent are other people conscious or unconscious of the things they do, in comparison to me?
This train of thought then may lead to:
Phenomenon: I start comparing the levels of "consciousness" in my behavior to the levels of "consciousness" in the behavior of others. And I always, for whatever reason, come to the conclusion that I am more conscious than them, because every single action I do tends to be consciously and carefully calculated as opposed to spontaneous.
My mental response #3: But if I'm more conscious of my physical behavior than others, does this mean I am also more conscious of basic autonomous functions, like breathing or heart-beating?
This is when slight panic starts to set in, because I start honestly feeling like my autonomous functions breathing/heartbeat/etc will fail or stop working if my consciousness becomes over-conscious.
I actually had an anxiety a few years ago, which caused me to forget how to swallow food. I spent 3 whole months choking on food, every meal lasted at least 3 hours, with me spending roughly 5 minutes to build up the courage to swallow every next bite. In 60-70% of cases my attempts to swallow almost caused me to choke. I felt extremely over-conscious of the autonomous function of swallowing to the point that it stopped working.
I later discovered that I can "fix" this problem by drinking a bit of alcohol before each meal. And the anxiety eventually disappeared.
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Anyone got any ideas what functions could be causing this?
I often feel "artificially" over-conscious about the "natural" world and "natural" phenomenon. And the deeper I dive into my "over-conscious" state, the closer I come to doubting natural phenomenon and even to doubting my own ability to breathe or exist.
The way this expresses itself, is that I often end up feeling puzzled about how people can do these and those things, without putting any conscious effort into it.
The way this manifests itself, is for example:
Phenomenon: A person jumps up and starts shouting because he was verbally attacked and offended.
My mental response #1: But how does the verbal/auditory information that was projected at him, produce a physical reaction in the form of him jumping up and shouting? Did he consciously process that auditory information and decide to consciously trigger his physical reaction, or did it happen automatically/instinctively, because nature made him react this way, without his own conscious consent? If so, then to what extent should we be allowed to consider ourselves conscious?
This train of thought may be interrupted by another phenomenon:
Phenomenon: The person's girlfriend approaches him, hugs him and kisses him to calm him down.
My mental response #2: Was that complex series of physical actions she just did a consciously well-calculated initiative, or did she do it instinctively, not really consciously in control of her actions? If so, to what extent are other people conscious or unconscious of the things they do, in comparison to me?
This train of thought then may lead to:
Phenomenon: I start comparing the levels of "consciousness" in my behavior to the levels of "consciousness" in the behavior of others. And I always, for whatever reason, come to the conclusion that I am more conscious than them, because every single action I do tends to be consciously and carefully calculated as opposed to spontaneous.
My mental response #3: But if I'm more conscious of my physical behavior than others, does this mean I am also more conscious of basic autonomous functions, like breathing or heart-beating?
This is when slight panic starts to set in, because I start honestly feeling like my autonomous functions breathing/heartbeat/etc will fail or stop working if my consciousness becomes over-conscious.
I actually had an anxiety a few years ago, which caused me to forget how to swallow food. I spent 3 whole months choking on food, every meal lasted at least 3 hours, with me spending roughly 5 minutes to build up the courage to swallow every next bite. In 60-70% of cases my attempts to swallow almost caused me to choke. I felt extremely over-conscious of the autonomous function of swallowing to the point that it stopped working.
I later discovered that I can "fix" this problem by drinking a bit of alcohol before each meal. And the anxiety eventually disappeared.
=====================
Anyone got any ideas what functions could be causing this?
