Se as potentially "scary"? (For those that aren't Se doms or in their aux position)

[Dreamer]

Se as potentially "scary"? (For those that aren't Se doms or in their aux position)

If I just try hard enough, ok, actually really hard, I feel I can experience Se, basically, removing all attachment and preconceived notions about an environment or object, and experiencing it as a blog of shapes, detail, and color and not as a collective whole that has some deeper significance. I realize this may just be what I understand Se to be, but nonetheless, this experience has the potential to make for a very unsettling experience.

The only way for me to achieve this nirvana of pure unadulterated objectification is when I enter a completely new environment, or sometimes, I can sit in front of something, literally staring at it, and somehow magically see it for what it is, but that's just pure witchcraft there, and I can't do it for every object. So for example, I noticed that when I went into the interview for my current job, the office, the people, the whole experience, was my version of "Se". The reason I say this, is because when I see these same people and same environment, after having worked there for just over a month now, has a very distinct feel in relation to that initial experience. This isn't tapping on initial impressions either, that's a feeling altogether different for me. But I recognize this first encounter, as having a totally unique flavor to how I interact and feel about an environment once it has been incorporated into my realm of understanding. Is this objective experience terrifying for me? Probably the wrong word to use, but it can be unsettling if thrown into situations like that for too long. If I can't retreat back into something familiar, get back to people I know, or just any other comfort zone, then it'll tire me out physically and mentally. Now, it's not like every new situation feels this jarring, but I think if I let it, it can. People go into new environments all the time without trouble, and without shaking up their world, but I think it's when other anxieties and stresses come into play, such as an interview, where such experiences are exacerbated and I can't just "ignore" the experience and process it later (which is the mode I usually go about things) Se/Ne eh, tricky waters there since they're both very exploratative in nature.

So I'm curious, when used by those that have Se as a function so low in their stack it's like coming across a doppelganger of a family member (awkward and gross yet familiar), can it be so foreign to you where it's almost "scary" or unsettling??

Because Se is so foreign to me and can be unsettling, I give Se doms mad props for being able to wield its strength and verboseness.

 

[cascadeco]

If I just try hard enough, ok, actually really hard, I feel I can experience Se, basically, removing all attachment and preconceived notions about an environment or object, and experiencing it as a blog of shapes, detail, and color and not as a collective whole that has some deeper significance. I realize this may just be what I understand Se to be, but nonetheless, this experience has the potential to make for a very unsettling experience.

The only way for me to achieve this nirvana of pure unadulterated objectification is when I enter a completely new environment, or sometimes, I can sit in front of something, literally staring at it, and somehow magically see it for what it is, but that's just pure witchcraft there, and I can't do it for every object. So for example, I noticed that when I went into the interview for my current job, the office, the people, the whole experience, was my version of "Se". The reason I say this, is because when I see these same people and same environment, after having worked there for just over a month now, has a very distinct feel in relation to that initial experience. This isn't tapping on initial impressions either, that's a feeling altogether different for me. But I recognize this first encounter, as having a totally unique flavor to how I interact and feel about an environment once it has been incorporated into my realm of understanding. Is this objective experience terrifying for me? Probably the wrong word to use, but it can be unsettling if thrown into situations like that for too long. If I can't retreat back into something familiar, get back to people I know, or just any other comfort zone, then it'll tire me out physically and mentally. Now, it's not like every new situation feels this jarring, but I think if I let it, it can. People go into new environments all the time without trouble, and without shaking up their world, but I think it's when other anxieties and stresses come into play, such as an interview, where such experiences are exacerbated and I can't just "ignore" the experience and process it later (which is the mode I usually go about things) Se/Ne eh, tricky waters there since they're both very exploratative in nature.

So I'm curious, when used by those that have Se as a function so low in their stack it's like coming across a doppelganger of a family member (awkward and gross yet familiar), can it be so foreign to you where it's almost "scary" or unsettling??

Because Se is so foreign to me and can be unsettling, I give Se doms mad props for being able to wield its strength and verboseness.

Well just to be clear, even Se users are going to accumulate more data with time, and add to their current knowledge and perception, so using your interview example, they may get a sense of things - a fairly accurate sense - in that initial viewing, but three months later they will have more data, will have a more complete understanding of the nature of things. So maybe initially, they'll have a 70% read, and 3 months later it'll be 85%, two years in it will be 95%, etc.

Se isn't a blank vacuum, ones' 'read' of a situation is only going to be as accurate as past experiences and knowledge of that area -- so while any Se user will perceive the obvious sensory stuff, the things in front of you and observing what's happening, previous experience will help the Se user KNOW what to pay attention to. And Se isn't just 'oh the chair is red', it can take in all of the complex details as well, so will incorporate body language, knowledge of alliances, any other such stuff that factors into the 'reality' of the thing. So say an Se user who's never worked in an office building, no knowledge of office politics or nuances or whatnot, they're not going to have as good an ability to 'read' the situation as an Se user who has 'been there done that'. Sure, both have the ability to pick up on things and quickly adapt to the moment, are taking in exactly what's happening, but the latter will have an edge.

Just my own take on it.

------

But yeah I think anything we don't really prefer, or like, is going to be 'scary', irritating, stressful, or a nuisance for us.

 

[Forever]

Well I have devil Si and almost about anything stresses me out lol.

I mean with inferior Se I can sort of relate. Things will just be elusive, it'll just be vague. Super detailed photos if i am particularly stressed will just kill me. I mean it's kind of hard to explain, like nothing is actually blurring or disappearing it's just that my mind loses focus on it all.

 

[á´…eparted]

Se is the shit! I love Se! It's so much fun and with just a bit of grounding it gets shit DONE. I make fairly good use of it, but I didn't really start to get it down until I was 21 (I am 26), largely because it's my tert function.

Se does come across as intimidating to many, but that's because it's methods involve throwing weight around, and it often seems careless. It can be in an undeveloped person, but good Se-doms have a finesse behind it. To the untrained eye the finesse won't be seen, because to the user there is no point in showing the finesse unless required.

 

[miss fortune]

ummm... I rarely notice important things like if my clothes are backwards or inside out or if my shoes match one another (my socks almost NEVER match one another because I find that detail unimportant)

I am, however, pretty decent at realizing what data exists that I can see and what I can do with that... and also visualize what changes may do to that at which I am looking (as an example with filling a truck with things... I know that a truck can hold a certain number of cartons and what rate the work is coming in at by watching how the flow is coming down the conveyor and based on what I know is happening in other departments up the line and what's happening in the world at large, so I can tell you pretty quickly how things will fit in the truck in a few hours time based on the data I know and the data I see as well... though that's probably tinged by Ti too). Se isn't all about noticing every detail or living a thrilling life... it's about being able to work with the tangible things in one's environment... and you never get a function as a stand alone thing... the example I used above involved a lot of Ti and a good dose of Ni prediction as well

Se is also the ability to lose yourself in a moment and just experience the world through your senses, but that only happens rarely... like an autumn night sitting in the hot tub alone or driving with the windows down, the music turned up and the wind in your hair... not an every day or even every week occurrence, but when it does happen it is AWESOME

Se isn't scary... it's like the ideas of Ne as far as its usage goes... it merely is good at working with things that can be seen instead of things that cannot...

 

[Jaguar]

Se perceives; it doesn't kick anyone's ass.

 

[miss fortune]

Se perceives; it doesn't kick anyone's ass.

true... it's ME who kicks people's asses

 

[Poki]

SE allows us to kick ass, so does a black belt

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

I like the way I think but I'd probably benefit from an upgrade to my Se and Fe software.

 

[Masokissed]

Se doesn't give a shit about the color of a chair. I don't pay attention to that. I pay attention to eye popping things, like a cool person or a bedroom if it's decorated really really good but not chairs. Se is taking it all in, not focusing on the details of a chair; that's Si. Se is thinking things it can do and Ni thinks of what could happen. So if you aren't careful you can mix it up with Ne-Si, like I did. I've worked a lot on my Ni and I'm good at predicting things and seeing through something in a snap.

Se is like the pop of a bottle cap and all the fizzy drink exploding out and Ne is like an air vent that's always blasting but has an adjustable flow (Si). Ni likes to keep my bottle cold and pop it (Se) at the right time (Ni).

Se is doing something and getting the satisfaction of doing it.

 

[SearchingforPeace]

I like Se. Indulging in Se activites is just fun. I just love soaking in the sensory environment, sometimes just for the pleasure of it, other times for use.

As someone who has always been an intellectual type, I love the very Se jobs I have done, like construction, freight unloading, and metalurgy. I love tree trimming, just cutting branches as it seems fit for the tree.

I love the outdoors, hiking, backpacking, river rafting, surfing, etc. A rainstorm is just glorious.

Driving is a pleasure, especially very fast...

And can't forget sex.....

I have the size to be physically intimidating, but I rarely need to go there, but can. I do have presence and so get Se to physically interact with my environment.

Now, it is interesting how my Se is different from my ISFP wife's Se. She definitely is closer to it and can better see how things fit in the environment.

One example is packing a moving van. I am damn good at judging things and getting things to fit, so I get asked to help people load and move. However, for all my superior talents, my wife is much than me at squeezing just a little more. She is far better at judging spaces (will that box fit in that space).

She is also better at guessing which plastic container will be best for leftovers and such.

And she is much better at aesthetics than me....

 

[Dreamer]

Well just to be clear, even Se users are going to accumulate more data with time, and add to their current knowledge and perception, so using your interview example, they may get a sense of things - a fairly accurate sense - in that initial viewing, but three months later they will have more data, will have a more complete understanding of the nature of things. So maybe initially, they'll have a 70% read, and 3 months later it'll be 85%, two years in it will be 95%, etc.

Se isn't a blank vacuum, ones' 'read' of a situation is only going to be as accurate as past experiences and knowledge of that area -- so while any Se user will perceive the obvious sensory stuff, the things in front of you and observing what's happening, previous experience will help the Se user KNOW what to pay attention to. And Se isn't just 'oh the chair is red', it can take in all of the complex details as well, so will incorporate body language, knowledge of alliances, any other such stuff that factors into the 'reality' of the thing. So say an Se user who's never worked in an office building, no knowledge of office politics or nuances or whatnot, they're not going to have as good an ability to 'read' the situation as an Se user who has 'been there done that'. Sure, both have the ability to pick up on things and quickly adapt to the moment, are taking in exactly what's happening, but the latter will have an edge.

Just my own take on it.

------

But yeah I think anything we don't really prefer, or like, is going to be 'scary', irritating, stressful, or a nuisance for us.

Actually this reminds me of me and my brother since he picks up people's mannerisms and quirks EXTREMELY quickly, and using Se, can determine what someone is all about fairly easily. I, on the other hand, have the same ability to weed the bad apples out from the good, but through my Fi. So I can't tell you what exactly, gave someone away to me, but I just feel it. If I don't let my Ne run amok, my spidey sense can be pretty accurate too.

Good to keep in mind though! About what you mentioned with whether someone has been there done that, versus a novice Se user. That is a crucial detail indeed, in whether someone will be effective or not in certain situations. The function alone doesn't automatically give you some super powers.

 

[Dreamer]

Well I have devil Si and almost about anything stresses me out lol.

I mean with inferior Se I can sort of relate. Things will just be elusive, it'll just be vague. Super detailed photos if i am particularly stressed will just kill me. I mean it's kind of hard to explain, like nothing is actually blurring or disappearing it's just that my mind loses focus on it all.

Ohh possible thread topic, what inferior sensing is like for intuitives

 

[Dreamer]

Se is the shit! I love Se! It's so much fun and with just a bit of grounding it gets shit DONE. I make fairly good use of it, but I didn't really start to get it down until I was 21 (I am 26), largely because it's my tert function.

Se does come across as intimidating to many, but that's because it's methods involve throwing weight around, and it often seems careless. It can be in an undeveloped person, but good Se-doms have a finesse behind it. To the untrained eye the finesse won't be seen, because to the user there is no point in showing the finesse unless required.

Hmm I can see that! Sure, to the untrained eye, Se can seem brash and haste, but I'm sure there is a certain finesse in there indeed! That's actually how I feel Fe/Fi can be in dom/aux users, versus tertiary/inferior users. Anyone can train their feeling function to appear warm and friendly, but there are definitely subtle currents beneath the surface that really allow Fe/Fi to work their magic, which others may not see.

 

[Dreamer]

ummm... I rarely notice important things like if my clothes are backwards or inside out or if my shoes match one another (my socks almost NEVER match one another because I find that detail unimportant)

I am, however, pretty decent at realizing what data exists that I can see and what I can do with that... and also visualize what changes may do to that at which I am looking (as an example with filling a truck with things... I know that a truck can hold a certain number of cartons and what rate the work is coming in at by watching how the flow is coming down the conveyor and based on what I know is happening in other departments up the line and what's happening in the world at large, so I can tell you pretty quickly how things will fit in the truck in a few hours time based on the data I know and the data I see as well... though that's probably tinged by Ti too). Se isn't all about noticing every detail or living a thrilling life... it's about being able to work with the tangible things in one's environment... and you never get a function as a stand alone thing... the example I used above involved a lot of Ti and a good dose of Ni prediction as well

Se is also the ability to lose yourself in a moment and just experience the world through your senses, but that only happens rarely... like an autumn night sitting in the hot tub alone or driving with the windows down, the music turned up and the wind in your hair... not an every day or even every week occurrence, but when it does happen it is AWESOME

Se isn't scary... it's like the ideas of Ne as far as its usage goes... it merely is good at working with things that can be seen instead of things that cannot...

Oh I totally get ya! I always say you can't explain the functions as a single entity, but as viewed with the flavor of its neighboring functions, like a fuzzy venn diagram of color with all the functions sphere of influence blending and shading over each other's territory, and yet, here I am making a comment about singular 'ol Se.

I think that's a key way to look at Se too, in knowing what to do with tangible facts and things in front of you. It may sound "stupid", but quite frankly, it happens more often than not, where I'm presented with all this data and poor me, can't prioritize anything and I just get overwhelmed, so it's a very useful ability to be able to manipulate for the task at hand.

I love the perspective too, "Se isn't scary... it's like the ideas of Ne as far as its usage goes...it merely is good at working with things that can be seen instead of things that cannot". It actually DOES remove some of the scariness

 

[Hawthorne]

When we're focused on the same goal, Se egos are the bee's knees.

When we're in conflict, I'm become less moveable than usual.

Otherwise, I like to watch from sidelines. Sometimes with popcorn and sour candies.

 

[Dreamer]

Se doesn't give a shit about the color of a chair. I don't pay attention to that. I pay attention to eye popping things, like a cool person or a bedroom if it's decorated really really good but not chairs. Se is taking it all in, not focusing on the details of a chair; that's Si. Se is thinking things it can do and Ni thinks of what could happen. So if you aren't careful you can mix it up with Ne-Si, like I did. I've worked a lot on my Ni and I'm good at predicting things and seeing through something in a snap.

Se is like the pop of a bottle cap and all the fizzy drink exploding out and Ne is like an air vent that's always blasting but has an adjustable flow (Si). Ni likes to keep my bottle cold and pop it (Se) at the right time (Ni).

Se is doing something and getting the satisfaction of doing it.

Well shoot, I'm starting to think, at least with the example I gave, I'm actually experiencing Si. Or, at least how I remember the experience. Because I sort of get this "snapshot" of the experience, of everything I was feeling in the moment. Then, when the familiarity grows, that initial snapshot is just sitting there in memory, able to be compared to this evolving version of how I experience the office. Maybe? This extends to basically all my memories. Wow...ya, ok, I'm answering my own question now.

Thanks for listening!

 

[ceecee]

Se scary? No I don't believe so. Se is my inferior function but Se doesn't get things done. Se is what points me towards things like cashmere and silk and wool, heavy cotton or bamboo and burlap. I use to not care much about how I dressed, my surroundings and so on. I realized that these things that I like touching appeal to comfort and peace of mind and a relaxing environment and what I wear impacts how I feel. I decorate my home and dress for me. Even with my Se being inferior, I don't let it stay squished down there, I let it out to play.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

Si gets confused with Se. Si is about taking in the color or detail of surroundings. Getting lost in it. Someone sitting staring at an apple or something. Lol. Idk.

Se is more interacting with it but not deeply as the object itself. There is no third wall. It is what is. How is it similar to what something else feels like? Works like? Similar mechanisms. I can know how this works because I know how that works and feel is alike and there are similarities. Third dimensions verses walls. I don't know how to describe this. This is the best I can do.

 

[ceecee]

Si gets confused with Se. Si is about taking in the color or detail of surroundings. Getting lost in it. Someone sitting staring at an apple or something. Lol. Idk.

Se is more interacting with it but not deeply as the object itself. There is no third wall. It is what is. How is it similar to what something else feels like? Works like? Similar mechanisms. I can know how this works because I know how that works and feel is alike and there are similarities. Third dimensions verses walls. I don't know how to describe this. This is the best I can do.

I can see this. Since Si is way down my function list, maybe Se simply points me towards Si or makes me able to look at something and think about why I like it, how it makes me feel, that kind of thing. Maybe it's why I enjoy is making sets on Polyvore. I think of it as coloring, but better.