[Other] Missunderstood and other things.

[lorkan]

What if people thought of you as an estp-type of person or an intj-person trying to get you in cubes of thoughts that you do not really fit in? Maybe you seem like you have a lot of testosterone in your body and sometimes seem neurotic and therefore you get missunderstood as an estp or a sort of unhealthy subtype? Or maybe you get missunderstood as an intj because some people dont like how you sometimes or rarely speak your mind unless being asked a question and then give an answer that feels like an attack on the other person, unhealthy subtype of intj?

Well i do get the feeling about it and since 99,99% of our population dont know about enneagrams or carl jung or mbti thats how it gonna stay, i believe.

Although i know the real problem lies within myself. And im not trying to be a narcissisist about it, at least not consciously, but i really do want to understand myself better and fix whatever issues im having. I have a medical diagnosis: psychosis (i think thats the correct english word for it) and that cripples me a bit in everyday life. First i am constantly tired even with medication and i cant sort out what im thinking. Whenever someone ask me a question i often dont understand the question or i cant pay attention or lacking in focus. This is extremely difficult when i go to a therapist or trying to do simple homework in school. And chores at home i actually put up on because my lack of organizing everyday life.

Ive seen videos of people having psychosis and i can relate a little although i know that when i think of people talking behind my back or they have a secret pact watching me i can understand that i dont feel so good. But i feel powerless of my own thoughts and mood.

I just wish there was a god that could save me but i feel ashamed, o, so ashamed of my behaviours. And i do get the feeling that other people or inherently angry at me and i personally dont feel trust to anyone in the world anymore.

 

[Noon]

I just came from some e-environment where being general instead of specific & theoretical instead of practical got a few very hostile and combative reactions. They didn't know about type.

A woman once read a personal attack into one of my poems, assumed I was arrogant (seems to happen somewhat often), and answered with a long rant that brutally assassinated my character, my work, and then my existence (yes, even that). Formerly I looked up to her.

Speaking of which - one of my shorts (short stories) was rejected for being too surrealist and gloomy, and I had to overhaul my poetic voice last year due to complaints about esotericism. It's not very useful if it's not accessible, yes?

Those are the first examples of unnecessary stress and conflict that come to mind - minus half of the third, which I guess is just business so fair enough. But I didn't even get a direct apology in the second case.

The little instances of not seeing eye-to-eye with a lot of people on certain things, basic things, are a lot more common. The first time I came back to this forum it was because I was so drained of dealing with those people. One of them, an ESFJ or ENFJ, legit thought Ti was an emotional deficit defense mechanism and tried various times to emotionally manipulate me into greater vulnerability. Ironically though, when I came back to typec most of the old members literally took off... Ay. So I wasn't able to revisit the atmosphere I had nostalgia for, at least not for very long.

I prefer writing because in writing - whether or not it might be you simply have the opportunity to explain yourself in greater depth - there is less conflict.

I don't trust many people either. A lot of the ones I've been close with irl have ended up doing some really underhanded things.

 

[lorkan]

Sorry for replying so late! I was thinking about writing sooner but changed my mind but now i am here again.

Anyways i feel so riddled with guilt and shame since i have such a hard time getting along with coworkers, yes all of them, and i put myself in a situation i cant handle. Ive started studying just to have an excuse not to go back to work. I have no idea what im studying for or what i want to be but i just know what i dont want. My thinking is all messed up so i cant study for more than half hour or something and im behind of almost every subject in highschool for adults. Im so tired constantly. I just know what i should do but i dont have the mental or emotional energy for it.

 

[Chthonic]

Well...I know my MBTI and Enneagram and am happy they are correct for me. Mostly because I've been tested at more than 1 point in my life (and different emotional states) and the types were consistent. But still there are many who do not believe I could be those types because of what I am expressing at various points in time. I'll let them speculate because actually I'm in a very unhealthy place and what I'm expressing is a lot of acting out, repressed stuff and often just straight paranoia. I know I'm not in a good place but I can't immediately be in a better one so I work through it.

I'm not a dominant Fi user but Fi is is dominating me at the moment because my work environment is triggering a lot of stuff for me. And well....I'm in a interpersonal job and so it's hard to be overwhelmed with the interpersonal stuff and have it push a lot of buttons and not react to it. I feel you on this one. Often I find typing not to be useful because it doesn't do well at describing all the various stressors and ways that things can play out when you are not in an entirely balanced place. My mother is a bonafide ENFP who spends all day everyday expressing ISTJ traits. But there is just no way she is ISTJ anything, if you know her better.

 

[lorkan]

Do people really become nicer and more understanding of others problems after they themselves get some sort of temporarily downfall or do people tend to forgett?

I really try to be humble in life but it seems im getting stuck with people who use me and take me for granted. But that is just how i feel and does not necessarily mean that people are aware of that. I could be doing the same thing to anybody else without even knowing it. I really dont know were I belong anymore. People can say as much as they want but where ever i go i feel weak and drained and not fullfilled.

 

[Cellmold]

Do people really become nicer and more understanding of others problems after they themselves get some sort of temporarily downfall or do people tend to forgett?

I don't think many do. But some might. We have super short and rather inaccurate memories I think.

Some are already able to create an imaginary perspective of another's view, even if it cannot ever be entirely accurate it can at least generate enough to approach empathy. It's also why people who try to teach others lessons out of a perceived slight or lack of appreciation are just being judgemental from another angle; they think "hah that will show them" when really it normally results in "that was uncalled for...I'm going to be defensive and deliberately not learn from this...you prick".

It's a kind of vindictive revenge, which becomes less about teaching an important point and more about fulfilling a feeling of schadenfreude.

 

[Noon]

I really try to be humble in life but it seems im getting stuck with people who use me and take me for granted. But that is just how i feel and does not necessarily mean that people are aware of that. I could be doing the same thing to anybody else without even knowing it.

I think a lot of them are more aware than they will let on. The Fe dom I mentioned before, who's become sort of like the archetypical Misunderstander (tm) or whatever to me, was really, truly, actually on some b/s. They told me at one point that they took me under their wing because they wanted me to make them happier (and to teach them about something, which I won't mention, but it's ironic because they started bullying me later on for the same reason, being too "heady"). They revealed one other case like this in the distant past. They always wanted the upper hand and when they got it they took full advantage of it. They were quietly pleased whenever I finally got visibly affected whether for good or bad. They dropped little comments every now and then about how I was "never gonna find happiness" because I'm ["heady"], and how people get bored of people who think and analyze so much, etc. In the end after I'd let them bully me into a certain level of vulnerability, which they convinced me was for my own growth and good, they were still dissatisfied and wanted more. So as a parting low-blow, I got shots like "can you even relate to people outside of your mental constructs?"

And check it: an offer to start over if I agreed to continue it on their terms.

I've never done anything like that to anyone and, being as confused and newly vulnerable as I was, I analyzed it over & over with people I did trust. The consensus was "crazy."

The final kicker with people who don't know about type, too, is that they tend to assume their POV is standard and others are mysterious or exotic or defective deviations.

 

[lorkan]

I feel you guys! Although i actually feel some sort of hostility against me from the world on everyday basis probably because of my diagnosis and that being sick and weak doesnt approve to the sensing world very much. People try to say to me in some words that im not as sick as i think i am or insulting me for being lazy. Maybe i am but there just must be a reason for it. Some peopletry to normalize the situation into sensing factors like im not sleeping well enough or i dont work hard enough or i dont give it my all. Im just so exhausted of not speaking the same language as other people. I do believe i live with an entj and istj and they both make jokes and continiously talk or text on the phone kinda zoning me out when i dont do as they tell me to do. And then there are full of estps and istps in my workplace i believe and there was a video that represented well how it looked like in a estp/infj work environment. I met a girl some time ago who i believe was esfp but we dony have contact anymore. I didnt read her very well and she was very bad at answering her phone wich got me secondguessing quiet alot but i am bad myself at answering the phone sometimes mostly because anxiety.