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  1. #241
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    I stand by the fact that this has nothing to do with you anymore. I don't think you understand what I'm saying. I'm glad your feelings are resolved but am further confused by the fact that you would deny me the opportunity to resolve mine when you were given the opportunity to resolve yours. I have the right to talk about whatever I want to talk about. I have explained how it relates to this thread. Anyone is free to engage or not, including you.

    Also, @PeaceBaby you're not obligated to help, and it seems you wanted to distance yourself from this thread, but if you're willing to offer clarity I'd appreciate it.
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  2. #242
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    I stand by what I say too.

    Here are some reasons I'll address so people will think huh @Forever did have something worthwhile to contribute or really related to the thread topic at hand(now I know these are soft ones but I'll get to the darker ones later, maybe should do it in my private blog in fact):

    Taken from: INFJ Strengths and Weaknesses | 16Personalities
    Sensitive – When someone challenges or criticizes INFJs’ principles or values, they are likely to receive an alarmingly strong response. People with the INFJ personality type are highly vulnerable to criticism and conflict, and questioning their motives is the quickest way to their bad side.

    Pretty self-explanatory, I mean how could you not from me? case-in-point.


    Extremely Private – INFJs tend to present themselves as the culmination of an idea. This is partly because they believe in this idea, but also because INFJs are extremely private when it comes to their personal lives, using this image to keep themselves from having to truly open up, even to close friends. Trusting a new friend can be even more challenging for INFJs.

    I don't seem to relate to this too much, maybe I'm private in the fact that I don't even know myself incredibly well.


    Perfectionistic – INFJs are all but defined by their pursuit of ideals. While this is a wonderful quality in many ways, an ideal situation is not always possible – in politics, in business, in romance – and INFJs too often drop or ignore healthy and productive situations and relationships, always believing there might be a better option down the road.

    In this situation I did drop maybe not so much of healthy relationships but yeah sometimes I ignore the present.

    Always Need to Have a Cause – INFJs get so caught up in the passion of their pursuits that any of the cumbersome administrative or maintenance work that comes between them and the ideal they see on the horizon is deeply unwelcome. INFJs like to know that they are taking concrete steps towards their goals, and if routine tasks feel like they are getting in the way, or worse yet, there is no goal at all, they will feel restless and disappointed.

    College and academia are often like this way, sometimes they don't even put the goal in sight, it's just take this class and mow through out understanding why or doing connections, it can actually make it harder for me to learn without the big picture in sight.

    Can Burn Out Easily – Their passion, poor patience for routine maintenance, tendency to present themselves as an ideal, and extreme privacy tend to leave INFJs with few options for letting off steam. People with this personality type are likely to exhaust themselves in short order if they don’t find a way to balance their ideals with the realities of day-to-day living.

    What happens when my options are too few? This happens.

  3. #243
    Senior Member Ursa's Avatar
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    Thread topics like this seem mildly narcissistic, which I think answers in part the main question this thread has asked. "INFJs are so hated (which indicates that others pay so much attention to us). It's probably because we are so rare and possess these unique characteristics that make us misunderstood. Let's discuss ourselves. But only in a manner in which we can call out responses we don't like (even though they answered honestly the question we posed)."

    FFS.
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  4. #244
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    Quote Originally Posted by Meow Mint Tea View Post
    Thread topics like this seem mildly narcissistic, which I think answers in part the main question this thread has asked.

    FFS.
    I would second this.

    I see a self-fulfilling prophecy, not just among INFJs but among any type to an extent - where a thread equivalent to this is started and people "deconstruct" any contrary views in an orgy of pretentiousness.

    I have pointed out that our culture is NF dominated so there is actually nothing special about being an INFJ, especially if you are female. You ladies are the trend-setters, the norm, the status quo today. I am sure that values will change in time, but right now if you've typed as INFJ and think that means you're some kind of rebel, I am sorry kid but you are wrong. Look at the universities, media and entertainment, politics.

    How many special snowflakes, reading this post, feel unstable, precarious, fearful that the fragile identity they'd created is under threat? I can smell your panic from here.
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  5. #245
    fragment Lia_kat's Avatar
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    All of the INFJs I know (real life + online) are wonderful people. Warm, gentle, compassionate, intelligent, wise, etc. My best friend is one and I can tell that at times she gets a little upset if I don't take her advice but I think it is because she genuinely wants to help me/ others. Maybe I'm biased because I'm close to the few I know and I'm attracted to FJs in general, but I can see the positive in everything they do. She does the same with me and we have a strong emotional/intellectual connection.
    "..But my dreaming self refuses to be consoled."- M.Atwood
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  6. #246
    Senior Member GIjade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Forever View Post
    I think it was taken from somebody's head. Somebody who knows INFJ's on this forum.
    “Oh, what a tangled web we weave...when first we practice to deceive.”
    ― Walter Scott, Marmion

  7. #247
    Member BeyondTheGrey's Avatar
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    I'm blaming it on the mistypes. I refuse to say anything more about them.

    Personally, INFJs do tend to be seen as a 'all knowing sage trapped in a young body.'
    That kinda pisses people off at times. They know whats best for the other person, but that person refuses to look at it from that perspective so things get harsh and blah blah blah.
    True story.
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  8. #248
    reborn PeaceBaby's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hel View Post
    As an addendum though, that doesn't mean what I've brought up isn't important or is any less important than what anyone else has brought up, just because even though what I've brought up isn't necessarily true for everyone else, it's still true for me.
    I've hesitated to raise this thread back up but you do have a legitimate point and I don't want it buried.

    But that doesn't explain the intervening posts. I don't want to debate the intervening posts, which is why I'm posting here. I just want to reflect about the trajectory of this thread.
    Where would you like this happen? Here in this thread or your blog? I am happy to help parse it with you.
    "Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "When people see some things as beautiful,
    other things become ugly.
    When people see some things as good,
    other things become bad."
    Lao Tzu, Tao Te Ching

  9. #249
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    I've hesitated to raise this thread back up but you do have a legitimate point and I don't want it buried.
    Thanks for coming back to this.

    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    Where would you like this happen? Here in this thread or your blog? I am happy to help parse it with you.
    In my blog would probably be better.

  10. #250
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    Below is based on my experience with INFJs. Had few.
    1) INFJs think they know best - yeah. Best how to do nothing and be miserable and still do nothing about it. Mostly at least
    2) INFJs think they are manipulative and smart. In fact being really dumb with people, I figure your intentions out immediatelly. Mostly.
    3) Closed to new experiences. If INFJ think they do not like doing something, they won't even try. As ISTP I have this tendency as well but I'm aware and I controll it. So, dear INFJs, I'm aware you don't like to move your asses and do anything more phisicall then 5 minutes walk. But give it a chance from time to time. Maybe you will like it. I do not enjoy philosofy books either, but before I decided that I read few...
    4) Superiority complex. They are always SO special in their own way. At least they say so. In fact they are as ordinary as any other human being. Not better, not worst. Guys- stop looking down at others. Very often it's not like we are SO dumb. We do get emotions. It's just that we do not want to act based on them. It's a choice, not a flaw.
    5) They suffer so much and they work so hard. Harder then others and more then you for sure. I don't know, really. How do they measure that? Or they just have OPINION?
    6) They tend to judge without full data. I said once about a guy that happened to be a gay that he is a pretentious prick. INFJ labeled me homofobic. Yet, this guy would a pretentious prick regardless of his gender, orientation and colour. And I could prove it...if INFJ would let me finish my sentence before labeling me homofobic. Here - not all of my INFJs do that.Only some. So it may be personal and not type related
    7) They do nothing. They think a lot, yes. They talk much about justice. They mix reality with idea. And what do they do about it? Nothing. World will change itself if we just talk about it and feel for it.
    8) They suck for attention. Take care of them! Listen to their feelings while they do nothing to change their situation. They are SO depressed. Be there for INFJs. They are SO caring that they can promiss they will do it for you as well because it is so important. But don;t expect theu would EVER deliver. At least my INFJs are this way. Sure not all of them probably
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