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Would you choose to have a T or F child?

Would you choose to have a T or an F baby?

  • I'm a T, and I'd have a T baby.

    Votes: 44 42.3%
  • I'm an F, and I'd have an F baby.

    Votes: 39 37.5%
  • I'm a T, and I'd have an F baby.

    Votes: 5 4.8%
  • I'm an F, and I'd have a T baby.

    Votes: 16 15.4%

  • Total voters
    104

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
Why not see it as an opportunity to educate someone who you intrinsically (usually) love? Why is he so emo, have you asked yourself that?

He is a good kid, but the reason he drives me bonkers is likely the same reason two enfps don't usually get married. We are both spastic, loud, messy, talk too much and can be emotionally touchy. Living in the same house and sharing the same space means that he drives me crazy. The real challenge when parenting yourself basically is that all of his weak points are your weak points. He has no structure and I have no structure and so on. So I end having to stretch to provide double the structure, which is so exhausting. It's like herding cats if you only had one leg. hop. hop. hop. meow....
 

Argus

New member
Joined
Jun 11, 2008
Messages
658
MBTI Type
ENTP
I'd a have a T baby so that when they need to be punished they wont take it personally
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
3,067
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Silly INFJ, confusing intuition with feelings.

Hmmm...I would say it was a combination of both. My feelings allowed me to trust my intuition. Really, Ni comes down to gut feeling. Not that there was no Ti involved at all, but that whimsical Fe wins out over Ti trying to break everything down. Ti and Ni bump heads and the collision is not pretty.

But in any case, this is exactly why I agree with cascade:

So that's why I really don't have a preference. The actual way the T/F plays out is highly dependent on the E/I, N/S and J/P as well, there's so much individual variance and other psychological factors outside of mbti, and it's just not a rigid system to begin with.
 

Moiety

New member
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
5,996
MBTI Type
ISFJ
We are both spastic, loud, messy, talk too much and can be emotionally touchy.

No offense but do you know any other ENFPs in real life? I can see messy, spastic even...but the rest...

Maybe I'm just different from other ENFPs but I don't relate at all.
 

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
No offense but do you know any other ENFPs in real life? I can see messy, spastic even...but the rest...

Maybe I'm just different from other ENFPs but I don't relate at all.

I work with two. One sits down the way from me and is more neurotic than me. She gets crazy amounts of stuff done but is so sensitive that she apologizes when she can't do me favors that I request of her. I adore her but she is high strung, chipper, chatters (just like me) and needs lots of alone time and sees a shrink once a week.

Another is a sales guy who I do dearly love but between the two of us we never shut up and our conversation weaves so randomly that it can be hard to keep things on track. His NT customers love him though.

Another was here and again she never, ever stopped talking. She was also in counseling and was looking for a drastic career change. We had a four hour conversation one day and must have covered hundreds of topics. I adored her, however she was in our tech support group and could not handle the nastiness of the other folks there as they were constantly at each other's throat and she was so stressed she quit.

I mean maybe these are just enfps in science though. Maybe the ones in the real world are more normal?
 

Bubbles

See Right Through Me
Joined
Mar 13, 2009
Messages
1,037
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
I'd like an F, only because I tend to be the more passive person in T-and-F relationships. Which, when a parent, isn't exactly the best thing. ;)
 

Moiety

New member
Joined
Aug 3, 2008
Messages
5,996
MBTI Type
ISFJ
I work with two. One sits down the way from me and is more neurotic than me. She gets crazy amounts of stuff done but is so sensitive that she apologizes when she can't do me favors that I request of her. I adore her but she is high strung, chipper, chatters (just like me) and needs lots of alone time and sees a shrink once a week.

If she needs a shrink that might be proof enough she is not a normal ENFP. But the rest aren't necessarily cons. I'm not saying she's crazy or anything but from what I know about myself and the other ENFPs around here I think we are generally very chill. Unless unhealthy.

Another is a sales guy who I do dearly love but between the two of us we never shut up and our conversation weaves so randomly that it can be hard to keep things on track. His NT customers love him though.

Yep nothing wrong with him.

happy puppy;617254Another was here and again she never said:
My reply to that is the same as the first girl.


And not to question your typing capabilities, but, typing people is not clear cut. I never met an ENFP that I know of and more and more I think people are mistyping people they know as ENFPs all too often.

I think there's a bit of an EF bias. People see an F and an E together and they think extroverted emoness or something. And also it seems some think T automatically grants you qualities like calmness and serenity. I don't understand this. I mean, I do. It's a crass misunderstanding of typology (and I know very little about typology) in my opinion. This is not necessarily directed at you specifically but I thought I'd put it out there.
 

sculpting

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2009
Messages
4,148
And not to question your typing capabilities, but, typing people is not clear cut. I never met an ENFP that I know of and more and more I think people are mistyping people they know as ENFPs all too often.

I think there's a bit of an EF bias. People see an F and an E together and they think extroverted emoness or something. And also it seems some think T automatically grants you qualities like calmness and serenity. I don't understand this. I mean, I do. It's a crass misunderstanding of typology (and I know very little about typology) in my opinion. This is not necessarily directed at you specifically but I thought I'd put it out there.

I am a freaking typing machine :)

However it's the N that really shines on all these folks. The converstions will weave all over the place but they are about crazy shit. The crazy shit factor seems to be an N feature. I think I'll start a thread on this in the NF section however as it is an interesting discussion.
 

mortabunt

Permabanned
Joined
Apr 10, 2009
Messages
963
MBTI Type
type
Enneagram
5
I'd want my child to be an INTP, so I could teach them discipline and reason over emotions and weakness. Also, it would be interesting to study a little INTP compared to a big INTP. (I mean ages, sensors.)
 

MuraKoji

New member
Joined
Mar 6, 2008
Messages
89
MBTI Type
LOCK
Enneagram
8w7
Uhmm...I think I'd like to have a T child, because I think they can complete me and I can complete them. They teach me to be more logical, I teach them to be more open to share their feelings. :)
 

INA

now! in shell form
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,195
MBTI Type
intp
I'd want my child to be an INTP, so I could teach them discipline and reason . . .

Where did you get the idea that INTPs are particularly good at discipline? It's the most absurd thing I've read all morning.
 

nozflubber

DoubleplusUngoodNonperson
Joined
Mar 30, 2008
Messages
2,078
MBTI Type
Hype
I would choose a T child..... because every T has emotions, but not every F can think!

*ducks*
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
*kicks noz and repays the favor*

I'd prefer having an F-child, for very selfish reasons. Though I appreciate the mental capacities of a T, and the clarity they can bring, I'd love to be able to share an incredibly deep emotional bond with my own child...and that's where an F shines, imo :)
 

lane777

nevermore
Joined
Oct 23, 2008
Messages
635
I would want a T (and I have always wanted a boy). T because he could turn out into a more well rounded person because of my F influence. I could teach him all the things he wouldn't have a clue about (and vice versa). This way, he would grow into a balanced person and would hopefully have an easier time in the world. I couldn't challenge or stretch an F in that way.
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
19,769
*kicks noz and repays the favor*

I'd prefer having an F-child, for very selfish reasons. Though I appreciate the mental capacities of a T, and the clarity they can bring, I'd love to be able to share an incredibly deep emotional bond with my own child...and that's where an F shines, imo :)

Then why don't you have two or more ?


Just a thought
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Then why don't you have two or more ?


Just a thought

disclaimer: this is all hypothetical as I'm not planning on kids

And I don't wanna do favoritism, that's why :)
 

juggernaut

Permabanned
Joined
Mar 22, 2009
Messages
1,009
I think the strength of the bond you share with your child is the result of the combination of your types (his and yours). I have almost no attachment at all to my one F child, though I do love him. He's almost 20 and for the entire time he's been alive I have been puzzled by his behavior. I just don't understand the way he does anything.

My two younger ones are both T and I have amazing relationships with both of them. My bond with them is so strong that I feel physical pain when I'm separated from them for too long. With both boys there has always been a strong sense of understanding. I find it incredibly easy to share warmth and affection with them. Even the 13-year-old will come looking for hugs from time to time (something that is somewhat unusual from most teenage boys). From the moment they were born I knew they were really mine. My oldest (the F), on the other hand, felt like he might have been switched in the nursery at the hospital. He's a sharp, attractive, energetic, social, and emotional young man ...and when I look at him I think "how can you be my son?"
 
G

garbage

Guest
T, probably. I'll be damned if I'm gonna have a house full of Feelers.

No offense but do you know any other ENFPs in real life? I can see messy, spastic even...but the rest...

Maybe I'm just different from other ENFPs but I don't relate at all.

I've noticed a major personality gap between ENFP males and females, both here and in real life. I'm more like you ;)
 

Shelovesyoumaybe

New member
Joined
Apr 23, 2009
Messages
84
MBTI Type
INFP
I would want a T (and I have always wanted a boy). T because he could turn out into a more well rounded person because of my F influence. I could teach him all the things he wouldn't have a clue about (and vice versa). This way, he would grow into a balanced person and would hopefully have an easier time in the world. I couldn't challenge or stretch an F in that way.

I agree - my thoughts exactly.
 
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