What's the difference between an INFP 4w5 and an INFP 9w1?

[LadyLazarus]

Alright,so my younger sister is quite literally the prototypical xNFP;kind,optimistic,and friendly,the whole deal.I'm pretty sure she's a 9w1 so/sx.I on the other hand feel like I am the opposite,I am cynical,selfish,and can come off as unfriendly.She tends to give people the benefit of the doubt while I tend to do the opposite.

I am very confused about my type,so I thought I'd look into the NF's since they tend to be 4's,starting with one I can directly compare myself with.

So,my question is,is it possible for a 4w5 INFP and a 9w1 INFP to look like such stark opposites?

 

[Firebird 8118]

Hmm... in a way, I suppose. I'll speak from my experience so far: I am a 9w1 (sx/so) INFP, while my companion is a 4w5 INFP (if I remember correctly). When I first met him, he appeared to be cynical and sometimes came off as unfriendly (around others that is, not around me ).

However, as I got to know him better, I began to see that he's just as kind and sensitive (and even romantic ) as I am, with the main difference being that he can't always express his empathy the way I can. I used to think of this as a problem, but now I accept it as a part of who he is - and I love him all the more for it.

So, to answer your question more clearly: yes, it is possible for both these types to look like such stark opposites. Whether that's necessarily true underneath the surface is another question altogether, as far as I know.

 

[LadyLazarus]

Hmm... in a way, I suppose. I'll speak from my experience so far: I am a 9w1 (sx/so) INFP, while my companion is a 4w5 INFP (if I remember correctly). When I first met him, he appeared to be cynical and sometimes came off as unfriendly (around others that is, not around me ).

However, as I got to know him better, I began to see that he's just as kind and sensitive (and even romantic ) as I am, with the main difference being that he can't always express his empathy the way I can. I used to think of this as a problem, but now I accept it as a part of who he is - and I love him all the more for it.

So, to answer your question more clearly: yes, it is possible for both these types to look like such stark opposites. Whether that's necessarily true underneath the surface is another question altogether, as far as I know.

Hmm yes I can relate to what you said about him being friendlier and showing his soft side towards the person he loves.
Not so much the part about empathy though,I don't think mine is very well developed.

...a few more questions,if you don't mind, does he come off as more harsh than you to you? and does he relate to the INFP stereotypes/descriptions?

 

[Firebird 8118]

Hmm yes I can relate to what you said about him being friendlier and showing his soft side towards the person he loves.
Not so much the part about empathy though,I don't think mine is very well developed.

...a few more questions,if you don't mind, does he come off as more harsh than you to you? and does he relate to the INFP stereotypes/descriptions?

Hmm - not sure what you mean by harsh, do you mean just in terms of what he says or something else?

As for INFP stereotypes/descriptions, I guess he relates to that in a way. From what I believe we share in common, we're both rather uncomfortable in social situations, were seen as odd by our classmates in high school or earlier, and are/can be quite emotional.

 

[LadyLazarus]

Hmm - not sure what you mean by harsh, do you mean just in terms of what he says or something else?

As for INFP stereotypes/descriptions, I guess he relates to that in a way. From what I believe we share in common, we're both rather uncomfortable in social situations, were seen as odd by our classmates in high school or earlier, and are/can be quite emotional.

As in his outlook on the world,does he try to see it for all it's harshness and reality?
Also,when does his idealism become evident?

hmm yeah I can relate to that kind of.

 

[Firebird 8118]

As in his outlook on the world,does he try to see it for all it's harshness and reality?
Also,when does his idealism become evident?

hmm yeah I can relate to that kind of.

Ah, I see. This is something I'm not entirely sure about now, to be honest. But given that he tends to be more cynical about the world than I am at times, I think that may be true.

 

[Redbone]

So,my question is,is it possible for an 4w5 INFP and an 9w1 INFP to look like such stark opposites?

Yeah...they can appear totally different.

4w5 INFP can appear as detached, hard, remote, and private as INTPs (may even mistake themselves for one).
Harder to get to know and have a lot more armor around them than 9s tend to.
Tend to be much more intense, melancholy, and emotionally volatile than 9s.
Not afraid of digging into dark, disturbing stuff or anger.
Not as conflict-averse as a 9.
Less likely to care whether others approve or like them.


9s can be detached, too, but they tend to softly withdraw like somebody tiptoeing out and very quietly shutting the door.
Stereotypes of INFPs probably come from 9w1.
More likely to express positive feelings and warmth than a 4.
Tend to have a sweeter nature but oh my, if they lose their temper...holy crap!
May have more difficulty deciding what they want and taking action than a 4.
More optimistic and easy-going.
Easier to 'read' than 4s.

I've know INFP 4w5 and live with two Fi-dom 9s and this is what I have seen. [MENTION=6561]OrangeAppled[/MENTION] has mentioned the differences between INFP 4s and 9s that went into more depth, I think?

 

[LadyLazarus]

Yeah...they can appear totally different.

4w5 INFP can appear as detached, hard, remote, and private as INTPs (may even mistake themselves for one).
Harder to get to know and have a lot more armor around them than 9s tend to.
Tend to be much more intense, melancholy, and emotionally volatile than 9s.
Not afraid of digging into dark, disturbing stuff or anger.
Not as conflict-averse as a 9.
Less likely to care whether others approve or like them.


9s can be detached, too, but they tend to softly withdraw like somebody tiptoeing out and very quietly shutting the door.
Stereotypes of INFPs probably come from 9w1.
More likely to express positive feelings and warmth than a 4.
Tend to have a sweeter nature but oh my, if they lose their temper...holy crap!
May have more difficulty deciding what they want and taking action than a 4.
More optimistic and easy-going.
Easier to 'read' than 4s.

I've know INFP 4w5 and live with two Fi-dom 9s and this is what I have seen. [MENTION=6561]OrangeAppled[/MENTION] has mentioned the differences between INFP 4s and 9s that went into more depth, I think?

Thank you,this was very helpful.

I can relate to your description of the 4w5 INFP very well.I have actually mistyped as INTP for a bit as well.

Yeah those INFP descriptions make them sound like rainbow excreting fairies or something...that certainly made me rule INFP out too easily previously.

...Seriously considering INFP now.

 

[Firebird 8118]

9s can be detached, too, but they tend to softly withdraw like somebody tiptoeing out and very quietly shutting the door.
Stereotypes of INFPs probably come from 9w1.
More likely to express positive feelings and warmth than a 4.
Tend to have a sweeter nature but oh my, if they lose their temper...holy crap!
May have more difficulty deciding what they want and taking action than a 4.
More optimistic and easy-going.
Easier to 'read' than 4s.

Haha so true if I lose my temper, beware! [Though it doesn't happen very often, so no worries. ]

 

[Arctic Hysteria]

Yeah...they can appear totally different.

4w5 INFP can appear as detached, hard, remote, and private as INTPs (may even mistake themselves for one).
Harder to get to know and have a lot more armor around them than 9s tend to.
Tend to be much more intense, melancholy, and emotionally volatile than 9s.
Not afraid of digging into dark, disturbing stuff or anger.
Not as conflict-averse as a 9.
Less likely to care whether others approve or like them.

This is very true.
Even though I don't mistake myself as INTPs, I do indeed put on my shadow ESTJ at work at stressful times / when I get hurt too much and try to detach myself from my own feelings. To closer friends I often appear like an INTP since I rarely show them my vulnerability and rarely talk about my own feelings. Very few people I show my true self to, and they are the people that have my heart, forever or at certain point in my life.

4w5s are going to be cynical and investigative, definitely! INFPs with 4w5 that have had some negative experience with others in their life could easily appear unfriendly, detach, cold or angry.

I don't know much about INFP 9w1, but I don't think that they suffer from severe identity crisis and self-contradiction that we do ?! No?

 

[Sevlow]

Hi, from what I understand, 9w1 have identity crisis but is less likely to be aware of it then the 4w5. The 9w1 will not bother people with it to avoid conflict and stay positive with others.

 

[Galena]

What would an INFP 4w3 be like in comparison to both?

 

[Avocado]

What would an INFP 4w3 be like in comparison to both?

Well, the 3 wing would make them far more like an ENFP than either.

 

[misfortuneteller]

RedBone is right about 9w1 being the stereotypical INFP. The amount of people that take statistics for the accuracy is ridiculous. Please understand that 4w5, 5 and 8 looks better on paper to 3w2s, 6s and 9w1s which are the majority.

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Edit: Only focus on my posts about the differences because the other posters seem to be biased here.

What would an INFP 4w3 be like in comparison to both?

Alison Goldfrapp and Robert Smith are two INFPs that i'm sure are 4w3s.

 

[Forever]

Damn maybe I am a 9

 

[misfortuneteller]

Damn maybe I am a 9

Nah, you seem like a 4 to me and pretty much everyone on this site.

 

[Peter Deadpan]

4s doubt who they are/could be.
6s doubt what to think/trust.
9s doubt... what to do??? When/how to act???

 

[Forever]

Wow yesterday I was reading the comparison like I was convinced I was a 9. Now today I am convinced I am a 4