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The nasty side of unhealthy MBTI types.

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You have a choice!
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INFJ
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I've learned to appreciate Victor's (@Mole) weird sense of humor that often includes being provocative for the sake of being provocative, if that's what it is :laugh:
 

Vilku

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INTJ
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sx/so
I agree we control our own emotional responses; but as you say in the last bit, it is worth addressing if someone treats you badly. And you did admit that the comments you listed were insults; they just didn't have an emotional impact on you. If someone were to ask the deliverers of those comments if they insulted you, they would likely say yes. It is a completely ineffective way to solve problems, which is why I don't do it as a rule. But I also don't do it because it's just mean.

I want to reiterate that this is not in any way directed at your interaction on this thread; it is only addressing the topic.

I think you mean "nonsensical."

Not necessarily. A lot of research into intelligence has been done, and most agree that IQ is not a comprehensive measurement. My IQ is at least above average, possibly in the top 2%, and I don't think IQ's are all they are cracked up to be.

While it must obviously be said that being "unhealthy" is far from having an actual disorder, I think your categories are pretty accurate in describing the directions in which types tend to go.

[MENTION=15003]Vilku[/MENTION]: I approve of the thread topic, and believe that constructive criticism is usually useful. Typology is useful in helping people grow toward their most functional selves.

However, I think you have been letting some of your personal biases color your assessments. Also I believe that you are in fact ENFJ and not INFJ. You respond to people in the same way as the one I knew. (Given what I said about her that may sound terrible, but I'm not saying you are like her in any of those ways- just that you become defensive when criticized and seem to exhibit inferior Ti.)
Edit: Not of course that it matters. I would be a huge hypocrite if I were to make a big deal over someone possibly being mistyped.

[MENTION=3325]Mole[/MENTION] /@Victor, whoever you are: I mean this as constructive criticism and not an insult: it has been pointed out to you over and over that your responses to people are often out of proportion to what is typically functional and usual with regard to comments which have a critical tone. While it may be the case in some cases that people are insulting you, it might benefit you to engage in some introspection and ascertain whether there is a grain of truth in what they say, and suppress your emotional response. While I will not go so far as to call you "unhealthy" because I don't know you and your circumstances, it is typical of IXFP's in the grip of inferior Te to perceive criticism and negative judgment where it is not.

ahah! i mean, thats flattering, i wish i was an E. but if you were to observe me, then you would quickly realize im as passive as hell, even htough i want to socialize, i dont know how to. like recently, i talked with my entp friend, and i kind of complained how i miss this person, and then he suggested that i meet with him, and i was like "OH." (i can meet people? i didnt know!) xD.. also my sx so energy combined to 4w3 melodrama might give that impression youve got.

but ill try to ponder this subject more, its just that every data seems to point out to infj.
ahhahaah..! my 4w3'ness, its kind of annoying, because when people suggest me that i was another type than who i am, then i start thinking about how cool it would be if i was, and then i really badly want to be.. but of course, these wants dont affect the reality.. -.-

hmm, and im not sure what is meant by the socionics conflict relationship, but i totally conflict with istj's and find it the most potentially dangerous dynamic to myself.

im also often so stuck in my head, that i dont connect to other people at all.

but i mean, this would still be super fascinating if im an enfj, because then i when i understand myself correctly.
i would love to think of all this data, but i find its too frustrating to focus. >.<

AGHF, i just wish i had an ntp friend to discuss these with.. -.-
im not stupid, i just find thinking _rationally_ very frustrating.

i guess the fact that ive never met more than one intp and one enfj, of which, i hadnt conversed much at all, only to conclude their types, so its very hard for me to compare myself to a type i dont even understand.

if im an enfj, then my sx so'ness(unhealthy of that) would explain why im so antisocial. my entp sx so unhealthy friend too finds, that hes sp reserves are so low that he must neglect activities he should do.

Personal insults are against the rules and may lead to banning.

when i red this, i was like: "how is this possible? i thought i clicked the page ten, not one." and then i checked the time stamp, and you indeed had just repeated saying the same thing again! =S

and mole, your behaviour is very isfp, i recommend you to consider about the type.
 

greenfairy

philosopher wood nymph
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ahah! i mean, thats flattering, i wish i was an E. but if you were to observe me, then you would quickly realize im as passive as hell, even htough i want to socialize, i dont know how to. like recently, i talked with my entp friend, and i kind of complained how i miss this person, and then he suggested that i meet with him, and i was like "OH." (i can meet people? i didnt know!) xD.. also my sx so energy combined to 4w3 melodrama might give that impression youve got.

but ill try to ponder this subject more, its just that every data seems to point out to infj.
ahhahaah..! my 4w3'ness, its kind of annoying, because when people suggest me that i was another type than who i am, then i start thinking about how cool it would be if i was, and then i really badly want to be.. but of course, these wants dont affect the reality.. -.-

hmm, and im not sure what is meant by the socionics conflict relationship, but i totally conflict with istj's and find it the most potentially dangerous dynamic to myself.

im also often so stuck in my head, that i dont connect to other people at all.

but i mean, this would still be super fascinating if im an enfj, because then i when i understand myself correctly.
i would love to think of all this data, but i find its too frustrating to focus. >.<

AGHF, i just wish i had an ntp friend to discuss these with.. -.-
im not stupid, i just find thinking _rationally_ very frustrating.

i guess the fact that ive never met more than one intp and one enfj, of which, i hadnt conversed much at all, only to conclude their types, so its very hard for me to compare myself to a type i dont even understand.

if im an enfj, then my sx so'ness(unhealthy of that) would explain why im so antisocial. my entp sx so unhealthy friend too finds, that hes sp reserves are so low that he must neglect activities he should do.
Hm...I don't know. Do you spend a lot of time socializing in alternative ways, like online or playing role playing games? I haven't met too many INFJ's or ENFJ's either; but your posting style strikes me as a bit different than other INFJ's on here. Just a thought. You could just be unique. But the fact that thinking in Ti sorts of ways is frustrating for you points more toward it being inferior than tertiary. Do you relate to inferior Se?
 

greenfairy

philosopher wood nymph
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sx/sp
ISFP's can be very impulsive and self destructive. They are prone to substance use and abuse, and dysfunctional relationships. They express their inner turmoil and rebellion more physically than INFP's.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Apr 18, 2010
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sp/sx
I agree we control our own emotional responses; but as you say in the last bit, it is worth addressing if someone treats you badly. And you did admit that the comments you listed were insults; they just didn't have an emotional impact on you. If someone were to ask the deliverers of those comments if they insulted you, they would likely say yes. It is a completely ineffective way to solve problems, which is why I don't do it as a rule. But I also don't do it because it's just mean.
They are insults as much as a hard, misshapen lump of cooked baking ingredients on a plate is a cake. I would not dignify either with the customary name if it does not produce the intended effect. The wannabee "baker" can call it whatever he likes, but that does not change its reality.

I've learned to appreciate Victor's (@Mole) weird sense of humor that often includes being provocative for the sake of being provocative, if that's what it is :laugh:
I have little patience with his refusal (or inability?) to engage directly with topics and questions. Provocation without substantive content is just hot air.
 

greenfairy

philosopher wood nymph
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They are insults as much as a hard, misshapen lump of cooked baking ingredients on a plate is a cake. I would not dignify either with the customary name if it does not produce the intended effect. The wannabee "baker" can call it whatever he likes, but that does not change its reality.
That's a pretty funny image. :laugh:

I have little patience with his refusal (or inability?) to engage directly with topics and questions. Provocation without substantive content is just hot air.
^Agreed.
 

Mole

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Mar 20, 2008
Messages
20,284
Are you talking about me insulting you or others? And people don't get banned after a few insults. They get infractions IF the mods deem their behaviour against the rules.

We have a whole list of rules but if I condense them down to one, I would say that personal insults are against the rules and may lead to banning.

This is a sensible rule for one insult leads to another and before long we have a flame which is anti-social.

So we might say we practise free speech, but polite free speech.
 

Mole

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when i red this, i was like: "how is this possible? i thought i clicked the page ten, not one." and then i checked the time stamp, and you indeed had just repeated saying the same thing again!

The problem is that when we are personally insulted our first impulse is to give as good as we get. Unfortunately this natural impulse leads to a flame which is anti-social.

And so we have a rule to inhibit our first impulse, and that rule is personal insults are against the rules and may lead to banning.

And indeed the sign of emotional intelligence is learning to inhibit our first impulse.
 

greenfairy

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Unfortunately this natural impulse leads to a flame which is anti-social.

And so we have a rule to inhibit our first impulse
Your impulse to accuse people of insulting you and then say over and over that violation of the rules may lead to banning causes an anti-social flame as you put it. In any case it is distracting to people who want to read about the thread topic. Perhaps you should inhibit your impulse.
 

Mole

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Your impulse to accuse people of insulting you and then say over and over that violation of the rules may lead to banning causes an anti-social flame as you put it. In any case it is distracting to people who want to read about the thread topic. Perhaps you should inhibit your impulse.

Rules is rules.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
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Cellmold

Wake, See, Sing, Dance
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They are insults as much as a hard, misshapen lump of cooked baking ingredients on a plate is a cake. I would not dignify either with the customary name if it does not produce the intended effect. The wannabee "baker" can call it whatever he likes, but that does not change its reality.

Yeah he wants a gingerbread man....he gets a gingerbread dinosaur.
 

Vilku

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Hm...I don't know. Do you spend a lot of time socializing in alternative ways, like online or playing role playing games? I haven't met too many INFJ's or ENFJ's either; but your posting style strikes me as a bit different than other INFJ's on here. Just a thought. You could just be unique. But the fact that thinking in Ti sorts of ways is frustrating for you points more toward it being inferior than tertiary. Do you relate to inferior Se?

UHH.. only all my time. i pretend im doing it for "learning", but ive recognized, i dont really focus on internalizing what i "learn". i just make quick hasty assumptions, and then im happily browsing the next thread. because.. theres too much to learn. =|
sx so's are known for being pseudo rationals when unhealthy, so it definately has to have a part in this.
(i played games too much majority of my childhood, i was so disappointed in other people because i thought i was the only person with feelings, and that they are unbearably stupid.)

and one ridiculous Je dom trait ive observed to potentially exist in me: when i know it, its common knowledge. (like estj's expecting social rules and norms to be obvious.. <.<)

im not sure what Se is, but my idea is that its my sensuality. but now that i think, i think i can be very sensual. but if i dont bother to find it fascinating (using Ti?, then its just bland and lacks depth.)

ive compared myself to infj's, and all types ive met, but it seems like i dont really relate to any of them. infj is the most similar at least. and then the infj's might say how they relate to me, but when i investigate their posts, i realize they are completely different. like Ni doms, i dont get any magical imagages in my mind with hidden meanings. i do have an annoyingly acute empathy thats beyound my control, but thats it.

and when i made threads for infj's, even though i instructed them to give me their theories on those experiences of theirs, they would still just blabber it all out (and in too short) without explanations. intj's too often just expect the way their mind works to be obvious to others.

Ni doms also complain about difficulties of bringing their thoughts out. i have none of that, if i wouldnt mention my occasional flaw of thinking i wrote something i didnt, and it just leaves others all confused! =D

and another (unhealthy) enfj trait ive observed from my old posts is, that im very emotioanlly expressive, but its all very shallow, cause im doing it all out of being in the role of the person i thought i was.
 

greenfairy

philosopher wood nymph
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UHH.. only all my time. i pretend im doing it for "learning", but ive recognized, i dont really focus on internalizing what i "learn". i just make quick hasty assumptions, and then im happily browsing the next thread. because.. theres too much to learn. =|
sx so's are known for being pseudo rationals when unhealthy, so it definately has to have a part in this.
(i played games too much majority of my childhood, i was so disappointed in other people because i thought i was the only person with feelings, and that they are unbearably stupid.)

and one ridiculous Je dom trait ive observed to potentially exist in me: when i know it, its common knowledge. (like estj's expecting social rules and norms to be obvious.. <.<)

im not sure what Se is, but my idea is that its my sensuality. but now that i think, i think i can be very sensual. but if i dont bother to find it fascinating (using Ti?, then its just bland and lacks depth.)

ive compared myself to infj's, and all types ive met, but it seems like i dont really relate to any of them. infj is the most similar at least. and then the infj's might say how they relate to me, but when i investigate their posts, i realize they are completely different. like Ni doms, i dont get any magical imagages in my mind with hidden meanings. i do have an annoyingly acute empathy thats beyound my control, but thats it.

and when i made threads for infj's, even though i instructed them to give me their theories on those experiences of theirs, they would still just blabber it all out (and in too short) without explanations. intj's too often just expect the way their mind works to be obvious to others.

Ni doms also complain about difficulties of bringing their thoughts out. i have none of that, if i wouldnt mention my occasional flaw of thinking i wrote something i didnt, and it just leaves others all confused! =D

and another (unhealthy) enfj trait ive observed from my old posts is, that im very emotioanlly expressive, but its all very shallow, cause im doing it all out of being in the role of the person i thought i was.
You could very well be a cognitive extrovert then, who has not been properly socialized. It's just a theory, but a lot of people have said that they were very introverted in high school and now act much more like an extrovert; I think proper socialization or lack of it is a rather different thing from extroversion and introversion. I've wondered this about myself. The things you describe do sound more like an Fe dom; you go with your feelings about things first, in how they connect to the collective feeling; then you process information through your intuition. Se gives you grounding and raw data, and Ti organizes things (though rather more unconsciously) and gives a reality check sometimes.

If this is true, I think you could use your Fe and Ni in social situations to observe common behavior and learn what is customary and how to blend in; then see how natural it feels and how much you enjoy being around other people.

[MENTION=3325]Mole[/MENTION], sorry if it looks like I'm being mean to you. I was just trying to reason with you. As it failed, I'm giving up.
 

Vilku

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You could very well be a cognitive extrovert then, who has not been properly socialized. It's just a theory, but a lot of people have said that they were very introverted in high school and now act much more like an extrovert; I think proper socialization or lack of it is a rather different thing from extroversion and introversion. I've wondered this about myself. The things you describe do sound more like an Fe dom; you go with your feelings about things first, in how they connect to the collective feeling; then you process information through your intuition. Se gives you grounding and raw data, and Ti organizes things (though rather more unconsciously) and gives a reality check sometimes.

If this is true, I think you could use your Fe and Ni in social situations to observe common behavior and learn what is customary and how to blend in; then see how natural it feels and how much you enjoy being around other people.


[MENTION=3325]Mole[/MENTION], sorry if it looks like I'm being mean to you. I was just trying to reason with you. As it failed, I'm giving up.

actually i do that intuitively. but if i dont know the person well enough, i have to act blindly, and then other reject me for being too crazy. -.-
every person has a different idea of how they like me to be, so my universal mode is just to be charming and open. and a bit silly.

i suppose, the hardest part is connecting personally to them, instead of just being charming and pleasant. cause to connect personally, i must understand the other, and its a HUUUGE process for my Ti.. =|
im trying to learn methods to find it worthwhile and fun to use my Ti.
 

Wunjo

Maverick thinker.
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INFJ 5w4: "Cry Havoc, and let slip the dogs of war."
 
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