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  1. #11
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by SilkRoad View Post
    I'm just curious about how different people/types feel about issues of power and control and how they play out in your lives.

    Are you particularly resistant to the idea of being controlled by others? Do you know why you feel this way? How do you think this plays out with your type (or other types, that you've observed) generally?

    What kind of role do you think power and control play in your interpersonal relationships - family, friendships, romantic, work?

    Do you think you're a controlling person? Why or why not?

    Any or all thoughts on the subject welcome
    I'm not a controlling person at all, I think I was in my teens and in my teens and early twenties I wanted or would have supported more control authorities in the world, like a sort of powerful authoritarianism but I dont believe it would be a good idea or even possible to be honest anymore.

    About control, generally I believe that people who fail to or cant control themselves invite others, such as the authorities, to control them. Self-control is the beginning of individual sovereignty and self-government, which are necessary to any sort meaningful exercise of freedom.

    The most controlling personalities are sado-masochistic in a social, as opposed to sexualised, sense they crave a higher power or authority to submit to as much as they crave a lesser or inferior "other" to oppress. The "kiss up, piss down" personality. These sorts of individuals are more dangerous when invested with power than the predations of the "everyday" sadists or psychopaths. Hitler was just a ordinary guy, when that sort of controlling personality was more commonplace, invested with extraordinary power.

    I dont get into battles for control, although I'm very aware of them, probably hyper aware and I and resistant or aware of others becoming controlling because I generally see it as their exhibition of problems in their character or an exercise in projection or things like that. Often unchallenged it just gets worse, the demands, pitch and needs for control of others and compliance steadily increase.

    I'm very aware of controlling and passive aggressive behaviour in my work sphere, although in others too but mainly in my work sphere, its where I encounter that thing the most.
    All for ourselves, and nothing for other people, seems, in every age of the world, to have been the vile maxim of the masters of mankind.
    Chapter IV, p. 448. - Adam Smith, Book 3, The Wealth of Nations

    whether or not you credit psychoanalysis itself, the fact remains that we all must, to the greatest extent possible, understand one another's minds as our own; the very survival of humanity has always depended on it. - Open Culture

  2. #12
    not to be trusted miss fortune's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    827 sp/so


    I like control in situations... it makes me feel comfortable and happy... if I'm in control I can delegate tasks to people who are GOOD at them as opposed to dealing with incompetent people doing tasks, which really irks me

    if I can't be the person in control, the person who is should leave me to do my own thing as long as I am competent at it, which I will be once I get some practice... as hypocritical as it sounds, despite my occasional micromanaging tendencies, I HATE having someone looking over my shoulder and commenting on everything I'm doing

    At least I'm more likely to be hard on myself than I am on others

    also, I'm a total information whore... I must know EVERYTHING about the situation or I feel somewhat lost
    “The phrase 'Someone ought to do something' was not, by itself, a helpful one. People who used it never added the rider 'and that someone is me'.” - Terry Pratchett

  3. #13
    & Badger, Ratty and Toad Mole's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Quote Originally Posted by Lark View Post
    they crave a higher power or authority to submit to as much as they crave a lesser or inferior "other" to oppress. The "kiss up, piss down" personality.
    We want power and control so we will know what is coming next, we want power and control so we will know what is happening.

    On the other hand, we give up power and control when we want to discover, we give up power and control when we want to discover something new.

    For instance, there are a number of people reading and responding to this post and I cannot control their interpretation or how they will respond. So it is sensible of me to discover what their interpretation is and discover how they will respond.

    And as our sensorium is being rearranged by the electronic media, it is sensible for me to discover my proprioceptive sense, my tactile sense, and all my other senses that have been repressed by the privilege given to the visual sense by literacy.

    And as it is only sensible to discover rather than control, we look back to the medieval mystic, Anonymous, and his manual of discovery called, "The Cloud of Unknowing".

    For we need to unknow to discover.

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