Is introversion really a good trait?

[Lily flower]

I am an introvert and I recently read a book on the good traits of introverts - you know, they have deeper relationships, etc.

But I have always felt like I was just introverted because I am terrified of being rejected by people. It's easier to be alone than to risk being rejected all the time. So I have seen it as an undesirable trait and I have worked hard on gaining social skills to overcome that undesirability.

Is introversion truly a gift/positive attribute? Should I embrace it, or keep working on being more social?

 

[Illmatic]

ur an INFJ the rarest type.

Be happy.

 

[Resonance]

Is introversion truly a gift/positive attribute?

Sort of. The pros and cons are pretty balanced, imo.

Should I embrace it, or keep working on being more social?

Both! Being introverted doesn't mean you have to be asocial. Just stick to smaller gatherings and quieter parties. Or get drunk, that works too.

 

[INTP]

like any other trait, it has positive and negative sides to it.

 

[JocktheMotie]

I am an introvert and I recently read a book on the good traits of introverts - you know, they have deeper relationships, etc.

But I have always felt like I was just introverted because I am terrified of being rejected by people. It's easier to be alone than to risk being rejected all the time. So I have seen it as an undesirable trait and I have worked hard on gaining social skills to overcome that undesirability.

Is introversion truly a gift/positive attribute? Should I embrace it, or keep working on being more social?

This isn't introversion, more like social insecurity.

 

[Fluffywolf]

Also, introversion/extraversion, it's best not to look at it in terms of good or bad. Both have unique qualities, advantages as well as disadvantages. And neither are absolute. It's just that the advantages of being introverted are often not as clear as advantages of being extraverted. For obvious reasons.

 

[IZthe411]

Extroverts sometimes wish they could shut up. Like your brain prevents you from speaking right away? Well theirs forces them to speak up or sometimes jump right into something. Nobody has it 'easy', but as fluffywolf pointed out, introverted qualities can go unnoticed, which may make them seem inferior.

 

[Craft]

Society doesn't like introversion because society likes society(...you understand? Because collective cohesion is necessary for there to be a society?). If you're INFJ, then be careful with that Fe. Create your own values.

 

[wolfy]

Introversion is neutral isn't it? It's just a thing, like extroversion.

 

[INTPness]

Is introversion truly a gift/positive attribute?

Yes.

Should I embrace it, or keep working on being more social?

Both. The goal is not to become an extrovert, but a "comfortable introvert". Comfortable in your own skin, whether by yourself or in the presence of others. Sometimes that's a lifelong process, but that's the direction I believe we introverts should move towards.

 

[Eric B]

This isn't introversion, more like social insecurity.

Well, that fear of rejection is something that often accompanies introversion.
What INTPness just said would be true.

 

[Craft]

Introversion is neutral isn't it? It's just a thing, like extroversion.

exactly. This person is creating his/her own problem.

 

[Such Irony]

You might be interested in this website:

The Introvert Advantage

 

[wildflower]

i've also read that shyness and introversion are not the same thing. that gives me hope because i can work on the shyness (fear of rejection) even if the introversion has to stay. i wonder though is there such a thing as a shy extrovert?

 

[Mad Hatter]

I think shyness / fear of rejection more frequently occur among introverts than among extraverts, but for the E's, it would be an even bigger problem.
If you're an I without shyness, then you're golden - you can interact with people without problems, but you are not dependent on it.

 

[Xenon]

i've also read that shyness and introversion are not the same thing. that gives me hope because i can work on the shyness (fear of rejection) even if the introversion has to stay. i wonder though is there such a thing as a shy extrovert?

Yes, there are several extroverts here who consider themselves shy.

Shyness = discomfort in certain social situations
Introversion = preference for less stimulation and interaction, and more working with ideas internally. Less tends to go on outside, more inside.

They often do go together, but not always, and you can be one without the other. I do think some common traits in introverts cause us to struggle more with it, including the higher level of "mental chatter", which can lead to a lot of worrying about events beforehand and ruminating over them after. Our lower need for interaction can also easily lead to less familiarity and comfort with it.

 

[Elfboy]

I am an introvert and I recently read a book on the good traits of introverts - you know, they have deeper relationships, etc.

But I have always felt like I was just introverted because I am terrified of being rejected by people. It's easier to be alone than to risk being rejected all the time. So I have seen it as an undesirable trait and I have worked hard on gaining social skills to overcome that undesirability.

Is introversion truly a gift/positive attribute? Should I embrace it, or keep working on being more social?

that's not introversion, it's social phobia. and yes, introversion is wonderful. being an extrovert sucks

 

[Elfboy]

I think shyness / fear of rejection more frequently occur among introverts than among extraverts, but for the E's, it would be an even bigger problem.
If you're an I without shyness, then you're golden - you can interact with people without problems, but you are not dependent on it.

that has more to do with N/S and T/F. INTJ children typically could care less about being rejected. ISFJ children are the opposite

 

[Thalassa]

Being an introvert is who you are, there's no reason to change it. Plus you can't. I mean if you have something like social anxiety or you're so avoidant you can't function, yes, that's a problem. But that's not inherent to introversion in and of itself.

 

[Resonance]

that has more to do with N/S and T/F. INTJ children typically could care less about being rejected. ISFJ children are the opposite

um, everyone cares about being rejected. An INTJ is just more likely to rationalize it by saying "I don't need friends anyway, I'll take over the world on my own!" instead of breaking down and killing him/herself.