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Could you fall in love with an INTJ?

maydelle

New member
Joined
Oct 24, 2010
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50
MBTI Type
INTJ
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5
Being an INTJ myself I've noticed that in any type of relationship I've ever had
I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received.

What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
BASED ON THE OPINIONS OF OTHERS ( YOU) ON HUMAN TOLERANCE NOT ME.
 
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strawberries

shadow boxer
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Apr 20, 2010
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947
MBTI Type
----
What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?

please elaborate. what are 'signs of love?' to you? i like my relationships to include affection, sex, talking, going on fun dates - inter alia.

why do you want to be in a relationship if you don't want to give anything? just be alone or see sex workers.
 
F

figsfiggyfigs

Guest
Yes, you'll have to elaborate on what you mean.

I don't think anyone wants to date a frigid bastard.
 

maydelle

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Oct 24, 2010
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MBTI Type
INTJ
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5
please elaborate. what are 'signs of love?' to you? i like my relationships to include affection, sex, talking, going on fun dates - inter alia.

why do you want to be in a relationship if you don't want to give anything? just be alone or see sex workers.

Had a proper good *genuine* laugh just then. Who doesn't talk in a relationship haha. Have you realised for the how ever many years you've been alive that people tend to show their affections in a different way. Why would you assume that I would want to be alone?

'Signs of love' for me would be: doing something I don't like for them, being careful with my words when I'm with them, wanting to impress them, thinking about them constantly and acting like a complete fool around them.

In my opinion love needs to be earned not something that you can just give away based on how fun that person is, their looks or stupid stuff like that.
 

Halla74

Artisan Conquerer
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Jan 20, 2009
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ESTP
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7w8
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sx/so
What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?

Ummmm, how about no fucking way. :dry:

Anyone who would choose to stay in a relationship with someone that did not show any signs of affection toward them obviously has issues of insufficient self worth, which would be horrid for them, and wonderful for you.

I suggest you warm up emotionally and find a real love interest.
 

maydelle

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Oct 24, 2010
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INTJ
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Ummmm, how about no fucking way. :dry:

Anyone who would choose to stay in a relationship with someone that did not show any signs of affection toward them obviously has issues of insufficient self worth, which would be horrid for them, and wonderful for you.

I suggest you warm up emotionally and find a real love interest.


Don't take the question as something that comes genuinely from me and is an insight on my life, it's just a question on the behaviour of people generally. So let's just all calm down
 

Halla74

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Don't take the question as something that comes genuinely from me and is an insight on my life, it's just a question on the behaviour of people generally. So let's just all calm down

(1) I am calm.
(2) Regardless of the genesis of your OP, my response remains unchanged.
(3) Ask yourself that very same question. Does it sound like a good deal? I didn't think so.
(4) I'm not hating, just giving you blunt advice. :yes:
 

sculpting

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4,148
INTjs show love differently from other people. I know the INTJs in my life care for me, not by what they say, but by what they do. They try and look out for me, try and keep from doing stupid things, try and give me lots of Te-nudges. ( You can also see love in their eyes, but shhhh, dont tell them it leaks out all over the place.)

They also get kinda silly and goofy, tehehehehee. It's adorable. and touch..... :)

But no, I suspect an INTJ would never emo-incinerate someone else or drastically externalize emotion. That's okay if The INTJ's partner understands what to look for. That might take some communication at first though.

the generalized question is non realistic.
 
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figsfiggyfigs

Guest
By frigid bastard you mean who exactly.

First of all, you did not elaborate.

Second of all, by frigid, I was refering to those who are FRIGID.
If you feel insulted by that, maybe there is a reason to be?

But just in case you thought I was referring to you. I wasn't, and by your following answers, I don't think you were, however, blame it on my J for me to clarify.

You haven't explained enough for me to make that assumption. I was merely stating that it is unlikely that anyone would willingly date someone who is of a frigid nature.

By Frigid, I meant:

cold, sexually unresponsive,a lack of affection or enthusiasm,devoid of warmth and cordiality; expressive of unfriendliness or disdain

-Google
 

maydelle

New member
Joined
Oct 24, 2010
Messages
50
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INTJ
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(1) I am calm.
(2) Regardless of the genesis of your OP, my response remains unchanged.
(3) Ask yourself that very same question. Does it sound like a good deal? I didn't think so.
(4) I'm not hating, just giving you blunt advice. :yes:

1) I'm happy to hear that... 0_0
2) I already know what my opinion is, I wanted to know what OTHER people's opinions were BTW I know it's not a good deal ........what a surprise huh?
3) Good. I like blunt advice.......although by asking that question I wasn't intending to be given advice because. It isn't defining me........ another surprise!
 

cascadeco

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What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?

The person doesn't show ANY signs of love towards me? I wouldn't be willing to stay in the relationship.

As Orobas outlines, though, people show love/care in different ways. So do I expect the other person to show 'signs of love' towards me in the same way I would? No.. but that's where communication comes in. I would still need to know, believe, and trust in him caring for me, wanting me in his life, and demonstrating that in his own way. If not in words, then in actions.

(It might be easier for me, though, as I'm not a particularly verbal/effusive person, and my expressions are much more in body language, physical affection, and extending myself in helping and wanting to make things easier for them.)
 
Joined
Jun 6, 2007
Messages
7,312
MBTI Type
INTJ
Being an INTJ myself I've noticed that in any type of relationship I've ever had
I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received.

What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?

As an INTJ, I understand this part - "I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received."
But not this part: "a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?"

They're not the same thing at all. I have been in healthy relationships where I show signs of love. But you have to help your partner recognize them (like, when I say "yay" it's the same as when you say "YAY!") But I can't imagine anyone staying in a relationship where they receive no signs of love. That's not an INTJ thing, that's a maturity thing.
 

Donna Cecilia

L'anima non dimora
Joined
Mar 19, 2010
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Being an INTJ myself I've noticed that in any type of relationship I've ever had
I have not been able (or willing) to give back as much intensity as I've received.

This is because you still haven't found a worthy partner.

If I'm into in someone, I let him know. If I say 'I love you', it's for real. And I don't feel like reminding him about it all the time. It is not that I'm unaffectionate.

Although I hate the typical displays of affection, I do express it.

What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?

Not me.

And, I won't be in a relationship with someone who doesn't mean anything to me. Not only because I simply can't give him anything in return, but because I don't like deceiving myself. No matter how strong that person's feelings for me are.
 

rav3n

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What I want to know is how many of you would be willing to stay in a relationship where the other person doesn't show any signs of love towards you?
No. Is caring a secret?
 

maydelle

New member
Joined
Oct 24, 2010
Messages
50
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5
The person doesn't show ANY signs of love towards me? I wouldn't be willing to stay in the relationship.

As Orobas outlines, though, people show love/care in different ways. So do I expect the other person to show 'signs of love' towards me in the same way I would? No.. but that's where communication comes in. I would still need to know, believe, and trust in him caring for me, wanting me in his life, and demonstrating that in his own way. If not in words, then in actions.

(It might be easier for me, though, as I'm not a particularly verbal/effusive person, and my expressions are much more in body language, physical affection, and extending myself in helping and wanting to make things easier for them.)

I agree with you. Can I just state that the question I asked wasn't intended to come across as a question coming from my inner mind just a thought I've been having on human tolerance.
 

maydelle

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Joined
Oct 24, 2010
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50
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INTJ
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But I can't imagine anyone staying in a relationship where they receive no signs of love. That's not an INTJ thing, that's a maturity thing.

The question I asked was about a thought I've having based on human tolerance and other people's opinion on it. If it was based on my relationship than I wouldn't have asked because I already know the answer to that.
 

strawberries

shadow boxer
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Apr 20, 2010
Messages
947
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'Signs of love' for me would be: doing something I don't like for them, being careful with my words when I'm with them, wanting to impress them, thinking about them constantly and acting like a complete fool around them.

that aint love. :wacko:
 

miss fortune

not to be trusted
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as the willing partner of an ISTJ... who is actually crazy about him, I can say that you IxTJ people are funny to deal with :)

he's MUCH more likely to show love through actions and helping me out than through words or presents or anything... like doing things he doesn't really LIKE to do for me and things of that sort (like going out to my work social events with me even though I KNOW that he doesn't want to go!)... Kind of like what you described there :laugh:

Mostly all that's needed is just realizing that everyone's different and that they show that they love you in different way, so yes, even INTJs can be loved- unless they adore Ayn Rand :thelook:

the important question is are YOU willing to deal with other type's quirks? :huh:
 
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