Why are you your type?

[musicnerd93]

I've often wondered why somebody is the type they are. Like, why am I an INFP? Why am I not ESTJ or ISTP?

My thoughts are:

1) Genetics: My father is INTP while my mother is INFJ. Therefore I believe it is natural that I be an INxx because both of my parents are. If I had siblings, one would probably be INTP, INFJ, INTJ, or, like myself, INFP.

2) Nurture, how you are raised I think can factor your personality type. I don't know how...but...maybe... :/

3) Choice. We simply choose to be a certain type of person because that personality is what we find attractive.


What do you guys think? Environmental, emotional or genetic factors? Or just pure coincidence?

 

[miss fortune]

my parents are an INTP and ISFJ and my sis is an ENFJ, so I doubt that upbringing or family had much to do with it...

not sure why I am my personality type... I'd prefer to be an introvert to tell the truth, but I'm not

 

[Tamske]

Wrong statistics. You've got 16/16 chance of being the type you are, not 1/16.

But I've wondered too. Probably I've got the imagination from my mother and the interest in science and technology from my father. Mix and match.

@ Whatever: what's wrong with being an extravert? I'd love to boost my extraversion to the level I'd be really at ease in company. More specific, I'd like to improve my Fe and become a better teacher

 

[KDude]

i have no idea. my dad is ESFJ (but maybe ESTJ) and an old military dude..my mom might be ISTJ.. my brother may be ISTP. either way, it was kind of a tough environment, and being the youngest, i would shy away. yet my dad also got me in sports early, so that may have helped develop "Se". i spent a lot of time outside actually. i kind of remained introverted in school, although i was still playful..just not very talkative. i got picked on (whether it was for my funny looking pants or being asian in white neighborhoods, i dunno) and into a lot of fights. i dont know if that made me more introverted too.

i definitely didnt "pick" this type. the other isfps here keep having to hear me grumble on how it's described (some descriptions are cool though). like, i keep trying to redefine what it means in small ways. instead of letting it define me.

 

[stringstheory]

I think it's a mix of the first two; genetically, we are social animals whose brains are wired to learn and collect the various images/experiences/etc. that come at us through nurturing (i prefer to call it socialization) over the years and store it for later use. we adapt and use these learned abilities and behaviours in order to function within our smaller and greater social communities.

 

[KDude]

nature huh? my mom said my first word was "flower".

i was destined, man

 

[miss fortune]

my personality isn't like that of my parents at all though... and I grew up on a farm far out in the country away from everyone else and STILL was an extrovert

and you WERE doomed to FPhood there!

 

[Arclight]

According to British research .. 40-60% is detrmined by genetics. and the rest by experience.

So about half my type I am born with and the rest develops.

BBC/OU Open2.net - Family & Child Development - Child of Our Time 2010

 

[cascadeco]

I've often wondered why somebody is the type they are. Like, why am I an INFP? Why am I not ESTJ or ISTP?

My thoughts are:

1) Genetics: My father is INTP while my mother is INFJ. Therefore I believe it is natural that I be an INxx because both of my parents are. If I had siblings, one would probably be INTP, INFJ, INTJ, or, like myself, INFP.

Not to burst your bubble, but you're just an isolated instance where your type is a nifty little mix of both of your parents. You could find countless examples that wouldn't support what you're suggesting (i.e. your most likely siblings).

(One such example: My mom is ISTJ, dad is ISFJ, I am INFJ and my brother is INTP)

----------------

Anyhow, I DO believe much of personality IS in fact the result of genetics - I mean, genetics account for much/most of who we are (at least instinctually/chemically/biologically) -- but I don't think the genes are in nice little packages like 'S', 'N', 'J', 'P', etc.. or even Ni, Ne, Ti, Te. Remember, we're the ones who have created these designations/categories to label personality characteristics/trends. The genes probably have different designations or combinations, if that makes sense.

---------------

Nurture: Nurture could definitely impact our value system as well as how we cope with stress, how we perceive the world (cynically vs. optimistically), and other things such as this, and consequently nurture could impact the actions/choices we make. Nurture could definitely account for a lot of external behaviors and values; not as much the internal thought processes.

--------------

And yes, there is an element of choice as well. But, I do think we start out with a 'baseline' personality, if you will - a set of instinctual responses... preferences... and we can then choose to build upon that as we see fit.

 

[jixmixfix]

My dad is an ISTJ and my mom is an ESFJ. My sister is an INFJ and my older sister is an ESTJ. I can see myself similar to my dad but he's way too uptight about things such as being on time and boring boring boring.....being the only P in my family though is frustrating at times.

 

[stringstheory]

And yes, there is an element of choice as well. But, I do think we start out with a 'baseline' personality, if you will - a set of instinctual responses... preferences... and we can then choose to build upon that as we see fit.

Oooh, interesting.....good point

 

[KDude]

Oooh, interesting.....good point

If I had any choice in the matter, it might have been because of one of my brother's friends...definitely isfp. and one of the coolest people i've known. i guess he was an early role model/someone i could relate to easier.

 

[stringstheory]

mmm, i had sort of a different idea of "choice". correct me if i'm wrong casadeco, but here's how i interpreted this part of your post.

humans, as they get older, seem to get very comfy what they know and have learned. Branching out from that life experience, from what i gather, is generally difficult for people. Our brains process selected information while ignoring or avoiding others that contradict that and make us uncomfortable, to various degrees.

Following that, it seems kinda natural to stick with what makes you feel most comfortable. Not to say that no one ever does anything or associates with anyone who makes them uncomfortable, but to say that we start out with a baseline personality (i'd argue develop, but no matter!) and then reinforce this personality by means of personal choice.

i have no idea if that's actually what casadeco was going for, but that's the idea i got upon reading it.

 

[cascadeco]

mmm, i had sort of a different idea of "choice". correct me if i'm wrong casadeco, but here's how i interpreted this part of your post.

humans, as they get older, seem to get very comfy what they know and have learned. Branching out from that life experience, from what i gather, is generally difficult for people. Our brains process selected information while ignoring or avoiding others that contradict that and make us uncomfortable, to various degrees.

Following that, it seems kinda natural to stick with what makes you feel most comfortable. Not to say that no one ever does anything or associates with anyone who makes them uncomfortable, but to say that we start out with a baseline personality (i'd argue develop, but no matter!) and then reinforce this personality by means of personal choice.

i have no idea if that's actually what casadeco was going for, but that's the idea i got upon reading it.

I think you got the gist of what I was saying!

I think you can either really dig into your strengths, and build upon those, and dis-value the things you're not naturally skilled at, OR you can choose to get more out of your comfort zone and expand your horizons and tackle your weaker areas. I think people tend to either become more set in their ways as they grow older, and become arrogant and single-minded in those ways, or they remain more flex-y as they grow older and try to branch out more.

Basically - I think it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking you're a certain way, and you're trapped in those patterns. Not so. Just because in mbti terms you're 'supposed' to rely totally on your feelings (or whatever - I'm generalizing this a lot), doesn't mean you're a victim to that and you can't instead start moving beyond your kneejerk reaction/response. If you choose to, you can expand beyond your immediate tendencies. (Of course there are certain things that are so far from who you naturally are that there's no way you'd become more than 'average' or adequate at)

Neither way is right or wrong, and I'm not saying moving out of your comfort zone has to imply denying who you naturally are. It doesn't have to. I'm just saying you can add elements to who you already are -- you can add skills. I don't entirely buy into the 'But it's just me! I can't help myself!' thing. I mean, think we have our baseline things that we'll always have, no matter what, but we're adaptable as well, if we choose to be. There may very well be a cost to certain choices, but the choice still remains.

 

[KDude]

my type is defined by "getting out there" though. Actually, everyone's is in a way (everyone has a strong extroverted function). i do have comfort levels (Fi), but they need to be balanced. what else am I left with if i slow down from experiencing life? Te and Ni? I would be a hardheaded selfish disaster then (edit: or something lame). which is exactly what some people become when they stop experiencing or assessing things according to their abilities. that's not what you want to do. life is to be experienced, always.

 

[Aleksei]

I'd say my dad's genes plus my mom's upbringing. Mom's an ENFP 4w3, and dad's an INTJ 5w6. I have more or less the same temperament as my mom, but I'm calmer and much more logical.

 

[ragashree]

Hmm... four out of six siblings were intuitives, both parents, and in the next generation, three out of the four nephews and neices who are old enough to type. These are all pretty definite typings, and it's certainly a much higher proportion of intuitives than in the general population. It's also not particularly linked to education so far as I can see. It could just be coincidence though; if not a genetic factor may be more significant than social factors, though social factors may have caused a slight overall tendency to introversion. The same factors seem not to have applied in whatever's case though, so this one is up for grabs at present.

 

[musicnerd93]

Not to burst your bubble, but you're just an isolated instance where your type is a nifty little mix of both of your parents. You could find countless examples that wouldn't support what you're suggesting (i.e. your most likely siblings).

(One such example: My mom is ISTJ, dad is ISFJ, I am INFJ and my brother is INTP)

----------------

Anyhow, I DO believe much of personality IS in fact the result of genetics - I mean, genetics account for much/most of who we are (at least instinctually/chemically/biologically) -- but I don't think the genes are in nice little packages like 'S', 'N', 'J', 'P', etc.. or even Ni, Ne, Ti, Te. Remember, we're the ones who have created these designations/categories to label personality characteristics/trends. The genes probably have different designations or combinations, if that makes sense.

---------------

Nurture: Nurture could definitely impact our value system as well as how we cope with stress, how we perceive the world (cynically vs. optimistically), and other things such as this, and consequently nurture could impact the actions/choices we make. Nurture could definitely account for a lot of external behaviors and values; not as much the internal thought processes.

--------------

And yes, there is an element of choice as well. But, I do think we start out with a 'baseline' personality, if you will - a set of instinctual responses... preferences... and we can then choose to build upon that as we see fit.

Very interesting.

And you're right, seeing that I don't have any siblings probably makes it more difficult to determine a genetic factor. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

 

[Amethyst]

my personality isn't like that of my parents at all though... and I grew up on a farm far out in the country away from everyone else and STILL was an extrovert

Psh, I know, right?
I couldn't help my whole childhood (ever since I was 5) to convince my parents to move to a big city or a suburb...after 17 years, I've still failed.
I personally feel like my ISTJ father is f'ed up, as he probably has a lot of control issues, because it doesn't make sense that my ENFP mom is happy living where they are now.
And I feel like since all types are portrayed through each of them, and that I have a higher preference for my mother, I became more of her, but I still had to deal with my father, and I don't really know any F type who can.

 

[CuriousFeeling]

In my case, I'd say it's mostly upbringing, not only with my parents, but interaction with grandparents as well. My father is an INTP, and mother is an ISTJ, and ISTJ mom is the planner of the house, thus being in this environment, it encouraged development of Te. Perhaps my use of Fe comes from my maternal grandmother who is a feeling type of introvert, I suspect ISFJ. My maternal grandfather is an INTJ. On my father's side, grandmother is an ENFP, and grandfather is an ISTP. As a child, I tended to spend more time with my maternal grandparents than my paternal grandparents. I think that influenced my type as well. My mother has pointed out to me several times that I tend to get just like my INTJ grandfather. At the same time, though, I'm quite sensitive and have been emotionally expressive since day one though. I think that Ni and Fe were pretty much innate since birth. Te I think was fostered through the environment and upbringing. Probably this is why I've become an INTJ flavored INFJ.