ENFP with an introverted side as a child

[Emectar]

The more ive been reading around this site the more ive noticed that im not the only ENFP who was very introverted as a child. I'm trying to figure this out. My theories for myself, (which im not feeling to decided on) are mabye that i lacked the confidence to join the larger groups? I also wonder if my need for authenticity scared me away from kids that age who in general are too confused on the inside to show anything real on the outside?

Just theories.

Im wondering if you guys have any ideas on this

 

[Lady_X]

my mother says that i was shy when i was really young...like from about 5 to maybe 9 or so. i think i grew out of it once i realized most people were really nice and seemed to like me. i think before then i felt too weird or different...out of touch with reality. i was very lost in daydream land...but i decided it didn't matter even if they did think i was weird because who says you have to be like everyone else anyway...plus i really liked other weird people too.

that sounds like i was some odd lil outcast in school haha i actually wasn't at all.

 

[KDude]

yeah childhood doesn't matter probably. i used to pull fire alarms and pinch girls on the butt as a way to say "Hi!" now i call myself "introverted".

 

[goodgrief]

As an NP you were probably more likely to spend time thinking these things over in your head and thinking of what possibly could happen. I don't think that is an exclusive INTP trait. Maybe you didn't get a good start in childhood and that could have caused it.

 

[Emectar]

I definetely spent alot of time thinking about what would come of it, and i think i also have done a lot of retreospective thinking on it. It might have been that i didn't get a good start in childhood though i can't think what could have been.

And "i think before then i felt too weird or different...out of touch with reality. i was very lost in daydream land..." makes a lot of sense to me. I was always in la-la land. Which might help explain it.

 

[Kurt.Is.God]

Yeah. I was.

Perhaps ENFPs want to be authentic in everything--which often means obnoxiously blurting out every thought that drifts across their mind.
And maybe this is coupled with their self-consciousness (introspection--is this an NP thing?).
If they find they're not being taken too well for being themselves, they get withdrawn--which, in their minds, is better than adopting social conventions and forfeiting their "authenticity" (Emectar?). And maybe their complete tactlessness plays in as well. Thoughts?

I was pretty extroverted until middle school after I got the impression people hated me for being totally obnoxious and injecting my opinion into every conversation. And I was tactless. And unhygienic.

An ENFP thing?

 

[Queen Kat]

I used to be very extraverted as a child, except when I was around my family, because my cousins were always cruel to me. Now I've been pretty introverted for a few years because I kind of wasn't allowed to show the real me. I've tested INFP and even INFJ for a long time, especially when my life was at it's hardest. Sometimes I still let my extraverted side out and I also feel extraverted. Put me in a room full of strangers and I won't stop talking. I love big crouds, I love attention and even though I'm supposed to be the silent kid I really like talking and once I begin, I won't stop.

 

[figsfiggyfigs]

I was definitely an INFJ when I was a child

during my later years ( junior high, high school, even 1st year college), I was ENFJ/p....

Now I'm xNTJ. O_O

 

[Kurt.Is.God]

I've tested INFP and even INFJ for a long time, especially when my life was at it's hardest.

Yeah. I get that. I thought I was an INFP for the longest time in middle school.

 

[Lady_X]

Yeah. I was.

Perhaps ENFPs want to be authentic in everything--which often means obnoxiously blurting out every thought that drifts across their mind.
And maybe this is coupled with their self-consciousness (introspection--is this an NP thing?).
If they find they're not being taken too well for being themselves, they get withdrawn--which, in their minds, is better than adopting social conventions and forfeiting their "authenticity" (Emectar?). And maybe their complete tactlessness plays in as well. Thoughts?

I was pretty extroverted until middle school after I got the impression people hated me for being totally obnoxious and injecting my opinion into every conversation. And I was tactless. And unhygienic.

An ENFP thing?

i think so...it was very important to me even as a child to do what i thought was right. i couldn't stand when other kids weren't nice to someone...or made fun of someone...i think even then i took it upon myself to stand up for and befriend those kids...i would disregard someones opinion and say nope i think they're cool...or funny or sweet or whatever and go talk to them. i couldn't stand people to be labeled as nerds or dorks or weirdos...i thought those people just didn't bother to really look...i was definitely that person that rejected any sort of social expectations from a pretty early age.

 

[Kurt.Is.God]

i couldn't stand when other kids weren't nice to someone...or made fun of someone...i think even then i took it upon myself to stand up for and befriend those kids...

Totally and exactly! Except for that bit about defying social conventions. I get the feeling I'm (we're?) very, very influenced by others and by their expectations of me, as much as I try to pass myself off as someone who isn't at all.

 

[garbage]

As a child, doctors told my parents that I might be autistic because I never talked

I sure showed them

 

[Kurt.Is.God]

My preschool teachers wanted me tested for autism as well. It turned out to be selective mutism.

 

[sculpting]

when under five I hardly ever spoke, then once in school I started blurting out everything I thought. By about second grade I realized this was weird and so stopped talking again. I didnt start talking very much again until almost 17 when I started waiting tables and then only to very close friends. I was very INFP-ish looking on the surface but I had learned to to care at all about what other people thought of me.

 

[Queen Kat]

In high school all my classmates thought (and still think) I'm autistic, because I don't talk to them (they're mean and boring and I don't talk to mean and boring people). When I was little I got psychologically tested multiple times, once because I had trouble breathing while talking and once because I was playing the histrionic alpha female over the other girls in forth grade. Both times they stopped testing me, I have no idea why. Four years ago a teacher wanted to get me tested for schizophrenia, but the psychologist thought I was too normal for that.

 

[Amethyst]

People really change from childhood to adulthood...mostly.
I was probably an INFP during grade school. Super shy, and 100% F, that changed in high school though. I became who I wanted to be, and grade school was a place of fear for me, I wasn't myself.

 

[Amethyst]

In high school all my classmates thought (and still think) I'm autistic, because I don't talk to them (they're mean and boring and I don't talk to mean and boring people). When I was little I got psychologically tested multiple times, once because I had trouble breathing while talking and once because I was playing the histrionic alpha female over the other girls in forth grade. Both times they stopped testing me, I have no idea why. Four years ago a teacher wanted to get me tested for schizophrenia, but the psychologist thought I was too normal for that.

Omg, me too!
Everyone thinks I'm autistic. I joke about it all the time, but the funny thing is, everyone thinks I am. I'm pretty sure I'm not, I'm just a bitch tehe.

 

[Queen Kat]

I'm absolutely not autistic. I just show people that I don't respect them by avoiding them and I kinda disrespect a lot of people I know. I've always acted like that. A kindergarten teacher of mine already noticed it and this behaviour still didn't disappear. I have done a few online autism tests, but I always test negatively.