1. What is your personality type? INxP. I score both INFP and INTP regularly, but historically I am/was an INFP with a weak F.
2. Are you male or female? Female.
3. What country do you live in now? What country are you born in? Born in the UK, and am still here. England, specifically.
4. What cultural background are you?
Suburban white girl from a lower-middle class family. Has a scottish mother from a lower-middle class family (father was an engineer), and English father from a working class family (father was in the army). I will be the first generation of my father's side to go to university, and the second generation of my mother's. Ethically, I'm bland and white, with little variation in there. English and Scottish, with no foreigners in there at all.
5. What religion are you? What religion is your family?
Family itself is apathetic/agnostic. My mother was brought up a mild Christian, but abandoned it before she met my father, and my father always thought little of religion. I'm an atheist, personally, and actively decided on it.
6. What career are you in or looking to be in? What are you doing right now to help you achieve this career goal?
Ideally, I'd want to do lots of things in my lifetime - perhaps this is naive of me. I'd like to possibly either go into research and become a professor of English Lit., or remove myself from that world completely and dabble in industries such as journalism and advertising before trying my hand at teaching. I'd like to preferably publish a novel or a book of poetry in my lifetime. I've had experience with my local paper as well as a national one, and I write creatively a lot in my spare time. I am obviously going to do English at uni.
7. What are your friendships like with both genders? How many good friends do you have and why are you friends with these people?
I'm still technically in the last year of school. I go to an all-girls school, so I have limited friendship experience with males. Nevertheless, I'm fairly reserved in conversation towards all, and 'awkwardly polite' with most people before I get to know them. In group discussions, I let others mainly talk, and interject with occasional comments - usually witty comments, although in groups with more socially able/wittier/funnier participants which I'm not used to, I feel unable to compete. The more comfortable I am with a group of people, I find the better I am interacting socially. I despise small talk. If I talk, I prefer it to be about something interesting and/or meaningful. Most males I talk to aren't stereotypical - I'm rather intimidated by the jock-type lads who do everything for the banter and the laughs, so my male friendships tend to be similar to my female ones. I'm not overly girly anyway, and I role my eyes at the stereotypical LET'S TALK ABOUT MENSTRUATION LOUDLY my friends have a habit of doing, just to scare off guys.
Close friends - I have had three really close friendships, and have kept two of them. One of which, my oldest friendship, died a couple of years ago. It was interesting, actually - I was the quirky weird one, and she was completely normal, but unlike the vast majority of people who I've encountered with in my life like that, we could talk for hours upon hours on end without feeling awkward or lapsing into awkward silence at all. I'm sad we drifted apart. My others are with an outspoken female brainiac who skipped ahead a year in school, and relentlessly eccentric male with a rather large inferiority complex. Both of them I talk to very naturally - that's important to me, since it's so rare, and both of them I enjoy talking to since they both treasure debate and/or meaningful conversation. The girl I became friends with solely because I enjoyed playing devil's advocate to try and out debate her.
8. What paranoias do you have? I don't have anything, really.
9. What are your vices?
I can be fairly self-centred. Trying to do things for others is difficult - although I appreciate others and empathise with them, being pro-active about such things is difficult. I have little respect for what I consider pointless manners such as thank-you letters, as they are usually trite and completely insincere. I also lack motivation at times and get-up-and-go to make what I can with my life.
10. What are your fears? Loneliness. Doing little with my life. And death to an extent, although I'll conquer that with time.
11. What is your relationship like with your parents? siblings (if you had any)?
I'm fairly close, although not amazingly close, to my parents. My mother probably more, since she can play the extrovert more easily in my family than anyone else (we're all chronic introverts). If I have problems which I can't talk to my best male friend about, I'll go to her to talk heart-to-heart and/or cry into her shoulder. We were incredibly close when I was younger, although she found me increasingly alien as I grew up - I wasn't much of a rebellious teenager at all, but my growing up made her realise I was much more my father's child than she had previously imagined. She's a conformist, and I'm not, by nature, and that's where the conflict lied.
My father, I was pretty intimidated by as a kid. He was scary when he was angry, and he was always terrible at consoling people emotionally, being extremely practical. I saw him less than I did mum (she works part time, he doesn't), I imagine that's also partially why. I've tried to actively become closer to him. My father makes my mother look gregarious - and the both of us being rather socially reclusive, conversation between us is always limited, although I've come to realise that is not a bad thing. He is probably the only person who I can happily be silent around, though, without feeling guilty about it. It's really refreshing. He's always had a soft spot for me, I think, and I'm appreciating him much more than I used to.
My younger brother of two years... eh. We bickered a lot as kids. He did look up to me at times, through the bickering, although I think any of that has disappeared with the adolescent revelation that his sister is a bit odd. We keep out of each others way now and don't argue much - sometimes he tries to be deliberately irritating still, but he's still a kid in a man's body. But yeah, our relationship used to be stronger. I doubt it'll last much when we're adults. We're just completely different as people go - you can see how we're both products of our parents, but the apples fell on opposite sides of the tree here.
12. How are you with expressing emotion in public?
I cry a lot, although I hate doing it and always hide it. I also hug people a lot - although I'm not keen on too much physical interaction - like touching hands or eye contact whilst speaking (I can't look into people's eyes when speaking at all). Er, I'm pretty awkward with expressing my feelings aloud, really. If there's something major going on emotionally, I'll wait a couple of weeks before I tell my friends, after it's calmed down, because I don't like demanding attention.
13. How do you think people saw you in high school? How do you think people see you now?
I'm still in high school XD. A socially retarded nerd, but not the intimidating kind. Smiles a lot - apparently, I really have little control over what my face does - and is generally perceived as being 'nice', regardless of quietness.
14. What do you see as the point to your life and life in general?
To make the most of it whilst I have this brief flash of potentially brilliant existence. I don't believe in souls and I'm not at all spiritual - I am but a complex yet fragile collection of matter, as is the rest of humanity, floating on the assertion that we are more important than we are. In the grand scheme of things I am insignificant, as is everything. I have come to terms with this surprisingly easily, though, and I cannot explain why. Perhaps it's due to my baseless faith in humanity being actually not that bad. I think my fascination with humans probably contributes to my love of them. If I cannot contribute to the future and on a wide scale, I would like to contribute on a small scale - make a few people happy, or perhaps discover a few truths in my lifetime, and that will be good enough for me. That I have contributed in some way will add meaning enough.
