Type & preference Q&A

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Many people haven't learned the reasoning some other types go through, so they have a loads of whys and whys. Why do you Exxx do these things that way? Why do you J's plan that much? Etc. Others think they've got the idea why the opposite type acts like the way it acts, but they seek confirmation for their theories.

Questions? -Direct your questions to someone of specific type, concise group of types, or people of certain preference.

Answers? Quote the question, or include it in your answer.

I'll ask first. (I don't need to be converted to J-belief, so don't try to convert me. I'm a J.)

Q: You J, what significance does "planning" have in your life?

Q: J, why do you try to get a little things fixed before anything, say, color of flowers prior to wedding reception? Time you'll leave from the cinema? Anything?

..

Add your own questions. Address them to specific people, like those who think of themselves as SJ, or T, or EF, or anything.

If you can, answer what's been asked. Try to give a definite answer - one that could go in a dictionary, or thesaurus.

 

[stellar renegade]

Ask me questions, people!

 

[Jeffster]

Ask me questions, people!

How come I can't get no Tang round here?

 

[stellar renegade]

How come I can't get no Tang round here?

Um... probably because you're on the wrong site? Allow me to redirect you.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

ESTP: Do you cancel a lot of meetings with your friends? If you do cancel, what does it mean?

ESTP: Would it be hard for you to admit you don't want to spend time with an old friend anymore?

 

[StephMC]

ETJs (Or at least in my experience with ETJs): How does being Type A feel? Can you teach me how?

 

[stellar renegade]

ESTP: Do you cancel a lot of meetings with your friends? If you do cancel, what does it mean?

haha, oh man. Am I guessing prior experience plays into this question?

It really depends on when you catch me. I tend to be kinda flaky alot. Sometimes I just end up doing something else instead. I really like to hang out with friends though so I try to do that whenever possible. If I do cancel it just means I wanted to do something else instead. I never hold grudges and I love hanging out with anybody and everybody, so it's not a drama thing. Unless you're really negative and constantly dogging on me. Then I probably will end up avoiding you.

ESTP: Would it be hard for you to admit you don't want to spend time with an old friend anymore?

What old friend would I not want to spend time with anymore?

Actually I do kinda have an issue like this with my best friend. I don't know what it is but we don't seem to click like we used to. At one phase in my life we had the same sense of humor and eccentric view of life (I was going through an N phase, it seems) but now even though he's still like that, I'm not, and he talks abstractly and I can't follow. He's also turned into somewhat of a jerk, which he admits to (when he read his MBTI description, he kept asking where the part was about being an asshole :yim_rolling_on_the_) and anal. Seems to want me to either commit to things or be more reflective which I can't do.

He's told me that he feels like I don't want to really spend time with him anymore. I don't like to admit that at all but I'm beginning to wonder how true that is. I like to be a great friend and everything, but it's hard when half the time he's complaining about something and the other half he's talking about things I don't exactly think are funny. I guess it makes me wonder, have I turned into a jerk, too?

I guess I just don't like to think about those kinds of things very much. I keep it all on a somewhat superficial level, and thinking about deep relationship issues just freaks me out. I usually explain away my "avoidance" of him as being circumstantially related but then later wonder if he was right about it.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

ETJs (Or at least in my experience with ETJs): How does being Type A feel? Can you teach me how?

I'm a slightly A-type ENTJ, and it feels like I have stuff to do. I'm ever calculating what I'll get from a given task, and I look towards it. It might be a month of living nicely, but even if it was a nice month, I'd be asking: what will (did) I get from it, apart from the nice feeling? Did I save or accomplish anything, and how does it compare to my set schedule? (Like, graduating in half a year).

If you'd like to learn, start from new tasks you're considering. Compare your happiness now, trouble doing the task, happiness gained after finishing the task. If it's a task to reduce misery, then compare that. Learn to instinctively do the tasks that lead to greater total happiness, even if they started out with bad parts. You start these from easy tasks and move on to bigger tasks, until you trust your skills in evaluating all that.

There's no reason to get more A than that.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Question: Often in a planning situation, in my attempt to brainstorm, trying to be creative, free, etc, I'm unable to not think about my already established plans. It's also difficult for me not to judge my own thoughts immediately (I'll do it / I won't do it). What type (or preference) should I ask advice about this? I'd like to engage in free thinking with as little judgement and commitment bias as possible.

 

[poppy]

Question: Often in a planning situation, in my attempt to brainstorm, trying to be creative, free, etc, I'm unable to not think about my already established plans. It's also difficult for me not to judge my own thoughts immediately (I'll do it / I won't do it). What type (or preference) should I ask advice about this? I'd like to engage in free thinking with as little judgement and commitment bias as possible.

You need a big serving of Ne with a side of Ne and some Ne on top.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Question: Often in a planning situation, in my attempt to brainstorm, trying to be creative, free, etc, I'm unable to not think about my already established plans. It's also difficult for me not to judge my own thoughts immediately (I'll do it / I won't do it). -- -- I'd like to engage in free thinking with as little judgement and commitment bias as possible.

You need a big serving of Ne with a side of Ne and some Ne on top.

Q: ENxP, can you recommend an exercise that lets me develop something like that in there? I wouldn't have more than few hours a week for that, I'm too busy.

 

[stellar renegade]

On second thought, I was probably just being negative. There are a lot of ways in which my best friend and I get along, it's just not quite the same as it used to be!

I'm a slightly A-type ENTJ, and it feels like I have stuff to do. I'm ever calculating what I'll get from a given task, and I look towards it. It might be a month of living nicely, but even if it was a nice month, I'd be asking: what will (did) I get from it, apart from the nice feeling? Did I save or accomplish anything, and how does it compare to my set schedule? (Like, graduating in half a year).

If you'd like to learn, start from new tasks you're considering. Compare your happiness now, trouble doing the task, happiness gained after finishing the task. If it's a task to reduce misery, then compare that. Learn to instinctively do the tasks that lead to greater total happiness, even if they started out with bad parts. You start these from easy tasks and move on to bigger tasks, until you trust your skills in evaluating all that.

There's no reason to get more A than that.

I don't think I could ever approach life like that... I generally just drift towards activities that I know are going to give me the greatest amount of happiness by instinct.

You need a big serving of Ne with a side of Ne and some Ne on top.

Or maybe Se! Although that would probably be harder for you to develop, I guess.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

I don't think I could ever approach life like that... I generally just drift towards activities that I know are going to give me the greatest amount of happiness by instinct.

Immediate or delayed?

 

[stellar renegade]

Immediate or delayed?

Both. There has to be immediate pleasure too or it doesn't seem worth it.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

For me too. Sometimes I have to look from another angle to find the pleasure. Or, cheat my way through, reward myself or something like that.

 

[FDG]

ETJs (Or at least in my experience with ETJs): How does being Type A feel?

Depends: if I've got a lot of stuff to do, great. If I don't have much to do, quite bad, since I'll get nervous.

Can you teach me how?

I believe it's an inborn neurological/neurochemical condtion, actually.

 

[The_Liquid_Laser]

Q: ENxP, can you recommend an exercise that lets me develop something like that in there? I wouldn't have more than few hours a week for that, I'm too busy.

Here is what I would recommend. First try to brainstorm with an ENxP type. Let them come up with an initial idea first. Go in with the attitude that they are going to come up with the best idea possible and that you want to understand their idea as fully as possible. Once they have described their idea as fully as they understand it, then try to think of a way to make their idea better. If it's an ENxP they will probably start adding onto whatever you said, and you can go like this back and forth trying to make the idea as good as possible.

Make sure they come up with the initial idea though. Even if you have your own initial idea you need to decide that you aren't going to use it, so there's no point in holding onto it anyway.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Any advice on how to start a creative, open mood alone, without chance to talk to anyone?

I've gotten so far just mediocre results with what I've tried. I've woken up to a new day, trying to think it'll be great. I have put good music, made a really energetic and interesting playlist of some music I've had, I've made lists like 20 things I'd want to do - fantastic, not plain. I've tried to think I can change anything I want. I've drawn, I've dreamed.

I think I have a paralyzing amount of stress going on with my life. That presents a hard problem, as I'd try to find an innovative way to reduce the stress, perhaps by seeing the daily chores in a more positive light, making most of my day, or finding an easier job.

Other times I've been in creative mood, but I haven't been able to translate it to accomplishment. It's like, my creativity has been in the realm of fiction rather than reality.

 

[The_Liquid_Laser]

Any advice on how to start a creative, open mood alone, without chance to talk to anyone?

I've gotten so far just mediocre results with what I've tried. I've woken up to a new day, trying to think it'll be great. I have put good music, made a really energetic and interesting playlist of some music I've had, I've made lists like 20 things I'd want to do - fantastic, not plain. I've tried to think I can change anything I want. I've drawn, I've dreamed.

I think I have a paralyzing amount of stress going on with my life. That presents a hard problem, as I'd try to find an innovative way to reduce the stress, perhaps by seeing the daily chores in a more positive light, making most of my day, or finding an easier job.

Other times I've been in creative mood, but I haven't been able to translate it to accomplishment. It's like, my creativity has been in the realm of fiction rather than reality.

I don't really know the answer to this question. I would think if you're imagination is having trouble applying to reality, then the best way to fix that is to brainstorm with another person. The other person is there to help you make your creativity more practical.

In MBTI terms I think if you are by yourself your imagination will work with Ni and be more divorced from reality. If you are brainstorming with another person your imagination will work with Ne and be more connected to reality.

 

[Two Point Two]

Question to Ni-doms: What does Ni mean to you? How does it manifest? What's it like to be Ni-dominant?

Question to Ne-doms: What does your Ne mean to you? How does it manifest? What's it like to be Ne-dominant?

In short (although I guess no one person can answer this): What is it like to be each of the two different kinds of N-dominant type?

Another question, to any type at all: How pervasive is your dominant function in your life?