So, which letter is the most important?

[Poki]

Not IME. Frienships can be okay, but for romantic relationships not really. I go best with other strong intuitives, Ni or Ne.

For me, the order of importance is approximately, from greatest importance to least importance:

1. N/S (strong N)
2. T/F = J/P (prefer someone who is fairly adept with both)
3. E/I (If an E, not a strong one)

Is that what you want or what works? Also is that based on you typing the person? People like to sit in there dominant function which means that an ISTP TiSeNiFe will sit alot in TiNi and can seem N and is really good at being N, but always doubts there N ability.

 

[Lauren Ashley]

Is that what you want or what works? Also is that based on you typing the person?

Both. My preferences because it works.

Most people I deal with on a daily basis have taken the MBTI. But I verify the results over time, because people mistype.

People like to sit in there dominant function which means that an ISTP TiSeNiFe will sit alot in TiNi and can seem N and is really good at being N, but always doubts there N ability.

I don't know many ISTPs that seem like N, but I know ISFPs that do (and test as N types).

 

[Poki]

Both. My preferences because it works.

Most people I deal with on a daily basis have taken the MBTI. But I verify the results over time, because people mistype.


I don't know many ISTPs that seem like N, but I know ISFPs that do (and test as N types).

Then you havnt really got to know an ISTP Our N is very guarded because we dont trust it. I initially tested as INTP.

 

[Randomnity]

I/E, for me.

I have a theory that for most people their strongest letter/the letter they identify most with will be the one they want shared. I just don't think I could (happily) handle the stress of living with an extrovert.

Also I kinda have the opposite opinion as poki, I think Ni works well with SeNi and Ne with SiNe, both because there seem to be more relationships like that and because I'm far more attracted/comfortable overall with Ni-types (INJs) than Ne types (INPs and especially ENPs).

I identify with TiNi more than TISe too, for what it's worth.

 

[Lauren Ashley]

Then you havnt really got to know an ISTP Our N is very guarded because we dont trust it. I initially tested as INTP.

...Yes, I have. I know several. They're pretty nice guys (I don't know the women that well). I was almost in a relationship with one so I know him very well, but that's another thread for another day.

Maybe ISTPs believe that they are N-like, but it doesn't come across to me that way. Makes sense if they are introverting their intuition.

I have a theory that for most people their strongest letter/the letter they identify most with will be the one they want shared.

That works for me.

 

[01011010]

I prefer F over M.

Indeed, good sir.


OP: N/S

 

[Stanton Moore]

Hmm.

An experience over the weekend with my GF's brother (possibly ESTJ) and his family reminded me how important F is to maintaining personal relationships. Her bro seems to lack emotion and social grace. He simply doesn't know how to comport himself.
He's actually a very kind and generous person, but his very cold exterior is taking a toll on his wife (maybe INFP/J) and there will be problems with his kids, if my own upbringing by a similarly constituted man is any indication.

 

[Udog]

I'm fairly balanced in I, F, and J. However, I'm pretty hardcore N.

So N over S is likely the most important with me. The others don't matter quite as much.

 

[Geoff]

P v J. This is because it has the biggest impact on the function order, and in particular whether NS or TF are the external function that others interact with.

 

[Yloh]

Yea, I also agree with the strength of the letter. It makes sence to me that your strongest letter should match your partner's letter (ex: some one with a 100% J should be paired with another J).

It also makes sence to be paired with someone who shairs your dominit function.

For me, both my dominit function (Fe) and strongest letter (F). It would make sence I would get along better with another F in a relationship.

My younger cousin is an ENTJ with a 100% J and very weak everwhere else. It would make sence he would get along better with another J who also has a T in a relationship.

This may not be true with every case, but it makes sence to have things work this way.

 

[Poki]

Hmm.

An experience over the weekend with my GF's brother (possibly ESTJ) and his family reminded me how important F is to maintaining personal relationships. Her bro seems to lack emotion and social grace. He simply doesn't know how to comport himself.
He's actually a very kind and generous person, but his very cold exterior is taking a toll on his wife (maybe INFP/J) and there will be problems with his kids, if my own upbringing by a similarly constituted man is any indication.

You know the people I get along the best with are F types. These are the types that feel the most comfortable around me. Dont compare SJs and SPs. SJs are alot different than SPs. You are more likely to find me around women than men.

There are ways to take care of F without actually being F.

 

[NewEra]

Most important letter is probably E or I, because that's the one most popular (or well-known) personality trait. What I mean is one of the first things a person not familiar to MBTI can ask regarding personality is whether a person is outgoing or a loner. Also, I think F or T is very important, because it is behind most decision-making. Deciding with the head or the heart.

 

[Saslou]

Most important (equally) I, E, S, N, F, T, J, P.

 

[Glycerine]

My N is really strong but I find SPs to be really attractive. My E and J aren't that strong and I have a decent use of Ti (This is the function that saves me in school). However, I could see myself marrying a XXSP, XNTP, ENXJ, or an INFP. I guess S/N and P/J would be the most important for me.

 

[Unique]

I find it interesting that so many folks think that the S/N distinction is the most important. I don't. In fact, I think I may be attracted to some Ss (particularly SPs) because they get me out of my head. I don't know if I could get along with a partner if he was EXTREMELY S, but I honestly don't get the fixation with N.

Then again, my preference for P over J might strike others equally as odd.

Not odd at all to me, I agree 100% and don't know where people get these examples from

From what I see in the real world NF/SP works well and two Ns become too intense and frustrated with each other

Maybe just an NF ideal but when put into practice things don't go as well as hoped

I'm attracted to Ps, so P/J is the most important to me

Maybe an introverted J though

 

[BlackCat]

I don't really have a preference to be honest, E and I don't really make much of a difference except that E's make me get out more and get me to talk more, while I's I enjoy pretty much equally. We both think for a while and then start discussing something, then have a break, while an extrovert just talks and springs my mind into action to respond.

S and N... I could really care less.

T and F... I am biased toward being in the company of T's, but I like F's a lot too. It's all subjective to the person. I think it all boils down to the fact that I really dislike touchy feely and overly emotional people. But it doesn't matter that much.

P and J... I'm borderline on both so I could really care less. I honestly don't notice P and J really getting in the way of anything with my interactions with people. It just makes someone a certain way, and I can get along with P's and J's.

 

[simulatedworld]

I'm assuming by "important" you mean most fundamental difference between people.

And the answer is most definitely P vs. J.


I used to think it was S/N, but it's not--P/J is more fundamental because it's a question of the most basic organizational direction of one's life.

First of all you have to conceptualize the functions in terms of their Perceiving vs. Judging nature, so...

Ne/Se can be collectively referred to as "Pe"
Ni/Si = Pi
Te/Fe = Je
Ti/Fi = Ji

The primary difference between Js and Ps is that Js use Je+Pi (or Pi+Je) and Ps use Pe+Ji (or Ji+Pe.)

The key is that the decisive, organizational drive is pointed outwardly for Js, while they maintain a more flexible private inner attitude--organizing their outer worlds into measurable goals is most important.

For Ps, the organizational drive is pointed inwardly, so they maintain a more flexible and spontaneous outward attitude--maintaining internally organized and consistent inner principles is most important.

So I propose we redistribute the "temperaments" as follows:

EPs: Pe+Ji
IPs: Ji+Pe
EJs: Je+Pi
IJs: Pi+Je

 

[BlackCat]

I'm assuming by "important" you mean most fundamental difference between people.

And the answer is most definitely P vs. J.

Ah yes, of course. I forgot about the difference in people versus how they effect me with what I posted.

So I propose we redistribute the "temperaments" as follows:

EPs: Pe+Ji
IPs: Ji+Pe
EJs: Je+Pi
IJs: Pi+Je

I've proposed this before, it would be helpful. I've been trying to work on them but I've come up blank with everything but IP, and then I have a little bit of stuff for the others. Eh.

 

[simulatedworld]

Ah yes, of course. I forgot about the difference in people versus how they effect me with what I posted.



I've proposed this before, it would be helpful. I've been trying to work on them but I've come up blank with everything but IP, and then I have a little bit of stuff for the others. Eh.

I am actually writing a book on typology, compiling a bunch of my articles here and rewriting/editing into something cohesive that the average person could read and appreciate in everyday life. I think it's high time the many errors in the MBTI approach were formally corrected.

Introverts are actually a little more complex than Extroverts from one perspective because their dominant function contradicts the P/J attitude in their type.

This seems counterintuitive at first, but it's easy when you just conceptualize each Introverted type as its Extroverted equivalent with inverted priorities.

The P/J doesn't tell you whether you're dominant in a Perceiving or a Judging function; it tells you which of your two primary functions is extroverted/handles the outer world.

EPs are easy to describe because they epitomize P attitudes. Ne/Se are actually more similar to each other than they are to Ni/Si. They are very obviously random, spontaneous, adaptable and open to virtually any new experience just for its own sake. When they go into secondary Ji mode, they temporarily look like their IP cousins.

EJs epitomize J attitudes; they're outwardly directive and work best when they can organize others into their plans to produce results. When they go into secondary Pi mode, they temporarily look like their IJ cousins.

IPs are really just EPs with priorities reversed, so often it's difficult to distinguish which is which upon first meeting someone. You might see an INTP who just happens to be in secondary Ne mode that night, and easily mistake him for an ENTP because they look virtually the same. When IPs go into secondary Pe mode, they temporarily look like their EP cousins.

And so IJs are just EJs with priorities inverted; they use the same Je/Pi processes but spend more time in Pi mode, so that Pi becomes the dominant and Je the auxiliary. Naturally, IJs in secondary Je mode look temporarily like EJs. It's really that simple.

So remember:

xxxJ = Je + Pi (or Pi+Je)
xxxP = Pe + Ji (or Ji+Pe)

Exxx = Xe + Xi
Ixxx = Xi + Xe

 

[BlackCat]

...

Wow, why haven't we really communicated before? We seem to look at typology in the same manner and seem to "get" the same stuff. I guess I just never knew that about you.