What do Ts get from Fs in a relationship?

[jenocyde]

Yeah, I brought that up way earlier in the thread. Didn't see any responses to it though, until now.

"Your stupid" "your feelings are stupid" "your so irrational" "you make no sense" "thats the dumbest thing I've ever heard" "You CANT be serious!?!?!" "your a passive wimp" "I can't help the fact that you have thin skin", ....

I would never ever use words or phrases like the ones that mock your intelligence level or emotional state, but I can imagine the bolded ones getting thrown around a lot. We say these things to each other and either laugh it off or debate it away. It means nothing to me to say something is a dumb idea (although I would never call a person dumb). But I don't expect someone to retreat, I expect that to be the jumping off point to a great conversation... It's just a different mentality, I guess. In other words, these phrases may not be as emotionally charged as you are perceiving them to be.

 

[Lily Bart]

F's bring good social skills to a relationship and give a couple a better sense of connectedness to family, friends and community, which may not seem so important early in the relationship, but becomes essential later on. F's are also, especially later in life (although some have this earlier than others) are more likely to have strong values -- rock-solid beliefs about what makes life worthwhile. I've seen some T's in their mid-to-late forties bouncing from fad to fad trying frantically to give meaning to their lives while others, presumably because they had guidance from a strong F-type, seem to have something more solid to turn back to when things get tough. This is not to say that I, too, haven't wondered what T's see in F's. T's are so darn useful and practical! Plus, they tend to give the impression that they don't need anybody and that F-type values are not particularly high on their priority lists -- I promise you, though, this does change as they mature!!

 

[jenocyde]

F's bring good social skills to a relationship and give a couple a better sense of connectedness to family, friends and community, which may not seem so important early in the relationship, but becomes essential later on. F's are also, especially later in life (although some have this earlier than others) are more likely to have strong values -- rock-solid beliefs about what makes life worthwhile. I've seen some T's in their mid-to-late forties bouncing from fad to fad trying frantically to give meaning to their lives while others, presumably because they had guidance from a strong F-type, seem to have something more solid to turn back to when things get tough. This is not to say that I, too, haven't wondered what T's see in F's. T's are so darn useful and practical! Plus, they tend to give the impression that they don't need anybody and that F-type values are not particularly high on their priority lists -- I promise you, though, this does change as they mature!!

:rolli:

 

[JocktheMotie]

F's bring good social skills to a relationship and give a couple a better sense of connectedness to family, friends and community, which may not seem so important early in the relationship, but becomes essential later on. F's are also, especially later in life (although some have this earlier than others) are more likely to have strong values -- rock-solid beliefs about what makes life worthwhile. I've seen some T's in their mid-to-late forties bouncing from fad to fad trying frantically to give meaning to their lives while others, presumably because they had guidance from a strong F-type, seem to have something more solid to turn back to when things get tough. This is not to say that I, too, haven't wondered what T's see in F's. T's are so darn useful and practical! Plus, they tend to give the impression that they don't need anybody and that F-type values are not particularly high on their priority lists -- I promise you, though, this does change as they mature!!

I don't know...I think I'm pretty useless!

Also, I think you're pretty off.

 

[redacted]

They're just so well meaning and thoughtful (well, at least if I choose to be in a relationship with them). They tune me in to stuff I should think about more.

Plus, it's not like they can't talk about T stuff.

 

[Frank]

It's obvious what Fs get from Ts, but what do Ts get from Fs?

T types please post!

You make us human and if we can pay attention we learn to not just steamroll our way through life but to appreciate the gooshy shit too.

 

[BlackCat]

Reviving this thread.

 

[ChocolateMoose123]

Social finesse. General sense of wanting to please people.

I like F's because they are much better at speaking to people. They seem to have a natural warmth about them.

They show me that people and their feelings are valuable.

 

[JustHer]

Well I don't often like Fs in relationships, but I guess they're good for letting me know when I'm not being nice

 

[INA]

guilt trips

 

[Synarch]

I've thought about this a lot. "Feelers" often see the significance of things. For me, I am so busy pulling everything apart that I lose my way. I lose track of what is valuable. Feelers are good at keeping me connected to humanity.

 

[jenocyde]

I've thought about this a lot. "Feelers" often see the significance of things. For me, I am so busy pulling everything apart that I lose my way. I lose track of what is valuable. Feelers are good at keeping me connected to humanity.

Syn, I don't really understand this perspective. I agree that everyone has their place in society but what does "connected to humanity" mean? Does this mean "connected to other Fs"? Why do we need to see the significance of things that we don't feel are significant from our own natural standpoint?

 

[Moiety]

This really begs the question (I haven't read the whole topic but) : What do Fs get from Ts in a relationship?

 

[Synarch]

Syn, I don't really understand this perspective. I agree that everyone has their place in society but what does "connected to humanity" mean? Does this mean "connected to other Fs"? Why do we need to see the significance of things that we don't feel are significant from our own natural standpoint?

For me, it means I stay human. Otherwise I become more and more uncivilized until I stop caring about anything. When I am around strong T's, all we talk about is how meaningless it all is and how people are just animals and how life has no apparent meaning, etc. etc. I like that Feelers have thought our reasons for giving a fuck.

 

[INA]

Now we get to the nitty gritty of what stops Ts from howling at the moon and eating our young.

 

[WoodsWoman]

If Ts get grounded in humanity Fs need and get grounding in reality.

 

[OrangeAppled]

If Ts get grounded in humanity Fs need and get grounding in reality.

You really think Thinking is more realistic? I don't see it that way. For instance, I see a Ti-dom as more detached from reality than a Fe-dom, or a Se or Ne dom Feeler. Extroverts seem more aware of reality, because they are more concerned with the external than their own mind.

 

[Unique]

You really think Thinking is more realistic? I don't see it that way. For instance, I see a Ti-dom as more detached from reality than a Fe-dom, or a Se or Ne dom Feeler. Extroverts seem more aware of reality, because they are more concerned with the external than their own mind.

Hmm

I disagree

Which ISTPs are you meeting?

 

[Poki]

Someone to bring out our feelings. Not always good, but feelings none the less.

 

[Saslou]

This really begs the question (I haven't read the whole topic but) : What do Fs get from Ts in a relationship?

Balance