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Is this Te? If not, WTF is it????

cacaia

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Hi, all...I am asking this because some colleagues and loved ones exhibit this behavior that I find both aborrent and fascinating...
Whenever met with new people, whether it's people on some Facebook neighborhood website wanting to buy something you're selling, or whether it's a new employee, my coworkers or family members will say something to the extent of, "let's 'stalk' this person a little bit and see what they're all about..."
And then they proceed to look at said stranger's Facebook page or general internet research of published books, Instagram pictures, etc to see how said stranger is like....
I never say anything, but just smile and internally feel a bit squeamish that someone is out there reading up on a complete stranger they will exchange a few moments with if that....it feels a bit intrusive to me...so I am wondering what that function they are using is...because I don't think I consciously use it... Any thoughts?
 

Pionart

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I don't think it's Te, I'm not sure what it is though. I got the impression of introverted perception of some variety.
 

Yuurei

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Hi, all...I am asking this because some colleagues and loved ones exhibit this behavior that I find both aborrent and fascinating...
Whenever met with new people, whether it's people on some Facebook neighborhood website wanting to buy something you're selling, or whether it's a new employee, my coworkers or family members will say something to the extent of, "let's 'stalk' this person a little bit and see what they're all about..."
And then they proceed to look at said stranger's Facebook page or general internet research of published books, Instagram pictures, etc to see how said stranger is like....
I never say anything, but just smile and internally feel a bit squeamish that someone is out there reading up on a complete stranger they will exchange a few moments with if that....it feels a bit intrusive to me...so I am wondering what that function they are using is...because I don't think I consciously use it... Any thoughts?

Why on earth would this be Te? I think if "Te" wanted to 'learn about someone' they would go and talk to them.

This sounds more like a sort of neurosis-insisting on learning about people but being too paranoid to just go talk to them-than any function.
 

cacaia

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Yeah, I can see it's confusing for you guys, too....I've been trying to analyze it for weeks now and haven't really been able to pin it down...
 

cacaia

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I'm starting to lean more and more toward the perverted Ne theory 😅
 

Yuurei

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Yeah, I can see it's confusing for you guys, too....I've been trying to analyze it for weeks now and haven't really been able to pin it down...

I think it's perfectly in line with a society which spends so much in the digital world rather than the physical. They're a lost cause; save yourself. :laugh:
 

Jaguar

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Te? Come on, now. All it sounds like to me is you are surrounded by rodents.
 

cacaia

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LOL, you guys!
It's just...weird AF. And a little creepy. It makes me paranoid, like, do people research me like that to see " what I'm all about?" They'll be mightily disappointed!
A more solid example....s colleague who had trouble with one of her students decided to call home. She researched the parents beforehand ( creepy) and discovered that one of them was in the school board. She does this sneaky thing about people all the time....I guess that's her way of preparing for a conversation with someone? Hence I entertained the idea of Te.....
 

cascadeco

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LOL, you guys!
It's just...weird AF. And a little creepy. It makes me paranoid, like, do people research me like that to see " what I'm all about?" They'll be mightily disappointed!
A more solid example....s colleague who had trouble with one of her students decided to call home. She researched the parents beforehand ( creepy) and discovered that one of them was in the school board. She does this sneaky thing about people all the time....I guess that's her way of preparing for a conversation with someone? Hence I entertained the idea of Te.....

I think it's just an aspect of control and trying to get an 'edge' up on someone -- feel you 'know' more about them than they do about you -- so you have more control over any potential outcome or anything you might want to gain out of the convo/ situation, or if not that, then gaining some element of 'confidence' and keeping it to yourself that you know something about them that they don't know you know. (but this still ties to control I think) :shrug: Don't think it has much to with functions per se, I think it's another aspect of psychology. I think it is tied to social posturing / maneuvering / 'being in the know', most of the time. But to your latter example, it's what I mentioned first I think -- trying to get all of the 'data' you might be able to get to make something happen that you want to happen.
 

cacaia

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I think it's just an aspect of control and trying to get an 'edge' up on someone -- feel you 'know' more about them than they do about you -- so you have more control over any potential outcome or anything you might want to gain out of the convo/ situation, or if not that, then gaining some element of 'confidence' and keeping it to yourself that you know something about them that they don't know you know. (but this still ties to control I think) :shrug: Don't think it has much to with functions per se, I think it's another aspect of psychology. I think it is tied to social posturing / maneuvering / 'being in the know', most of the time. But to your latter example, it's what I mentioned first I think -- trying to get all of the 'data' you might be able to get to make something happen that you want to happen.
Yes, maybe.... fascinating stuff.
 

Maou

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:notype:

I think certain people just like doing this, and I have observed this myself. People who community police do this, and I can see it being associated with certain types that are unhealthy.
 

Pionart

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How does the behaviour being spoken of compare with forum "post-stalking"?

Like, say I want to know the type of a forum member. Maybe they asked in a type me thread, or maybe I just want to know it out of interest. So I trawl through the person's post history looking for relevant information to determine what their type is.

Is that in the ballpark of what's being spoken of? Is it considered creepy at all?
 

cacaia

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How does the behaviour being spoken of compare with forum "post-stalking"? Like, say I want to know the type of a forum member. Maybe they asked in a type me thread, or maybe I just want to know it out of interest. So I trawl through the person's post history looking for relevant information to determine what their type is. Is that in the ballpark of what's being spoken of? Is it considered creepy at all?
Short answer? Yes. A little.
 

Pionart

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Short answer? Yes. A little.

Well, I don't see what's wrong with it. Though if only "a little" maybe the behaviour mentioned oversteps boundaries in a way that I don't. I could see myself doing it though, even moreso than the example I provided.
 

cacaia

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Well, I don't see what's wrong with it. Though if only "a little" maybe the behaviour mentioned oversteps boundaries in a way that I don't. I could see myself doing it though, even moreso than the example I provided.
I mean, it's not like you're hacking into people's computers or anything , so you're good ☺️
I'll have to sit with myself and ponder why I find such behaviors creepy, though....I dunno, what are other people's thoughts?
I,for one, if I found out teachers were researching who I was in order to talk to me, I would feel weird, wouldn't you all?
 

Pionart

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I mean, it's not like you're hacking into people's computers or anything , so you're good ☺️
I'll have to sit with myself and ponder why I find such behaviors creepy, though....I dunno, what are other people's thoughts?
I,for one, if I found out teachers were researching who I was in order to talk to me, I would feel weird, wouldn't you all?

Oh yeah, computer hacking is a big no... just the IDEA that my computer could be hacked causes me a lot of stress. The people who are responsible for those sorts of things are in for a bad time. :mad:

I think it's uncomfortable to not know what a person knows about you. If they're honest about it and tell you, it would likely make you uncomfortable, but I wouldn't condemn them for doing it, and it's good they told you (if they did).

I guess it comes down to intent. If a person has bad intent against you, and is digging for info to use against you, then that's obviously bad, but in that case the actions they take are secondary to the reason they were doing it.

There's a common idea that if someone's interested enough to search up on you then you should be flattered, though I don't know if I quite buy that.
 

cacaia

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Oh yeah, computer hacking is a big no... just the IDEA that my computer could be hacked causes me a lot of stress. The people who are responsible for those sorts of things are in for a bad time. :mad: I think it's uncomfortable to not know what a person knows about you. If they're honest about it and tell you, it would likely make you uncomfortable, but I wouldn't condemn them for doing it, and it's good they told you (if they did). I guess it comes down to intent. If a person has bad intent against you, and is digging for info to use against you, then that's obviously bad, but in that case the actions they take are secondary to the reason they were doing it. There's a common idea that if someone's interested enough to search up on you then you should be flattered, though I don't know if I quite buy that.
Exactly, same here. I get paranoid first, flattered only if convinced it was done with good intentions🙂 but...good luck with convincing me 🙃😂
 
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