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View Poll Results: Who did you find on dating sites ?

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  • I don't use dating sites, no way !

    8 61.54%
  • Multiple adventures

    0 0%
  • Sex friend(s) and that's it !

    0 0%
  • Mates/friends

    0 0%
  • Boyfriend/girlfriend

    1 7.69%
  • Husband/wife

    2 15.38%
  • Other (pen friend/correspondance)

    2 15.38%
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Results 1 to 10 of 37

  1. #1
    Senior Member RedAmazoneFriendZone's Avatar
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    Default How each type uses dating sites and to what extend ?

    There is probably a post about this subject but I couldn't find it in the forum.


    Did you already suscribe to a dating site, why : was there a special event in your life that led you to that decision ?

    If yes, at this time were you just curious, did you feel alone or other motivations (sex, drug and rock'n roll) ?


    I would love to discover which kind of personality is more prone to "virtual love".



    Multiple adventures ? correspondance ? Sex friends you kept contact with or not ?

    Mates ? Boyfriend or girlfriend ? Or even husband or wife ...


    Did you discuss for long with your mate before meeting him/her ?

    Do you feel free when meeting someone in the virtual world or on the contrary do you have a tendency to feel limited ?

    Who tried first to meet" in reality", you or your partner ?



    Are you honest towards the person you seduce online or is it just a game ?

    Do you feel you can trust the "virtual partner" or you don't give any trust before meeting him/her ?


    Please help me understanding the many motivations behind those mysterious screens.





    ALL THAT WE SEE OR SEEM TO BE IS BUT A DREAM WITHIN A DREAM

    Dare observing your shadows (50 shades of darkness) for your own well-being Unfortunately we are all fucking contagious Smile and see what happens around you......

  2. #2
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    I have found online relationships after moreless knowing someone a long term online, but I do not willingly put myself on a dating website looking for a partner. I feel it sort of defeats the purpose of what love should be. Like this wonderful random event you didn't see coming. Unexpected. Finding someone who brings out the best in you and you in them. I feel like dating sites come from a superficial idea that you can just pick and choose from a selection and that degrades love. Also much of the romance from dating sites can be superficial too - I know way too many people who use tinder for finding a quick fuck. Not my idea of love.

    Now in my relationships I have found online, to be honest thus far I never met one of them offline. It was always discussed. I have trouble "exiting" the place I am because I'm not exactly rich and I know my family would about 500x over not help me maybe even throw me out. XD For the most part I find it nice because you can like someone for who they are rather than appearance or less important factors. So that's just my 2 cents.

  3. #3
    Junior Member GoodDude's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RedAmazoneFriendZone View Post
    There is probably a post about this subject but I couldn't find it in the forum.


    Did you already suscribe to a dating site, why : was there a special event in your life that led you to that decision ?

    If yes, at this time were you just curious, did you feel alone or other motivations (sex, drug and rock'n roll) ?


    I would love to discover which kind of personality is more prone to "virtual love".



    Multiple adventures ? correspondance ? Sex friends you kept contact with or not ?

    Mates ? Boyfriend or girlfriend ? Or even husband or wife ...


    Did you discuss for long with your mate before meeting him/her ?

    Do you feel free when meeting someone in the virtual world or on the contrary do you have a tendency to feel limited ?

    Who tried first to meet" in reality", you or your partner ?



    Are you honest towards the person you seduce online or is it just a game ?

    Do you feel you can trust the "virtual partner" or you don't give any trust before meeting him/her ?


    Please help me understanding the many motivations behind those mysterious screens.





    lol, you will never know who is at the opposite side of the monitor, because there are a lot of fake profiles and in 2019 it's not difficult to create this one. For example, I was texting with a cute girl using dating site and when we had a date, to me came a fat boy and said it's a prank. But it was strange that such case happened at all, because that dating site had a high moderation and sms verification, but it turned out, that that boy used services like from this site mobilesms.io, with the help of which people can create a lot of fake accounts passing the phone number verification... I will never trust a man until the moment I will meet him in real life
    Last edited by GoodDude; 07-16-2019 at 03:19 PM.

  4. #4
    Wake, See, Sing, Dance Cellmold's Avatar
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    Terrifying places, that may (have already) become a necessity.

    Alas I have neither the networking for day to day 'old fashioned' introductions and my wherewithal concerning dating sites is non-existent. It's like stepping into the highest-end of a competitive, skill-based, arena without any guide.

    The problem as well is that so many people I've met seem to have this status-obsessed pathology, insofar as they cynically go about fulfilling dreams and aspiration in a way that suggests they are being marketed to and that this marketing is working. In other words: Their desires don't seem to be fully their own.

    And I get it, right, I have cynical thoughts, I sometimes look at patterns of behaviour and also in myself and it's easy to boil everything down to a 'best fit' theory of describing what you personally experience. I also understand lust and perversion, I have perverted thoughts like pretty much anyone else (barring certain neurological issues and damage) and sexual appetites and desires, but I also know that they are not the entirety of my character. Yet others seem to operate on the assumption that one can be nothing more. What happened to a nuance of behaviour?

    The you-would-do-it-if-you-could mentality, while sometimes correct based on context, is often applied too wholesale to other people without individual specifications. And it's used to justify some of the worst behaviours I've witnessed regarding relationships. I have ambition in life, but not the common ambition to acquire as much of X as possible in order to garner an impressive following so I can keep reaching a plateau of frustrating extremes that never satisfies. I do have an ego though and arrogance and sometimes I want to be liked.

    But that is a flaw that is somewhat inherent and I try as much as possible to curtail when I'm indulging in it too much, which is more than can be said for those I've met on dating sites.
    I find it difficult to relate to other people on anything but a superficial level and I find online dating interactions to focus more on those aspects, which, given my earnestness at times, causes an issue in intimacy and connection.

    I guess I just need to be more unthinking, bull-headed and direct in my life if I was to compete in that arena. An arena where it's about piling excess on top of excess, where second-guessing your actions is a lesser consideration to how impressive you appear to be, regardless of the truth or fragility of that image. Where showmanship is everything and a flashy firework is more important than struggling with the ugly realities of life. Where your social media accounts have more of a life than you do.

    And where consequences are other people's problems, not yours.

    I just want to be able to relax and not be constantly forced to think in neurotic terms. Where I have attempted to fight back against those impulses, others seem to indulge it fully and in the most self-destructive terms.

    And I respect that others have found their loves on such sites, but so far I've found them singularly devoid of anyone I would want to be intimate with.
    'One of (Lucas) Cranach's masterpieces, discussed by (Joseph) Koerner, is in it's self-referentiality the perfect expression of left-hemisphere emptiness and a precursor of post-modernism. There is no longer anything to point to beyond, nothing Other, so it points pointlessly to itself.' - Iain McGilChrist

    Suppose a tree fell down, Pooh, when we were underneath it?"
    "Suppose it didn't," said Pooh, after careful thought.
    Piglet was comforted by this.
    - A.A. Milne.
    Likes SD45T-2 liked this post

  5. #5
    Softserve Ice Cream Agent Washington's Avatar
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    I've had better luck with interest groups.

    ...Not that I go in looking for partners, it just happened because we had mutual interests. Also, those niche groups are inherently more diverse than other typical groups, so I guess ... I lucked out?

    Anyway. There's that.

    Oddly enough, I haven't had much luck with dating sites... Got catfished by one guy who actually appeared in flesh and was of a different ethnicity from the profile foto.. It was wild. Especially for someone who's looking for dates and not hookups. Lots of unsolicited pictures.
    There's no love in fear.
    - Tool

    Do we want to remind you of something? Yes: the world is good and we belong here.
    - Richard Siken

  6. #6
    c'est la vie Obfuscate's Avatar
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    i have put up a profile maybe twice... one time for perhaps two months, and the second for at most a month... i didn't really know what to say about myself, so i am not sure what folks made of it... anyhow, i think it resulted in one person talking to me, and they kept wanting to make plans and then backing out until we both lost interest in doing anything... it all seemed like a lot of uncomfortable effort, for (in my case) very little reward... it all felt very superficial, and therefore somehow it accentuated how pointless it felt...

    tldr: sour grapes...

    post script:

    i am not the sort of person that dating site people want anyhow; i've reviewed the statistics...
    "giving a fuck is my dump stat"

  7. #7
    Mastermind Fieldmarshal Sacrophagus's Avatar
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    I met my first love online. We both joined a group of people from all walks of life to learn more about ourselves. I did it as a social experiment since meeting people for the sake of meeting them alone was alien to me at the time, while she did it, well, because she was crazy and fun.
    We ended up ditching them and we got together. There's that.

    Otherwise, I didn't use specific dating sites. I did meet women through Facebook and social media a lot. I also used some apps for the same purpose, but it is usually through a network of people I know.
    الخَيلُ وَاللَيلُ وَالبَيداءُ تَعرِفُني *** وَالسَيفُ وَالرُمحُ وَالقِرطاسُ وَالقَلَمُ
    Swift steeds, dreary nights, and the desolate wasteland, all know me full well
    As do the sword, the spear, the paper and the pen.

  8. #8
    Can't be satisfied. Peter Deadpan's Avatar
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    I did once. I ended up paired with someone who was a very complimentary match for me. Unfortunately, in the end, he had some significant anger issues, and I was struggling with piecing myself back together after an unhealthy marriage and during a nearly 2 year divorce, so we split.

    I would do it again, if I was looking, but I don't have high hopes because there were some real duds there...

    Edit: Yes, I used it once, solely for the purposes of finding a monogamous partner.
    Perpetual mood


    "It is not the personality's task to tell the truth,
    but to seem to, try to, or try to seem to."


    Philip Trussell


  9. #9
    👻 Ⓑ 👻 Ⓞ 👻 Ⓞ 👻 👻 👻 Luminous's Avatar
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    lol, this story is likely not very surprising. A long time ago, I signed up on one. I don't remember which one. I was extremely specific about what I wanted in a partner. Which got thousands of responses!

    hahaha No, it didn't get any responses. And I forgot about it. Until several years later, when I was living with my boyfriend, and I got a response! It was a lovely gentleman who wanted to help me by gently telling me how the information I had put up was not likely to get responses. We wished each other well, and that was that.

    But yeah... young INFP... list of Fi requirements.
    ✦ᏖᏒᎥᎮ ค ℓιɬɬℓɛ Ꮭıɠɧɬ ʄคŋɬคʂɬıƈ✦ -: ✦ :- ƒ O ᖇ G E ᗪ I ᑎ ƒ I ᖇ E ❋-: ✦ :-★ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ꜰᴇᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇᴇʟꜱ★
    * ・゚ ・゚ * ⊱9w1✶S✶2w1✶X✶5w6⊰ * ・゚ ・゚ *
    ✦Շђєяє คяє ๓σяє тнιηﻭѕ ιη нєανєη αη∂ єαятн Շђαη คяє ∂яєαмт σƒ ιη уσυя ρнιℓσѕσρну.✦

  10. #10
    Digital ambition Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    I tried at one period but all I got is "unhealthy people" so I quickly stopped. Although here dating sites don't contain too much people and you can quickly grasp the whole "offer" ... so if you aren't satisfied you can just leave. Especially since even that offer is still within mono-culture.

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