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  1. #1
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    Default Afraid of a Relationship

    If an INTJ really likes a person, but has been seriously hurt in the past can the INTJ put aside the feelings and not go beyond a friendship because of fear of repeating the past and not wanting to be hurt again?

  2. #2
    Softserve Ice Cream Agent Washington's Avatar
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    Yes
    There's no love in fear.
    - Tool

    Do we want to remind you of something? Yes: the world is good and we belong here.
    - Richard Siken
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  3. #3
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    No.
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  4. #4
    Queer Coded Cat The Cat's Avatar
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    I don't know if that's type related? But in my experience different folk react to things different. But I would think anyone regardless of type could react this way to a past hurt.
    I am the Cat who walks by themself; and all places are alike to me...

    For the cat is cryptic,
    and close to strange things which men cannot see.
    They are the soul of antique Aegyptus,
    and bearer of tales from forgotten cities in Meroë and Ophir.
    They are the kin of the jungle’s lords,
    and heir to the secrets of hoary and sinister Africa.
    The Sphinx is their cousin, and they speak her language;
    but they are more ancient than the Sphinx,
    and remember that which she hath forgotten...

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  5. #5
    Soul Reaver Mesmeric_Moon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by agentwashington View Post
    Yes
    Quote Originally Posted by Survive & Stay Free View Post
    No.
    Maybe.


    Seriously though:
    Type is not a valid excuse for shitty behavior.
    It's one thing if the person in question needs time to sort out what they're feeling and is upfront about it, but quite another to blame their behavior on being a certain type.


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  6. #6
    Softserve Ice Cream Agent Washington's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mesmeric_Moon View Post
    Maybe.


    Seriously though:
    Type is not a valid excuse for shitty behavior.
    It's one thing if the person in question needs time to sort out what they're feeling and is upfront about it, but quite another to blame their behavior on being a certain type.
    At this point I low key feel like responding with stuff from zodiac since the questions are so incredibly vague and general for all human behaviour that there's probably a good enough chance something like that would apply (there's a specific term for this psychological phenomena)

    But yeah


    I strongly suspect this is one of those case where more deets may be useful (i.e. if they are looking to understand a specific person's behaviour and look for corresponding input or support)
    There's no love in fear.
    - Tool

    Do we want to remind you of something? Yes: the world is good and we belong here.
    - Richard Siken

  7. #7
    Let me count the ways Betty Blue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTerran View Post
    If an INTJ really likes a person, but has been seriously hurt in the past can the INTJ put aside the feelings and not go beyond a friendship because of fear of repeating the past and not wanting to be hurt again?
    Of course. But agree it's not particularly type related. Anyone can bear the scars of a bad ending. Some types may be better at moving on though. Depends on how deep those scars are.
    "We knew he was someone who had a tragic flaw, that's where his greatness came from"
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  8. #8
    Senior Member Madboot's Avatar
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    I agree it is not type related, but if you are looking for one point of evidence for an INTJ getting over emotional pain, I have done so. I don't care to go into details at the moment, but I was heart broken in the distant past. I healed and moved on.
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  9. #9
    Phase-shifted beam Coriolis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by INTerran View Post
    If an INTJ really likes a person, but has been seriously hurt in the past can the INTJ put aside the feelings and not go beyond a friendship because of fear of repeating the past and not wanting to be hurt again?
    As others have already said, any type can do this. I do think INTJs are more likely that other types to do it, and are probably more effective and absolute about it when they do.
    Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth. ~ Buddha

  10. #10
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mesmeric_Moon View Post
    Maybe.


    Seriously though:
    Type is not a valid excuse for shitty behavior.
    It's one thing if the person in question needs time to sort out what they're feeling and is upfront about it, but quite another to blame their behavior on being a certain type.
    there are people of every single type that are shitty people. just like there are people of every single type that are decent people, some are even good.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so :hi:
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