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Fallen In Love?

Mole

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Even things lacking solid evidence can prove useful in their own way. So long as they aren’t looked at in terms of solid, static absolutes, since they certainly don’t fit that criteria. I figure it goes unsaid that humans are more complex than language allows for us to describe. There are many ways to go about understanding patterns of behavior, thinking, feeling, etc. Some don’t necessarily have to be concrete to have value. It’s all in how you use it.

As my cat might say if he could speak English... “Boxes sure can fun to explore- just please don’t seal it while I’m inside.”

There is a discipline called Psychometrics. Psychometricians gain a graduate degree in a Psychology Department of a registered university. And just as there are no astrologers with graduate degrees from Astronomy Departments of any university, so there are no mbti practitioners with graduate degrees from any Psychology Department in any university.

Rather mbti and astrology provide consolation for those who have regressed to fantasy.
 

Lexicon

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Rather mbti and astrology provide consolation for those who have regressed to fantasy.

A little fantasy in life can be enriching, Mole. ;)

Besides, if you read the article I linked, you’d see that all the emotions described, regardless of type, are valid across the board when it comes to falling in love. That was my primary reason for posting it. The descriptions of how it feels for people when they ‘know’ they’re in love. Just happened to be broken down by MBTI type, but it doesn’t have to be looked at categorically to have value. If you do not value that system, then simply look at the feelings beyond it.
 

Mole

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A little fantasy in life can be enriching, Mole. ;)

Besides, if you read the article I linked, you’d see that all the emotions described, regardless of type, are valid across the board when it comes to falling in love. That was my primary reason for posting it. The descriptions of how it feels for people when they ‘know’ they’re in love. Just happened to be bTroken down by MBTI type, but it doesn’t have to be looked at categorically to have value. If you do not value that system, then simply look at the feelings beyond it.

The easiest thing in the world is to deceive ourselves, particularly about our feelings. The whole edifice of science is based on the fact that our perceptions ae not to be trusted.
 

Lexicon

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The easiest thing in the world is to deceive ourselves, particularly about our feelings. The whole edifice of science is based on the fact that our perceptions ae not to be trusted.

This is exactly what makes love so beautifully complex. Defies all measure. Containment. Reason. To be sure, it’s got an intoxicating quality that can cloud judgement. In that context, it’s always worthwhile to take that into account, and reflect upon our feelings, to whatever extent possible.
 

Starry

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Easy. It’s once they start treating me like I’m worthless...that’s when l know I’m hooked.
 

EcK

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Even things lacking solid evidence can prove useful in their own way. So long as they aren’t looked at in terms of solid, static absolutes, since they certainly don’t fit that criteria. I figure it goes unsaid that humans are more complex than language allows for us to describe. There are many ways to go about understanding patterns of behavior, thinking, feeling, etc. Some don’t necessarily have to be concrete to have value. It’s all in how you use it.

As my cat might say if he could speak English... “Boxes sure can fun to explore- just please don’t seal it while I’m inside.”

The trick is to burn the box.
 

EcK

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Though this is still rather applicable across the board, I thought this was interesting.

While I personally reject the concept of a soul or soulmate- the phrasing aside- I found the INFJ description very relatable, in terms of what is the most vital internal indicator that I've found a good partner. Ignoring all the usual stuff in these articles that blow smoke up INFJ’s asses about how special (etc) they are, of course. The feeling described is accurate, for me.

Others may connect with theirs. I think most of the values described could be said for anyone regardless of type. I guess it’s just a matter of which might stand out to you the most.

The Myers Briggs Guide to Knowing You’ve Found Your Soulmate | Observer

The real question I got regarding this article is the cover picture.

Who has the skinniest jeans?

loic-djim-226086.jpg
 

EcK

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Matching fucking ugly ass blindingly white sneakers? What did one of their moms dress them?

wow man, not cool. Dissing shoes? What next, are you going to joke about orphans too ?
 

Lexicon

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The trick is to burn the box.

We’ve been over this, bear. Schrödinger’s cat is a *thought* experiment.
And that’s not even how you’d do it, anyway. :doh:

 

Lexicon

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If there’s a duo of orphans sporting obnoxious matching white sneakers- absolutely.

If there’s a duo of orphans in matching white sneakers, they’re likely very much in love.
And probably trapped in a 1970s sitcom. Or an off broadway-production based on a 1970s sitcom.
 
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If there’s a duo of orphans in matching white sneakers, they’re likely very much in love.
And probably trapped in a 1970s sitcom. Or an off broadway-production based on a 1970s sitcom.

Diff’rent Strokes the musical? Wait, they were brothers.
 

ChocolateMoose123

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Simple question...how do you know when you have fallen in love with someone? Not lust or infatuation, but all the way, genuine love? What is/was that like for you? How were you around the object of your affection?

All the stuff and "rules" that you hear about dating go out the window. They are trivial when you have mutual affection and desire to know each other better.
Basically, all those dating tips, books, assume a one-sided affection when you really think about it. It's why they fail mostly. Why people who talk about the love of their lives say it blindsided them or they weren't expecting it because they weren't following shit guidance. Love isn't about leveraging one sided affection to gain more. Which is what we are inundated with. Seduction. Allure.

Love just comes at you honestly and sincerely. The hard part comes in small increments where you have now included that person in your life, your choices, your heart and must navigate the world together. That's the hard part and the great part of loving someone. It's not superficial bullshit like what is sold to us.

That's how I knew what love was. When I realized it was everything I wasn't told it should be.
 

Forever

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Maybe someday I'll hope to find true love.

Or she does already love me, but I don't think I could be so naïve.
 

Betty Blue

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Oh, it's this time again....

lets type love

Triangular_Theory_of_Love.svg-570c79933df78c7d9e14dd9a.png


probably experienced all those and further combinations

 

Mole

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We have discovered we fall in love across most if not all different cultures. This mean natural selection has selected us to fall in love. And nature doesn't do this out of the goodness of her heart, rather she wants to reproduce, and once she has achieved this she allows us to fall out of love. So we can't talk about falling in love without talking about falling out of love.

Artistically we have dealt with this seeming paradox by celebrating the falling in, and dealing with the falling out, by having both lovers die before they can fall out. This is perfectly illustrated by Romeo and Juliette our iconic lovers, both who die before they can fall out of love. And in countless movies such as, "Love Means Never Having to Say You're Sorry".

This has led some to say love and death are two sides of the same coin.

This puts us under a big strain, where we must focus only on love and repress any knowledge of death.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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It's oxytocin and there are evolutionary reasons for why it creates attachment during sex, pregnancy, shared stress, and other social bonding incidences.

"Oxytocin is a powerful hormone released by men and women during orgasm. It probably deepens the feelings of attachment and makes couples feel much closer to one another after they have had sex. The theory goes that the more sex a couple has, the deeper their bond becomes."

More from where I got that...


This also puts an interesting perspective on bad relationships where people keep talking about the relationship over and over to try to fix it. Perhaps the solution is actually more simple.
 

INTJMom

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Simple question...how do you know when you have fallen in love with someone? Not lust or infatuation, but all the way, genuine love? What is/was that like for you? How were you around the object of your affection?
I was in love once.
The more I got to know him, the more I realized I didn't want to live without him.
He made me feel safe.
I trusted him with my life.
 
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