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  1. #1
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    Default Things Romantic Movies Get Wrong About Relationships

    Pop media does not always portray realistic relationships. Most romantic stories are written to make viewers empathetic, but are often just made-up fantasies. Sure, you might see a boy chasing after a girl in a subway, like they do in movies; but unlike in movies, they don’t usually end with a kiss. In real life, it ends with a restraining order against the guy. That’s just one thing that romantic movies get wrong about relationships.

    Another example is how there always has to be a third party, a rival for true love, a love triangle. Romantic movies introduce such characters in order to add tension and conflict (which I understand are needed to tell an engaging story), but most real-life relationships are already beset by common problems such as debt, bills, and whose turn is it to take out the trash. Not all real-life relationships have a love triangle, and if some do, then it’s usually resolved during the courtship stage.

    Speaking of debt and bills, why is it that there’s always a difference in status between the couple? Like how the guy is a rich, pampered descendant of a Welsh royal—King Arthur himself even—and the girl is just from down the corner of Edison, New Jersey, or vice versa. It just adds more fantasy to the story.

    But despite all of my gripes about what romantic movies get wrong about relationships, I still enjoy watching them. I have fun rooting for the guy chasing for the girl in the subway. I celebrate when the guy triumphs over the rival and wins the girl’s hand. I swoon when the man of lordly caliber sweeps the pauper girl off of her feet and marries her despite the gap in their station. I enjoy romantic movies for what they are—made-up fantasies.

    Do you have any suggestions on good romantic movies that portray relationships realistically? Let me know.
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  2. #2
    Junior Member equinoxx's Avatar
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    Ugh. I could go on forever about how much I hate the way romance is portrayed in the media.

    Romantic relationships are shown to be magical, of utmost importance, extremely intense, and basically the "center" of life. Romance is often put up on a pedestal above other types of relationships. Many protagonists in movies will put aside everything for their budding romance and their romantic partner. They won't listen to their friends & family, they'll forget about their own passions and dreams, they'll leave their life behind... all for their beloved. Movies often portray love as something consuming.... if you love someone, you think about them 24/7, sacrifice yourself for them, revolve your entire life around them, spend every waking moment with them...

    ...and this is portrayed so often that this is most people's idea of a "perfect" romantic relationship, but I don't know. I don't see it as healthy.

    The strong "love" shown in movies isn't always exactly love, it's infatuation. Sure, this infatuation will linger during the "honeymoon phase" at the beginning of a relationship. But the phase doesn't last forever in the way that the movies make it seem. Of course, excitement can last in a long-term relationship, but it takes work to keep it there. And a relationship isn't always going to be all lovey-dovey, kisses & hugs, butterflies & fireworks... Seeing each other's ugly sides is important, too.

    Also, your partner should not consume your entire life. I don't know why this is portrayed so much in the media. It's not healthy. A couple needs space now & then to keep the relationship healthy.

    As much as I enjoy romance, I think both the good & bad sides of love need to be shown more in movies & TV shows. Romantic gestures and kisses are nice, but I want to see a couple who sits on the couch in PJ's together looking like a mess, zoning out and watching TV, barely speaking to each other, but still enjoying each other's presence. A couple that argues, but doesn't make it into the end of the world; at the end of the day, they still crawl into bed together and kiss goodnight. Also, couples who focus more on the "growth" aspects of their relationship rather than physical affection & nothing else. There's much more to a relationship than being touchy-feely and saying "I love you".

    Sorry for the rant, this is just something I think about a lot haha
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  3. #3

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    Things romantic movies get wrong about relationships: almost everything.
    Likes Yuu, Madboot, 21% liked this post

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