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ISTP&ESFJ how to communicate my frustration to an ISTP?

redpikmin97

New member
Joined
Dec 30, 2016
Messages
8
Hello guys! So as what you've known me and my boyfriend just got back together and we were doing absolutely fine. He said he wants us back and we can work it out together and he really do loves me so much and want to spend his lifetime with me (that he wasn't sure about thats why we broke up). Moving on, The only problem is there is this one time that I get to open his facebook account with the new switch account option in the messenger app, it wasn't really intentional just wanted to see if it would work. Then I saw him talking to our friend and I was like yeah okay and when I was about to switch it again I saw him sent a porn video to the friend and Im okay with that since that is normal to guys. The only problem is he sent this explanation that that is the girl they met on tinder and he started chatting with her turns out the girl is literally crazy she has a schizoprenia and multiple personality disorder, she's masturbating on the cam and has her own playlist and stuff of her masturbating. Then my boyfriend explained to his friend that he doesn't liker her, just interested in her cause my boyfriend like psych stuff and he said he wonders how the girl talks or acts. Then I saw that the girl is asking him to masturbate for her and he didn't do it but still added her on skype. So I don't know what happened and don't want to know. I want to communicate this to him but we just got back together and I'm thinking that he thinks it aint wrong cause there is no emotional attachment bet. the girl and him or he thinks its not cheating cause he doesn't like the girl cause he even said no she straight up crazy. but the fact that they are talking still cause fucking tinder and that the girl asked him that, that is already cheating..
Also there is this one chat with the same friendand my bf telling him that "Oh I got back with my girl" and the friend was like "yeah she was venting on me" but I wasnt I was just literally congratulating him and his gf for passing the NCLEX and then the friend said "maybe she wanted me on her side but bros before hoes" and then he said "now its cool i can do anything i want at any time and its chill with her. lets see how long it lasts, we were supposed to mert up tomorrow but I cancelled it because you guys planned a trip" and the guy was like "shii bro thats bad ass" and he was like "yeah dude don't forget the fetishes she does it for me even i made an excuse that i wanna be with someone else. evil bro" and the friend replied "damn you're messing with her heart" and my bf was like "its aight, I really love her though i think its gonna be long till another fight kicks in"
with this i feel used, i feel betrayed. He says he loves me but gets to do this kinda stuff. I'm trying to get into his way of thinking, in his own perveption. Help
How will I communicate this frustration with him without attacking his vulnerable Fe side cause he hates that? Like how should I talk to him I know it should be logical but thats my weakest im an ESFJ but I can try I just don't know how to say it to him. He is willing for us to develop an open communication, the honesty and stuff I mean I give him clues about it but he still doesn't admit it I guess cause he thinks he has nothing to gain.
 
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