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ESFP and ISFP Relationships

Masokissed

Spoiled Brat 🍒
Joined
Apr 22, 2015
Messages
941
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Didn't notice this one on here yet so let's give it a shot.

What do you think about relationships between ESFPs and ISFPs? The focus of this is really on romantic relationships but it also makes sense to discuss your experience in situations where these two types interact in a significant way – such as friendship, at work, etc.

When it’s working – What are the joys and positive aspects of these relationships?
- How compatible do you think these two types are in general?
- Why are they attracted to each other?
- How do they compliment each other?
- How well do they understand each other and why?
- What are they like together raising children?

When it’s not working – What are the challenges when two people of this type are in a relationship?
- What are some of the communication challenges they can have?
- What are the biggest frustrations between these two types?
- How can they take each other for granted?
- What happens with things “go wrong” between these two types?

Advice for couples – What recommendations do you have?
- What things should each type do to facilitate better communication?
- What advice do you have for each of the two types?
- If you are an ESFP, what advice do you have for the ISFPs?
- If you are an ISFP, what advice do you have for the ESFPs?
 

Masokissed

Spoiled Brat 🍒
Joined
Apr 22, 2015
Messages
941
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
ISFPs are really sexy to me and I get huge crushes on them, but they're bipolar as fuck and it's what ultimately ends it for me. One day they seem so into me, but the next they're withdrawn and icy. But it's fun playing these games with them. A lot of them seem more sure about their conclusions than me and I love it but it's also what makes us fight because sometimes they're too sure. They're sweet too... not as double-crossing as me.

I wish they'd be more open about their feelings, though. Not that I am, but because of my extaversion it's much easier to tell if I genuinely like someone than it is with them. But if they withdraw their interest because they're thinking over shit I withdraw just as much so maybe that's where communication can go bad. And if the relationship goes bad, then it's because I think they're being passive aggressive "holier-than-thou" bitches.
 

ceecee

Coolatta® Enjoyer
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
15,908
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
I can't imagine any of this going well. In fact, I'm beginning to think that ISFP and any EF is going to be a problem. Exceptions apply of course but I just can't see this ending well.
 

Masokissed

Spoiled Brat 🍒
Joined
Apr 22, 2015
Messages
941
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
7w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
[MENTION=17945]Nixie[/MENTION] Let's date. Just in this thread. For science.
 

Dreamer

Potential is My Addiction
Joined
Jul 26, 2015
Messages
4,539
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
794
I feel like they're may be some similar difficulties between ENFPs and INFPs. At least to me, I love INFPs, but at the same time, not (romantically). Friendship is totally doable. It must be an Fi dom versus Aux thing.

Not to steer the convo elsewhere, continue please :D
 

strychnine

All Natural! All Good!
Joined
Jun 23, 2010
Messages
895
A lot of them seem more sure about their conclusions than me and I love it but it's also what makes us fight because sometimes they're too sure.

This is EXACTLY the issue I have with ISFPs, as well as INFPs. They judge too much and perceive little. Too Rational. I bet they see me as too Irrational, LOL, perceiving too much and judging too little.

As [MENTION=25763]Enthusiastic_Dreamer[/MENTION] said, I think it's an Fi>Se vs. Se>Fi thing. I imagine NFPs have a similar issue.

I'd do better with an ISTJ, I think, if I wanted an ISxx type. ISFJ would be a good match for me too. ISxJs are also dominant perceivers, as they lead with Si, so I can see that going much better. Despite stupid SJ stereotypes, I don't find them judgmental at all, but quite easygoing; again, they perceive first and judge later, unlike IxFPs.
 

Dreamer

Potential is My Addiction
Joined
Jul 26, 2015
Messages
4,539
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
794
This is EXACTLY the issue I have with ISFPs, as well as INFPs. They judge too much and perceive little. Too Rational. I bet they see me as too Irrational, LOL, perceiving too much and judging too little.

As [MENTION=25763]Enthusiastic_Dreamer[/MENTION] said, I think it's an Fi>Se vs. Se>Fi thing. I imagine NFPs have a similar issue.

I'd do better with an ISTJ, I think, if I wanted an ISxx type. ISFJ would be a good match for me too. ISxJs are also dominant perceivers, as they lead with Si, so I can see that going much better. Despite stupid SJ stereotypes, I don't find them judgmental at all, but quite easygoing; again, they perceive first and judge later, unlike IxFPs.

Ya, I run into that issue as well, of certain types being too quick to judge for my taste. Too quick to shut down an idea, too quick to pass judgement on people, this and that. Perhaps those with a dominant judging function could learn a thing or two from us auxiliary users :newwink:
 
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