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  1. #51
    Dream without Hesitation Dreamer's Avatar
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    Jul 2015
    974 so/sp
    IEE Ne


    Quote Originally Posted by Vulcan View Post
    I generally think it's a good idea to trust your spidey sense.
    True that. I do find I tend to get into trouble more often when I put my intuition or gut feeling aside for my version of logical and analytic thought.
    The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams
    -Eleanor Roosevelt

    ~Always, an Enthusiastic_Dreamer

  2. #52
    blackbird, fly Julius_Van_Der_Beak's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    5w6 sp/so
    LII None


    Quote Originally Posted by Enthusiastic_Dreamer View Post
    True that. I do find I tend to get into trouble more often when I put my intuition or gut feeling aside for my version of logical and analytic thought.
    I've had the same problem.
    Likes chubber, N/A liked this post

  3. #53
    Senior Member Nonsensical's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008


    My first long term relationship was with an INTJ who had some weird emotional issues due to family problems.

    Pros of our relationship:
    -the "opposites attract" phenomenon; our personalities infatuated eachother. I expressed it more, she was less expressive about it but I knew it was there.
    -When we did communicate, it was often effective communication
    -When she was upset, Fi really came in handy. (it's a relief function for INTJs, I believe).

    Cons of our relationship.
    -oh boy....where to start
    -To put it bluntly: she was super cold and not affectionate enough for me at times
    -I felt under appreciated
    -Communication was bad at times. She had a tendency of keeping things from me that she did not want to deal with. She was incredibly hardworking when it came to her career and would seldom expend energy and time to devote to dealing with relationship issues. It was characteristic of her to brush them under the rug and keep me in the dark.
    -she cared a whole lot more about building herself up socially and professionally than I did. I wanted to focus on US and didn't give a fuck about our social/professional reputation or whatever she was interested in. I could care less about what people think of me/my relationship, but I think our collective "image" was very important to her.

    Reflection: It wasn't a very healthy relationship but that doesn't have much to do with Types. She was very emotionally developed, whereas I was very very emotionally and romantically focused. She was concerned with pursuing different things than I was when we dated (social status, prestige, social image, wealth, etc., whereas I was pretty much just focused on her). However, looking back at the beginning of our relationship and the chemistry that brought us together, I can say without a doubt that the compatibility between our personalities was like crack-cocaine for me. It'd keep me up late at night thinking and wondering about her. I was intrigued and mystified by her introversion and complexity and it literally made me feel "drunk in love". I was utterly infatuated. Didn't work out though.

    I've been dating an ISFP for the last 2 years. We have the same values and desires and I think that weighs a lot more than types do in a relationship. I intuit that we will probably get married.

  4. #54
    Junior Member Connoisseur's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2019


    What I appreciate about them as an INTJ:
    - They always come off as having a good experience (even if they don't mean to)- so they don't trigger any "am I making them uncomfortable" insecurities.
    - Overjoyed about many weird things we happen to discuss- sometimes rekindles my faith in humanity.
    - They can inspire me to come out of my shell or even do the talking for me in social settings.
    - They say good things about you to other people- e.g. my ENFP manager spreading the news that I was some kind of wunderkind employee, or some ENFP girl at the party mentioning to everyone they meet that I'm cool- I rarely advertise myself that much and they are VERY good at filling that void with their exaggerations.
    - Maintain a very light-hearted atmosphere, hard to be too neurotic around them.

    The pitfalls:
    - Not enough Ti on their part- they often times just parrot what other people say (and less discriminate about their sources than myself).
    - Even if they're TEMPORARILY excited about something, they don't seem to be "serious" about those interests enough for me to discuss deeper things I really care about- and so we just joke around about "lighter" topics.
    - Some of them come across as so fake, only doing things that contribute to "good PR".

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