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How compatible are INTP male-INTJ female?

INTerran

Member
Joined
Oct 29, 2016
Messages
131
[MENTION=35211]Warrior[/MENTION] I hope some INTJ women will respond here. Based on observation I'd say the type is rather direct in communication, and likes to know the terms of a relationship without any game playing or nonsense. I think that deep connections can last for a long time, so if this person is very important to you, it would be worth establishing a friendship or whatever kind of connection fits with your culture and personal plans. I've always known romantic partners for a few years as friends before getting involved romantically. It's true my relationships did not turn out so great in the end, but I don't see any problem moving from friendship to relationship. It is helpful to have a lot of communication established before the emotional intensity of sexual involvement is added to the picture with all the bonding chemicals it adds to the mix. I think having that friendship established makes the romantic relationship stronger because in older age many people go back to essentially a friendship even during their marriages. I think NT connect primarily with the mind and ideas, so I don't see why you wouldn't begin there even if you had to wait a few years for romantic involvement.

My relationship is reversed. Female INTP with male INTJ, but the dynamics are quite similar. We spent time together for three and a half years building a deep, trusting friendship. We only recently decided to try a romantic relationship, adding in some physical aspects. We sat down and talked through the obvious pitfalls if it didn't end well due to our families being very close. That honest, straightforward communication was essential to help both of us feel ok moving forward in our relationship. And so far, the connection between us has only gotten stronger.
I know and understand him and accept him exactly like he is. Those three and a half years of friendship I wouldn't trade anything in the world for. It created a firm foundation of mutual respect, trust, affection.
 

INTerran

Member
Joined
Oct 29, 2016
Messages
131
Really? I've been married to an INTP for years. Everyone I have ever dated has started off as a friend first, so I agree with the advice to get to know each other slowly, as friends. Relationships with either type can take long to develop, so these two types are likely to be on the same page about that and not mind going very slowly.
Going slowly has been the best thing for my relationship with Mr. INTJ. We have finally decided to have a go at a romantic relationship, adding in some physical connection. It has been the easiest transition because we are very comfortable with each other, have mutual respect for one another, and a natural affection that lends itself well to a romantic relationship. The time getting to really know and understand him was time well spent.
 

The Cat

Just a Magic Cat who hangs out at the Crossroads.
Staff member
Joined
Oct 15, 2016
Messages
23,650
onvIdai.jpg

Tell me about it Perry.:mellow:
 

Peter Deadpan

phallus impudicus
Joined
Dec 14, 2016
Messages
8,882
Depends first and foremost on if they are both correctly typed.
Spoiler alert: They aren't.
 

Julius_Van_Der_Beak

Two-Headed Boy
Joined
Jul 24, 2008
Messages
19,602
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Really? I've been married to an INTP for years.eel

Everyone I have ever dated has started off as a friend first, so I agree with the advice to get to know each other slowly, as friends. Relationships with either type can take long to develop, so these two types are likely to be on the same page about that and not mind going very slowly.

You know, I think you might be on to something. Not sure if the person I've been seeing is an INTJ (though INT of some type would not surprise me). But the thing is, it's moving along slowly and I'm definitely happy with that. I actually really like that I don't feel pressured to always move things to the next milestone.
 
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