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Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts Confused about my instinctual variants

sonečka

New member
Joined
Dec 8, 2016
Messages
13
MBTI Type
INXX
Enneagram
459
That's a few reasons why I can identify with each instinctual variant.
So: I think in terms of communities and how they relate to me as an individual. I'm overly sensitive to people's opinion and how we interweave. I collect and grow to convey a message. But... I don't want to be part of any community. I want to shine over them and leave. I almost take for granted that I have so in my instinctual stacking.
Sp: I'm very protective of my space, affected by the aesthetic appearence and the order of things. I have an hypersensitive body, a good link between the external and the internal world, and I take care of it in order to avoid the pain. I'm overly cautious and reserved. But... I have no practical sense, the internal tension to grow up for myself is something I miss. I want to grow up to be finally absorbed and leave myself.
Sx: my spine. I feel like I need it. I want the connection but I miss it. I'm deeply competitive. I remember what was being constantly absorbed during the childhood. I love intimacy and beauty, but maybe in a sp way: I'm dependent by the physical state of love, the body only gets completed. The mind stay detatched, frustrated, always: things run away over my eyes. But the more they run, the more I cease living.

I'm almost for sure a 4. Maybe a 9. 495 or 459. I relate to social instinct. I relate to sexual 4 but not sexual instinct. I relate to self preservation instinct but not sp 4. What am I?
 

Neokortex

New member
Joined
Sep 4, 2016
Messages
186
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
461
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Could be some kind of Sp/So. Sx coupled with Sp leads to a grittier, darker, uglier aesthetic. It's not optimism or idealism in terms of surface social grace, being able to rely on others and escape seeing things from the bottom (underbelly), but rather that, seeing things from the outsider position, having to cope with life alone with sinister survival prospects, more focus on the aesthetics of degradation, of entropy. I guess Sp/Sx heart types (2's optimism, 3's ambition) may be more colorful, though.
 
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