Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts What are activities that you would associate with each enneagram variant?

[brainheart]

Even then, I see a lot of the so/sx types bouncing around and trying to get to know everyone in the new group.

I think that's true if it's a group they're interested in being a part of. Otherwise, not so much. I think the bouncing around to get to know everyone is more specific to social variant + Fe.

 

[The Great One]

[MENTION=15607]The Great One[/MENTION], That would be some confused, growing and changing and flickering sp, which I actually thought of already as I typed my response to you. But so am I. I'm beginning to taste this food for thought. Maybe.

Well you said that you keep people at an arm's length and then get close to them gradually. This is more of a sp/sx style of connection.

What separates Sx/So interaction styles from So/Sx? Is it a more whimsical and less commited/attentive version of So/Sx?

Well I thought about it, and I believe that I have an answer for you (especially when it comes to mating). In a group the so/sx will go to sexual (their secondary variant) when interacting: they will bounce around a group or social scene and talk to everyone, until they then come across one special person and really just focus their attention on that person for a while. Often times they will bond intensely one-on-one with this individual for a while and focus on this person as opposed to the rest of the group (their regular focus). They then will maybe go on some one-on-one dates with this person for a while, and get even closer to them. Once they feel close enough to this person, they will then introduce them to their little "clicks" that they hang out with. At this point the so/sx person will kind of alternate between hanging out with their lover one-on-one and hanging out with them at the same time as hanging out with their click.

The sx/so on the other hand is different. The sx/so's natural impulse is to bond one-on-one, but when trying to mate, the sx/so will go to their secondary variant (social) in order to achieve a mate. They will basically approach the group and basically win-over the entire group and dazzle them all in order to win-over their lover. They are exhibitionists per say. This is how Jim Jones was able to get a large group of people to commit a mass-suicide. Anyway, after the sx/so wins over the entire group, they then focus on the person whom was the object of their affection in the first place, and then bonds one-on-one with them. The sx/so prefers to bond one-on-one from now on with their lover at this point.

 

[Stansmith]

Well you said that you keep people at an arm's length and then get close to them gradually. This is more of a sp/sx style of connection.



Well I thought about it, and I believe that I have an answer for you (especially when it comes to mating). In a group the so/sx will go to sexual (their secondary variant) when interacting: they will bounce around a group or social scene and talk to everyone, until they then come across one special person and really just focus their attention on that person for a while. Often times they will bond intensely one-on-one with this individual for a while and focus on this person as opposed to the rest of the group (their regular focus). They then will maybe go on some one-on-one dates with this person for a while, and get even closer to them. Once they feel close enough to this person, they will then introduce them to their little "clicks" that they hang out with. At this point the so/sx person will kind of alternate between hanging out with their lover one-on-one and hanging out with them at the same time as hanging out with their click.

The sx/so on the other hand is different. The sx/so's natural impulse is to bond one-on-one, but when trying to mate, the sx/so will go to their secondary variant (social) in order to achieve a mate. They will basically approach the group and basically win-over the entire group and dazzle them all in order to win-over their lover. They are exhibitionists per say. This is how Jim Jones was able to get a large group of people to commit a mass-suicide. Anyway, after the sx/so wins over the entire group, they then focus on the person whom was the object of their affection in the first place, and then bonds one-on-one with them. The sx/so prefers to bond one-on-one from now on with their lover at this point.

I can't see myself ever bringing my SO into my "click". I see a relationship with a girl as a completely one-on-one thing. I think the search for that one relationship is more important to me than the social group I'm involved in. But at the same time, I feel like I'm in a more anti-So mood now than I maybe was when I was healthier, so that may be clouding my judgement.

 

[Lady_X]

Well you said that you keep people at an arm's length and then get close to them gradually. This is more of a sp/sx style of connection.



Well I thought about it, and I believe that I have an answer for you (especially when it comes to mating). In a group the so/sx will go to sexual (their secondary variant) when interacting: they will bounce around a group or social scene and talk to everyone, until they then come across one special person and really just focus their attention on that person for a while. Often times they will bond intensely one-on-one with this individual for a while and focus on this person as opposed to the rest of the group (their regular focus). They then will maybe go on some one-on-one dates with this person for a while, and get even closer to them. Once they feel close enough to this person, they will then introduce them to their little "clicks" that they hang out with. At this point the so/sx person will kind of alternate between hanging out with their lover one-on-one and hanging out with them at the same time as hanging out with their click.

The sx/so on the other hand is different. The sx/so's natural impulse is to bond one-on-one, but when trying to mate, the sx/so will go to their secondary variant (social) in order to achieve a mate. They will basically approach the group and basically win-over the entire group and dazzle them all in order to win-over their lover. They are exhibitionists per say. This is how Jim Jones was able to get a large group of people to commit a mass-suicide. Anyway, after the sx/so wins over the entire group, they then focus on the person whom was the object of their affection in the first place, and then bonds one-on-one with them. The sx/so prefers to bond one-on-one from now on with their lover at this point.

i remember reading that too...do you remember what they said the sx/sp does?

 

[The Great One]

I can't see myself ever bringing my SO into my "click". I see a relationship with a girl as a completely one-on-one thing. I think the search for that one relationship is more important to me than the social group I'm involved in. But at the same time, I feel like I'm in a more anti-So mood now than I maybe was when I was healthier, so that may be clouding my judgement.

Thank you for adding this. I probably understand the social first types less than any other type, so this helps me to understand them a bit better.

i remember reading that too...do you remember what they said the sx/sp does?

Sp/sx and sx/sp

The sexual/self-preservation and self-preservation/sexual types tend to have a very one on one style of seduction. Many times they don't like to seduce people through social groups. However sometimes in a social group they will pull aside a person away from everyone else and have a one on one interaction with an individual. It should be well noted that the sx/sp and sp/sx styles of seductions almost always work best one on one. They will quickly create an intense bond between just them and the other individual. The sx/sp and sp/sx style of seduction tends to be very subtle as well and doesn't really come off as in your face.