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Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts Instinctual Stacking and Love Language

What is your Primary Instinctual Variant and Primary Love Language?

  • Sx and my primary LL is Gifts

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • So and my primary LL is Physical Touch

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • So and my primary LL is Gifts

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • So and my primary LL is Acts of Service

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Sp and my primary LL is Gifts

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    60

Mia.

New member
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
821
Just thought it would be fun to see if there is any correlation between one’s primary love language and primary instinctual variant.

Here’s the love language test: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/

I’m sx and I always tie between quality time and words of affirmation, with physical touch a very close second (I guess as an sx I might be greedy in terms of these three? :devil:) The other two are much farther down the line, but gifts is way above acts of service, which hardly registers at all.

Feel free to discuss. :D

Don't forget to vote.
 

SoraMayhem

defying your expectations
Joined
Jun 7, 2012
Messages
344
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I'm sp/sx and I'm tied with quality time and physical touch, acts of service being a close third.
 

Phoenix

New member
Joined
Jul 31, 2011
Messages
328
MBTI Type
XNTX
Enneagram
1w2
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Hmm .. I'm an sx/sp and my love language is: 1. Words of Affirmation, 2. Quality time, 3 Acts of servitude.

I'm also a 3w4 and therefore words of affirmation makes perfect sense with regards to why it's my highest. My need for validation is very high.
 

Mia.

New member
Joined
Jan 4, 2012
Messages
821
Don't forget to vote guys. We need it for research purposes and.... stuff.
 

SoraMayhem

defying your expectations
Joined
Jun 7, 2012
Messages
344
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Funny that no sp types have acts of service in the lead, that would be my guess.
Sx, I would imagine to be physical touch, and so probably quality time. :shrug:
 

Winds of Thor

New member
Joined
Jan 11, 2009
Messages
1,842
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
3w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I didn't vote but I'll put my things here.

I'm Sx dom.
Quality Time and Physical Touch are highest. Then Acts of Service and Words of Affirmation are very closely second, with WOA being one point less. Then Gifts almost insignificant with 1 point.

I didn't feel voting did the other areas enough service so I didn't vote.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
50,187
MBTI Type
BELF
Enneagram
594
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Sx or sx/sp, (1) quality time and (2) touch.
 

Forever_Jung

Active member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
2,644
MBTI Type
ESFJ
sp/sx: My top 3 were really close

1. Quality Time
2. Touch
3. Words of Affirmation

And the gift/practical categories were almost empty

I notice that sp subtypes have voted for my top three, but not for my bottom two. A pattern seems to be emerging, but it's too early to say.
 

Trunks

I'm not Trunks
Joined
Feb 1, 2012
Messages
333
I'm sp/sx and I know what I want:
1. Words of affirmation
2. Quality time
3. Physical touch

Words of affirmation is my priority..I dislike being in the position of uncertainty..
 

Such Irony

Honor Thy Inferior
Joined
Jul 23, 2010
Messages
5,059
MBTI Type
INtp
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
10 Words of Affirmation

10 Quality Time

3 Receiving Gifts

5 Acts of Service

2 Physical Touch

I think I'm either SP or SO variant.
 

gromit

likes this
Joined
Mar 3, 2010
Messages
6,508
I'm sp/sx and I know what I want:
1. Words of affirmation
2. Quality time
3. Physical touch

Words of affirmation is my priority..I dislike being in the position of uncertainty..

Ah I think I am also sp/sx, and mine are similar. Quality Time, then Physical Touch, then Words of Affirmation. But really, I like all of the love languages.
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
It's practically a 3-way tie for me between quality time, physical touch and receiving gifts, all of them to me can indicate love.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Sx-so here. Physical Touch is vital to me, with Words of Affirmation as a close second and Quality time not far behind.
 

CzeCze

RETIRED
Joined
Sep 11, 2007
Messages
8,975
MBTI Type
GONE
When I think "acts of service" it reminds me of 2 separate ISFJs (who don't really know each other at all) who took time to clean someone's oven as a show of love. In one case, it was a daughter who routinely does this for her mom when she visits. In another, it was a guy trying to win the affection of another guy. Personally, I didn't get this myself, as in acts of service are not really how I primarily show love. I would be more likely to pick up sweets or snacks that I know someone likes and are hard to get or agree to go to some show or event that I don't really want to go to. I remember an INFP I dated I think showed love this way too, but often would not necessarily state "this is a pain in the ass for me, but I'm doing it for you because I like you". I think this led to the problem later of her feeling like I was unappreciative, but honestly, I didn't know she was doing any of this stuff 'out of love'.

My results:

8 Words of Affirmation
9 Quality Time
2 Receiving Gifts
6 Acts of Service
5 Physical Touch

Funny thing is, "GIVING gifts" is a big one of mine to show life/affection/etc. Maybe it's Ne but if I see something and it reminds me of someone or I know "they'd love it" I want to buy it and give it. Not big expensive gives, but thoughtful, heck "cute" gifts that will be appreciated and will resonate with that person. Physical touch from friends and family is not so needed, but absolutely from a partner. I guess all my physical touch needs are fulfilled by a partner...and pets. :alttongue: And yes, I do acts of service for others too. I see those more as a duty thing and those things don't/shouldn't call attention/require thanks. It's my Asian upbringing. :thelook:

Quality Time to me is giving the best of yourself fully to someone/some people/a period in time. It is the way I primarily enjoy showing and being shown loyalty, commitment, and affection from friends and lovers. Along with 'words of affirmation'. I guess I assumed that was most people though, as "hanging out" and "chatting" are the two main ways people become friends and lovers??

so/sx
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
Staff member
Joined
Apr 18, 2010
Messages
27,230
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I'm sp/sx and prefer quality time first, acts of service second.
 

Reverie

In orbit
Joined
Jul 28, 2011
Messages
291
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx
You need a multiple choice poll.
sx/ so

Your Scores
8 Words of Affirmation
8 Quality Time
1 Receiving Gifts
5 Acts of Service
8 Physical Touch
 

cascadeco

New member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
9,083
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
sp-dom

1.Quality Time
Physical Touch
Words of Affirmation

(physical and words are probably a close tie, but since over the years I've found words can be cheap and lack of words doesn't imply lack of feeling, I'm not sure where I stand on it anymore)
 

Randomnity

insert random title here
Joined
May 8, 2007
Messages
9,485
MBTI Type
ISTP
Enneagram
6w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
sp-dom, probably sp/sx.

Physical touch is probably a few points over quality time, but both are absolutely essential. Acts of service is probably next, then the rest.
 
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