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[sx] What is it really like to be sexual last?

mujigay

Intergalactic Badass
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Huh. Well all of this is pretty interesting, and actually gives me some insight into the character of a few people I know.

For what it's worth, I was kinda doubting that I was an sx first. But reading all of these responses makes me wonder now how I could be anything but.
 

Lady_X

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It's like having a low libido and read at bed next to Pamela Anderson, drinking tea. You look like you are gay while you are not.

omg thats such bullshit! haha!
 

Thunderbringer

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As a sp/so, I like to be around people but I don't necessarily like interacting with them. Going to movies and concerts or taking a ride in a bus are all very enjoyable things for me because I get to be around others and hear their conversations and see how they act, but I get to be by myself and not have to talk to them or do anything for them.
 

Lady_X

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No, it's true. Prove me wrong.

my bf is sx last and so was my ex husband and i am telling you there is no truth to that at all....there is nothing wrong with their libido.
 

Speed Gavroche

Whisky Old & Women Young
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my bf is sx last and so was my ex husband and i am telling you there is no truth to that at all....there is nothing wrong with their libido.


I told that they had a low libido, not that there was something wring in their libido.
 

Lady_X

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they do not have low libidos tho at all!! haha!!
 

Speed Gavroche

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they do not have low libidos tho at all!! haha!!

Men are differents because men are sexual pigs by nature. The masculine Sx-last, like John Wayne or JFK have an high libido. That doesn't mean that the most part of Sx-last are frigids. Or sometimes they like sex but they are so non- sexual in their look that imagine them having sex seems odd or like a comic line. But I know many females Sx-last, and one sure thing is that sex is not their stuff. If their man is not good at bed, they don't give a fuck. Sometimes they awake when they are in midlife crisis and wonder if they are not missing something, but it's seldom more.
 

Lady_X

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so you were talking about women there with your pamela anderson thing? haha no you weren't! and they don't look non sexual! they just don't put out sonar style sexy vibes out all over the place unknowingly haha
 

cascadeco

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As a sp/so, I like to be around people but I don't necessarily like interacting with them. Going to movies and concerts or taking a ride in a bus are all very enjoyable things for me because I get to be around others and hear their conversations and see how they act, but I get to be by myself and not have to talk to them or do anything for them.

You know, this sums up a lot of it for me, I think!!!

But this is one of the main areas of stress/anxiety / aspect of myself that I label as 'defective', tbh, so while what you describe is my ideal, I also judge myself for it and feel I am being judged for it.

Don't get me wrong, if the choice is between sitting in a knitting circle with a group of acquaintances for a gab session (eek...a scenario I usually find very unpleasant), vs. getting together 1:1 with a close friend to have what I consider a much more interesting convo, I will always go for the latter. But, I am not a self-discloser, nor do I really have a need to talk about myself, usually. I like talking topics, themes, observations, concepts...not so much intrapersonal things going on in my life. But I become anxious if I believe the other person wants me to talk more about myself. So I think this is why my 'ideal' is doing something activity-based with a friend.. something that isn't wholly focused on having a conversation. Or, with a group of friends, attending a dinner party or playing board games or such... so convo happens, but intense, intimate convo isn't the focus of the 'event'. So to speak.
 

Mycroft

The elder Holmes
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I dislike when people fail to restrain their emotions in public or generally cannot/will not attempt adapt/edit extreme behaviour to suit the situation.

I wanted to add how much I agree with this statement. I try to be understanding that others have different mindsets, but I can't help but experience it as selfishness when people feel everyone else around them should accept their confrontational behavior and/or brooding.
 

Hazashin

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I wanted to add how much I agree with this statement. I try to be understanding that others have different mindsets, but I can't help but experience it as selfishness when people feel everyone else around them should accept their confrontational behavior and/or brooding.

Spoken like a true Sx-last.
 

Speed Gavroche

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so you were talking about women there with your pamela anderson thing? haha no you weren't! and they don't look non sexual! they just don't put out sonar style sexy vibes out all over the place unknowingly haha

Hum, ok. You're right.

Though, I still have this image of an Sx-last who read at bed just next to a sex bomb. I'm pretty sure they are likely to do this.

And for Sx-last women, when they see that their man is not good at bed, their reaction is really that they don't give a fuck. There's often clears differences of libido betweem Sx-last women and Sx-second men, see Katty Perry and Russel Brand.
 
S

SingSmileShine

Guest
I'm an sx last ( sp > so > sx to be exact) and I honestly don't have a problem with intimacy. But I value my own goals and wants and my social life above that. Plus, I am a bit Church-girl-who-wants-to-wait-until-marriage type, no foul dancing at parties, etc. I just pride myself too much to do that. (Not to say I don't enjoy a good boyfriend or that I don't go crazy on the dance floor with friends!) So I guess people may see you as kind of unattainable if you're sx last. Which is kind of cool. (;
 

skylights

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I wanted to add how much I agree with this statement. I try to be understanding that others have different mindsets, but I can't help but experience it as selfishness when people feel everyone else around them should accept their confrontational behavior and/or brooding.

That's really interesting. That pretty much solidifies my typing of a good friend of mine as sp/so - which I sort of figured. She cannot stand when others display emotion in public.
 

Hazashin

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She cannot stand when others display emotion in public.

I hate that so much... T__T

EDIT: Let me clarify that: I meant I hate this type of attitude.
 

entropie

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Always being last in sex means the woman will never leave you ;)
 

Haven

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That's really interesting. That pretty much solidifies my typing of a good friend of mine as sp/so - which I sort of figured. She cannot stand when others display emotion in public.

I think that's more of an sp first thing, though I don't want to generalize. It's not an so or sx first thing.
 

Mycroft

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I think that's more of an sp first thing, though I don't want to generalize. It's not an so or sx first thing.

Yeah, I'm not really against people displaying any sort of emotion in public. I just think that people should, you know, take into consideration how the way they act is going to be interpreted by or how it will affect others.
 

SD45T-2

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That's really interesting. That pretty much solidifies my typing of a good friend of mine as sp/so - which I sort of figured. She cannot stand when others display emotion in public.
Why not so/sp?
 
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