• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts Stackings: telling so/sx from sp/so

Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
1,858
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
54
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
so/sx and sp/so stackings are, far and away, the most difficult for me to differentiate, particularly when I've not engaged or plan on engaging with the subjects in any way, shape, or form.

What've you noticed?
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
I dunno, I'm an so/sx.

The so/sx types feel more open and easy to me, but maybe that's just because I feel like I relate to them better.
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
I think you have a point fidelia. I am so stacking last, but I still think of so first people as being the easy people to get along with, they kind of naturally maintain a sense of community with others.

People who are sp first value self-preservation first, so they're often concerned with safety, physical health, and can seem withdrawn or less social.
 
Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
1,858
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
54
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
I'm talking about observing, say, a huge overflow of people, like that one festival at the Santa Monica pier. You know, thousands, with seconds to discern one way or another. Picking up on sputtered fragments of speech, patterns and directions of subgroup flow, isolated pockets. Taking so much in scrambles the circuits.

Clearly this is an instinctual-order-related issue, so I wonder if

fidella, can you think of an example when you had an "either/or" to make? People with so and sx in their top two seem particularly omnivorous in their people consumption, which is why I'm not exactly sure how to ask you. Maybe there's a sp/something something/sp combo that emulates the energy of an so/sx or sx/so (from the above-described distance)? Rate ease with which you sniff out sp. And, because of time, whatever unusual circumstances, you couldn't really decide, or you made a decision only to later doubt it? Within your e-type? And beyond? Observations? Other thoughts?

Marm, can you think of an example when you had either an sx/so or sp/sx? Same questions as above that apply.

Or has it been pretty cut and dry?

I'm thinking it's diagram time.
 

the state i am in

Active member
Joined
Feb 12, 2009
Messages
2,475
MBTI Type
infj
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
so/sx is the lightest, most anxious, most self-deprecating, and best at immediately giving everyone around the feeling of belonging to the group and being personally recognized at the same time. i really like so/sx types. i think a lot of so/sp types mistype as so/sx. so/sx types have the most natural charm, i think, whereas sx/so types have the most powerful, i'm gonna go get what i want charisma. so/sx types can seem flighty or spread out too thin, and i think they at times don't really know how to take care of their needs that don't at all fit in with the group. they're much more likely to try to work on the group then to work outside of it, because their skills are better suited towards that kind of changing the whole tone/tenor of the group attitude majority vote. so/sp types by contrast are a bit sterner, more deliberate, and more focused on personal accountability, personal distance/being given appropriate space, privacy, and freedom from having too much demanded of them by others.

sp/so is a bit different, it's more insulated but very warm, provides a softening quality to the whole ego complex, looking for a select few allies, a sense of belonging to a group but mostly relying on the freedom to be personally responsible for whatever happens, to not have to rely on others, to be free/not have to deal with them all the time and to instead be more self-reliant. kind of as a mode of protection. the sp/so types i know enjoy the presence of others, but they don't want direct engagement a lot of the time, they just want to be there together.
 

Fidelia

Iron Maiden
Staff member
Joined
May 31, 2009
Messages
14,497
MBTI Type
INFJ
Yeah Candyland - State's assessment sounds right but I don't have a lot of ideas about quick assessment. State is right that we have a tendancy to spread ourselves out too thin and to sometimes ignore our own needs. I find myself compelled to reach out to people, but then at some point kind of go into a slump where I don't reply to all the contacts I've started because I feel too overwhelmed. This tends to make me feel guilty, but I've learned that it goes in cycles, so when I come back, I've got more emotional energy to spread around. I don't know if this is MBTI, enneagram or stacking, but I do find that I have a compulsion when I meet new people to seek out their company until I kind of have them figured out. I don't mind recategorizing them if new info comes to light, but I like to know what I am working with and what to expect from them and where they fit into the grand scheme of things.
 

Red Herring

Superwoman
Joined
Jun 9, 2010
Messages
7,488
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
sp/so is a bit different, it's more insulated but very warm, provides a softening quality to the whole ego complex, looking for a select few allies, a sense of belonging to a group but mostly relying on the freedom to be personally responsible for whatever happens, to not have to rely on others, to be free/not have to deal with them all the time and to instead be more self-reliant. kind of as a mode of protection. the sp/so types i know enjoy the presence of others, but they don't want direct engagement a lot of the time, they just want to be there together.

Sounds about right. It's a constant balance between withdrawel, the need for a lot of time alone in your head and an often strong sense of detachment on the one hand and a usually warm and affectionate communication style (well, trying to) and a desire to be as agreeable as you can when you actually do interact with people on the other hand. Limited urge for interaction, but a desire for friendly and conflict free interaction when it happens. At least that's the way I perceive it.
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
Marm, can you think of an example when you had either an sx/so or sp/sx? Same questions as above that apply.

Or has it been pretty cut and dry?

I'm thinking it's diagram time.

What really helped me is when Brainheart posted links to Intimate Four, Self-Preservation Four, and Social Four with full-descriptions. If you're a 5, you can look at these descriptions there and they might help you decide.

http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype Five Intimate.htm

http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype Five Self Preservation.htm

http://www.enneagramcentral.com/Enneagram/Subtypes/Subtype Five Social.htm

I thought at one point I could be sp/sx, because my sp and sx are pretty close...but I do think I have the more "intense" vibe of an sx more so than I am guarded, though I am pretty focused on self-care (i.e. if I don't take care of me, I have nothing to give anyone else.) But the truth is that I've done weird things like not even noticed I was sitting in a physically uncomfortable position while have a conversation with someone I connected with on a deep, emotional level. That was the deal breaker for me.
 

Retmeishka

New member
Joined
Jan 13, 2011
Messages
239
MBTI Type
ISTP
I think that if someone uses the word "You" frequently, they have a strong sexual instinct. I think that I am a sp/so, so sx is my weakest instinct. It's uncomfortable for me to use the word "you" while talking directly to someone. I feel like I am being too personal, I'm flirting or sexually harassing them. I avoid using "you" and I talk about neutral subjects instead. So you can have a clue to the strength of their sexual instinct if they use the word "you" a lot while you overhear their conversations. A sp/so might not use that word as much.

Also I am unable to imitate other people's tone of voice and style of speaking. I would make a bad actress. A so/sx can imitate others.

I know someone who I think might be a so/sx. She uses "you" a lot when she talks, and she also gossips about people to other people - constantly. She can imitate someone's voice perfectly - it sounds exactly like whoever she's imitating, and it's hilarious. I recall reading somewhere that people with a strong sexual instinct are good at imitation - they "merge" with the person they're imitating, become that person for a moment, feel what they're feeling, and that's why the imitation is so good. I call her a so/sx because she will turn her attention to anybody who speaks to her, no matter how much is going on, she'll drop what she's doing and listen to you and focus on you. So her "merging" isn't just for one unique person, it's for anybody.

So a clue to guessing the so/sx might be: Are they talking ABOUT somebody? Gossiping? Talking about a person? Talking about one particular person, and maybe comparing them to another person? Talking about one person after another. But not talking about a whole group at once.

I'm not sure what to say about glimpsing people walking by in a crowd, though. I've tried to guess at crowds and I don't think I'm very good at it. I'm not even sure of my own type. There might not be enough information if they're walking by really fast.
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
I don't claim to be able to type people's enneagram, let alone instincts, without interacting with them. But...

sp/so Because of their sp they direct energy internally. They may appear more contained.
so/sx Intensity is more obvious, and energy is directed outwardly. They would appear more open.

sp/so Depending on their E-type they tend to direct their energy towards that which will improve things for them; their work, their family, possessions, health, themselves.
so/sx Are all about people and direct their energy towards people and society, material things are not of much importance.

sp/so Self reliance is generally strong.
so/sx They are less independent than the sp/so's, strength for them comes from relationships

sp/so Also depending on E-type, sp/so's would often be described as warm and friendly.
so/sx Humour and charm is often a strength for so/sx's.

sp/so While they may desire close relationships they will seldom actively or easily pursue it.
so/sx Not only do they enjoy being amongst others but they want to form close connections with them.

sp/so Again depending on Etype they will often put their needs first.
so/sx As people are what matters, they tend to want to be liked by everyone. Practical matters are less important than relationships.

sp/so In a crowd sp/so's would be more inclined to hold back if something personal was being discussed. They may be less comfortable with physical contact. Basically you're looking at what they're not, that's sx.
so/sx In a crowd would tend to be engaged with other people, personal topics and personal conversations would likely not cause discomfort, quite the opposite.

Not all of the above points would be able to be noticed without direct interaction with a person but that's my take.
 
B

brainheart

Guest
I don't claim to be able to type people's enneagram, let alone instincts, without interacting with them. But...

sp/so Because of their sp they direct energy internally. They may appear more contained.
so/sx Intensity is more obvious, and energy is directed outwardly. They would appear more open.

sp/so Depending on their E-type they tend to direct their energy towards that which will improve things for them; their work, their family, possessions, health, themselves.
so/sx Are all about people and direct their energy towards people and society, material things are not of much importance.

sp/so Self reliance is generally strong.
so/sx They are less independent than the sp/so's, strength for them comes from relationships

sp/so Also depending on E-type, sp/so's would often be described as warm and friendly.
so/sx Humour and charm is often a strength for so/sx's.

sp/so While they may desire close relationships they will seldom actively or easily pursue it.
so/sx Not only do they enjoy being amongst others but they want to form close connections with them.

sp/so Again depending on Etype they will often put their needs first.
so/sx As people are what matters, they tend to want to be liked by everyone. Practical matters are less important than relationships.

sp/so In a crowd sp/so's would be more inclined to hold back if something personal was being discussed. They may be less comfortable with physical contact. Basically you're looking at what they're not, that's sx.
so/sx In a crowd would tend to be engaged with other people, personal topics and personal conversations would likely not cause discomfort, quite the opposite.

Not all of the above points would be able to be noticed without direct interaction with a person but that's rmy take.

This is incredibly helpful. Thank you.
 

onemoretime

Dreaming the life
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
4,455
MBTI Type
3h50
Late to the fun, but here's my idea -

Your secondary instinct is the means you use to prefer to use to fulfill the needs of the primary. So, if you're sp/so, you are a "joiner," because staying in groups makes you feel comfortable. If you're so/sx, you get close with people, so you can always have a group to belong to.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
ahhhh!!! the variant stackings are drivin me mad! you ever just take in too much information for anything to make any sense!?
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
you ever just take in too much information for anything to make any sense!?

Sure, the more information you take in the more the picture shifts and new alternatives are possible, gotsta love that Ne.

Which instinct doesn't make sense to you? Don't over think just say the one that goes through your mind first as hardest to get.

And keep in mind if you struggle to relate, it may not be a tool that will help you in any practical way.
 
Top