Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts Instincts and Disintegration

[Saturnal Snowqueen]

Thought this was my own theory, but I've seen it brought up in other places. Do any of you guys feel like your instincts "disintegrate"? I've noticed that when I'm sad, I'm just more sx then I usually am. I start craving more closeness with people, and I worry about my life being passionless so I try to create passion in new ways(my art becomes extra fueled by emotion, for example) Then, when I'm happier, I feel more So even more than usual. So is always a desire of mine, but I feel like I exercise it more naturally when I'm happy. I'm more outgoing and am more driven to have an impact on the world, desiring a bit of fame and even making connections of my own(between others). Then SP as the dominant instinct is more constant, not fluctuating as much besides my anxiety seeming to make it stronger. So yeah, maybe it's all a byproduct of regular disintegration/integration, but has anyone else noticed this?

 

[RadicalDoubt]

I've not noticed it in a particular inta/disintigration sort of way, but I do think health of the instincts is likely to follow health levels. I notice that in poor levels of health, my soc dies (or maybe rather becomes "anti-social soc where I'm attentive to my disconnection and almost willfully wallow in it like being an outcast is "more comfortable" since I can't make the connections I desire) and I can become "pseudo sx" in a pretty unhealthy way in the sense that I can loose my sense of boundaries and also have similar issues with hyperfocusing on trying to be passionate or follow blindly my own whims to find some sort of stimulation to reconcile my lack of passion (which I think is pretty consistent with blindspot overfocus in both our examples).

In good health, I also see a bit more soc from myself in the sense that I'm not unconsciously keeping myself from connecting with others and in other ways as well. I've actually seen this in a lot of people with their secondary instinct having a significant boost when moving into positive health levels.

It'd be interesting to see what others say though. The instincts by technicality do have an "ordering" if you consider syn/contraflow theory and what you do describe there could potentially be moving in the contra direction when unhealthy and syn direction when in good health, but I think fluctuating instinct strengths and blind spot overfocus may make more sense.

 

[Morpeko]

Thinking about it, I would say that my instinctual blindspot becomes "activated" when I'm not feeling mentally well.

On a regular basis, I definitely don't have any social positive social instinct tendencies. However, I've noticed that under stress, I become very preoccupied about my standing among other people, and how other people perceive me. I'm evidently still neurotic right now, but I've experienced some improvement over my kid/teen self, who had a lot more social anxiety and definitely more unhealthy behaviors. When I first discovered enneagram as a teenager, I actually typed as sp/so (and even stupidly so/sp for some time) because of my worries about not fitting in and all that bullshit. Also, I hadn't discovered any of my passions yet so I thought I'd had to live life without any "sx" connections to anything. I also thought that "sx" would have to be tied to a person, and I did not know any people with whom I would have wanted to sx-connect.

Nowadays I'm rarely focused on social matters, I have no interest in social groups and even more so how I make an impact on others. I think that the most fulfilling way to live my miserable life is to escape into my passions, and the best way for me to be able to pursue said passions is through keeping myself physically safe by self-preservation. Yes, I still think I experience "disintegration into soc" sometimes but definitely not as strongly as before, and that tends to only happen when I'm more unhealthy.

I think I rambled on too much but there's my 2 cents. Interesting question.