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Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts What do you like and dislike about your instinctual stacking?

Luminous

༻✧✧༺
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
10,235
MBTI Type
Iᑎᖴᑭ
Enneagram
952
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Is there anything that stands out to you? Anything that helps you? Or holds you back?
 

Yuurei

Noncompliant
Joined
Sep 29, 2016
Messages
4,509
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w7
I should learn more about stacking. it sounds interesting and maybe somewhat helpful. Best resources?
 

Peter Deadpan

phallus impudicus
Joined
Dec 14, 2016
Messages
8,883
I don't like that a lack of Sx seems to make me very unsettled, frustrated, or even depressed, and yet I am probably Sp/Sx. I don't like that sometimes I am ashamed of my need to create Sx energy via exhibitionism. I don't mind being a cold Sp ice queen, but I do mind when people misinterpret my discomfort in groups or around new people as being stuck up. Also, I can certainly actually be stuck up at times, in my own way, and I also don't necessarily like that.
 

Methylene

Now with more salt.
Joined
Oct 10, 2016
Messages
2,560
MBTI Type
LVEF
Enneagram
639
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
List of dislikes: The lack of intensity and passion in everything I do, every relationship I try to create, even if not in a romantic sense. They're often cold and shallow. I desperately seek connection with groups as a whole, but not intensity with the single individuals.
Sometimes I think I'm pretty boring as a person, so I try to do what I can not to be it.
I fall in the "us vs them" mentality, at times. I can become a crusader over anything.
 

Luminous

༻✧✧༺
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
10,235
MBTI Type
Iᑎᖴᑭ
Enneagram
952
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp

Agent Washington

Softserve Ice Cream
Joined
Jan 24, 2017
Messages
2,053
Being So blind really, really bites me in the behind sometimes... It's one of those things I would love to ignore, since I don't value it. It always comes back in the form of rumours, vengeance, mockery... etc.
 

Yuurei

Noncompliant
Joined
Sep 29, 2016
Messages
4,509
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w7

That is a lot of information. Thanks.

I know someone I trusted here typed me as Sp/Sx and I read up on a little at the time.
SP itself doesn’t like me at all, but just as an 8 with a 6 in the tri-type transforms it somewhat the sp with sx combination seems very applicable

What do I dislike about it? The eternal struggle between human connection and independence is very real. (But isn't that just the human condition? Is this really different from anyone else?)
And be easily summed up by such phrases as
“ I am an island.”
“ I am the master of my own universe”
“ If I want something done I have to do it myself!”
and “ Why am I so alone?”

What do I like about it? Sheer resilience "So I’m alone. Bring on the world. I'll be the only one standing in the end."

Like I said, my knowledge on this subject is limited but there is nothing I know more than myself.
 

rav3n

.
Joined
Aug 6, 2010
Messages
11,655
No likes or dislikes, only acceptance and subsequent accommodations.
 

Coriolis

Si vis pacem, para bellum
Staff member
Joined
Apr 18, 2010
Messages
27,230
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
What do I dislike about it? The eternal struggle between human connection and independence is very real. (But isn't that just the human condition? Is this really different from anyone else?)
And be easily summed up by such phrases as
“ I am an island.”
“ I am the master of my own universe”
“ If I want something done I have to do it myself!”
and “ Why am I so alone?”
I agree with the above, except I have long known the answer to the highlighted, and am fine with that bargain. I used to struggle with that balance more when I was younger, but learned it isn't worth it. Being included for the sake of it, or with other people for the sake of it, is empty and worse than being alone. To the extent that I am alone, it is because being with others has been stressful, unpleasant, counterproductive, or other negative things.
 

Yuurei

Noncompliant
Joined
Sep 29, 2016
Messages
4,509
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w7
I agree with the above, except I have long known the answer to the highlighted, and am fine with that bargain. I used to struggle with that balance more when I was younger, but learned it isn't worth it. Being included for the sake of it, or with other people for the sake of it, is empty and worse than being alone. To the extent that I am alone, it is because being with others has been stressful, unpleasant, counterproductive, or other negative things.

I actually I feel the very same. I would never pretend to be someone I'm not, or to care about things that I don't just to get along. The very act of status seeking disgusts me ( part of why I hate memes so much) I especially agree with your assessment of being with others.

Still, feeling completely isolated and misunderstood is a pretty shitty place to be...though not so much that I would ever give up who I am to get out.
 

Maou

Mythos
Joined
Jun 20, 2018
Messages
6,117
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I am still considering myself omnivarient for now, slightly sp dom. Why? Because I can.

I like and hate everything about everything at the same time.
 

rav3n

.
Joined
Aug 6, 2010
Messages
11,655
What have you had to accept or accommodate?
To feel fulfilled, I need deep intimacy in relationships so I've learned to partner only with men who also need the same. It's a neutral observation.
 

Luminous

༻✧✧༺
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
10,235
MBTI Type
Iᑎᖴᑭ
Enneagram
952
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
That is a lot of information. Thanks.

I know someone I trusted here typed me as Sp/Sx and I read up on a little at the time.
SP itself doesn’t like me at all, but just as an 8 with a 6 in the tri-type transforms it somewhat the sp with sx combination seems very applicable

What do I dislike about it? The eternal struggle between human connection and independence is very real. (But isn't that just the human condition? Is this really different from anyone else?)
And be easily summed up by such phrases as
“ I am an island.”
“ I am the master of my own universe”
“ If I want something done I have to do it myself!”
and “ Why am I so alone?”

What do I like about it? Sheer resilience "So I’m alone. Bring on the world. I'll be the only one standing in the end."

Like I said, my knowledge on this subject is limited but there is nothing I know more than myself.

I agree with the above, except I have long known the answer to the highlighted, and am fine with that bargain. I used to struggle with that balance more when I was younger, but learned it isn't worth it. Being included for the sake of it, or with other people for the sake of it, is empty and worse than being alone. To the extent that I am alone, it is because being with others has been stressful, unpleasant, counterproductive, or other negative things.

I actually I feel the very same. I would never pretend to be someone I'm not, or to care about things that I don't just to get along. The very act of status seeking disgusts me ( part of why I hate memes so much) I especially agree with your assessment of being with others.

Still, feeling completely isolated and misunderstood is a pretty shitty place to be...though not so much that I would ever give up who I am to get out.

Thanks to both of you for your commentary on sp/sx, and, in particular, being so last.

I can very much relate to the sx/sp hungry ghost, a constant desire for more. Maybe not more in the moment, but more when I'm not having it in the moment, which can be exhausting, frustrating, and sometimes crushing. The sx/sp/so has sp between sx and so, a barrier between interacting with the world enough (so) to get the sx I want.

When I do find a brilliant sx connection, it's incredibly wonderful.
 

cascadeco

New member
Joined
Oct 7, 2007
Messages
9,083
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
9w1
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
It seems there is a continuous flux with me between desiring and needing my own space, self sufficiency, strong drive for that, being fine with it, and then needing or wanting something that gives life more excitement and meaning, or being incredibly lonely and wishing for connection and even just comfort and feeling loved and accepted by someone else. Being truly loved, I guess. Also with sp first (probably a real and crucial difference between it and sx first), I find I can go back and forth between desiring intimacy and, well, being fine without it. But the desire always returns. It's like ping pong. Lacking the social drive, I end up doing nothing about any of this, most of the time. Or, nothing happens. So for me, for anything to actually 'happen' sx wise (in terms of potentially meeting new people), I'd have to resort to something more related to the social instinct, whether trying to be more social, maybe trying to find an activity I might like where I could meet people, etc. I have ended up resorting to this in the past but I haven't done it for a while. It'll have to he done again at some point here. :laugh: I think though that this is where being sp first can really deplete the 'drive' to do it (because I AM fine, well, half of the time ;)), vs an sx first might be more readily apt to do it just because sx is that much more imperative.
 

Shadow Play

New member
Joined
Oct 28, 2018
Messages
236
A forum member here once described me as "sx blind af" because I had shown no interest in developing connections. Although I'm not as distant in real life as I am online, I'm still fairly aloof in my personal affairs. I need space to center myself and to detach from the world.

I have little interest in dating or romance, mostly because I honestly feel I'm not missing out. It's better to be single than to be in a bad relationship. The very idea of needing someone else to be 'complete' doesn't register at all. If you don't feel content with who you are while single, why would you once circumstances change? Those self-esteem issues leave one vulnerable to manipulation and abuse.

One potential issue is leaving a partner feeling cold. My gut response is that I'm not accountable for how others should feel about themselves. Sure, I'd offer comfort and support if they're going through a hard time, but I can't accept their personal experience as my own. Doing so would place too many expectations on the relationship.

Also, I tend to hold back from revealing myself. The whole time, my inner critic kept me from making this post any more personal than it already is, and I still feel as though I've revealed too much.
 

Luminous

༻✧✧༺
Joined
Oct 25, 2017
Messages
10,235
MBTI Type
Iᑎᖴᑭ
Enneagram
952
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
[MENTION=38365]Shadow Play[/MENTION], aw, I really appreciate you sharing what you did, with how uncomfortable I know it can be to share things like that. (Sharing vulnerable things in public is very uncomfortable for me, too.)

For what it's worth, what you describe might just be you being very much 5sp. Sx can be toward things: being hooked by something, 'turned on' energetically. It's possible to be asexual and have sx, for instance. Especially with 5, it's not going to be dropping walls and being psychologically nude with just anyone.
 
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