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Cultivating optimism and a sense of adventure

Lark

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How would you go about doing this and when would you be able to tell when its done? Is the music you listen to or other media you consume a factor?
 

Dreamer

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I suppose a good deal may be tied to having a general perspective or view that whatever shit gets tossed your way won't kill you, unless it actually does, but that's past the point of being reckless rather than what I'd call adventurous. And you might obtain this point of view (maybe) with a good dose of self reflection every so often, and contemplate the outcome of the adventure you've just experienced, how did you learn from it, how can you grow? The more I know myself and the more I find my true capabilities, the more confidence and more daring I become to pushing my boundaries further. Not quite so literally of course, I won't ever become some daredevil, but in many ways, I'm constantly pushing what I initially thought was a boundary or limit of mine, only to find where I can surpass it and in some areas where I can't. I'd also conclude that having a decent bit of awareness of what you ARE actually limited by, and that's what would keep you within the realm of adventure rather than recklessness.
 

The Cat

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How would you go about doing this and when would you be able to tell when its done? Is the music you listen to or other media you consume a factor?

Well is this thread because you've started feeling the itch to cultivate more optimism, and do you feel like you need an adventure? Because if so, then, you're off to a good start. Music can put you into moods for sure, but its also an attitude, or choice if you like, something inside of you that rattles the bars of your soul and demands that you go do something...at least it is for me. As to how to tell when you're done? I honestly don't know if anyone who sets down that path is ever done until they shuffle off the mortal coil, and even then, to live and die is a grand adventure in and of itself...
 

Lark

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Well is this thread because you've started feeling the itch to cultivate more optimism, and do you feel like you need an adventure? Because if so, then, you're off to a good start. Music can put you into moods for sure, but its also an attitude, or choice if you like, something inside of you that rattles the bars of your soul and demands that you go do something...at least it is for me. As to how to tell when you're done? I honestly don't know if anyone who sets down that path is ever done until they shuffle off the mortal coil, and even then, to live and die is a grand adventure in and of itself...

Its something I've seen people list as a goal or new year resolution, as in "I will cultivate a sense of optimism and adventure", but I'm not sure what it means or how to quantify it as achieved or accomplished, I'm just musing about it, I think it is a worthwhile goal probably.

Although if you have that as a goal does it mean that you are not optimistic and are not adventurous?
 

Lark

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I suppose a good deal may be tied to having a general perspective or view that whatever shit gets tossed your way won't kill you, unless it actually does, but that's past the point of being reckless rather than what I'd call adventurous. And you might obtain this point of view (maybe) with a good dose of self reflection every so often, and contemplate the outcome of the adventure you've just experienced, how did you learn from it, how can you grow? The more I know myself and the more I find my true capabilities, the more confidence and more daring I become to pushing my boundaries further. Not quite so literally of course, I won't ever become some daredevil, but in many ways, I'm constantly pushing what I initially thought was a boundary or limit of mine, only to find where I can surpass it and in some areas where I can't. I'd also conclude that having a decent bit of awareness of what you ARE actually limited by, and that's what would keep you within the realm of adventure rather than recklessness.

I think it is interesting what you say about differentiating between adventure and recklessness.

Also, a lot what I see conceptualised as the standard answer to being adventurous or what is adventurous does not appeal to me, this is something I've thought about watching People Are Awesome videos or (the very few times) Fail Army videos, some of the stunts, paragliding, climbing high summits, swings, bungee jumps, those tilting platforms in skyscrapers, the glass floors to walk over and some of them with that shatter glass effect on them, those things dont actually seem that adventurous, especially since they are becoming kind of like a package holiday deal thing, or maybe I'm being all hipster about it.

There's also the thing about so called "comfort zones" which I think is kind of like the whole defining the terms thing you mention between adventure and recklessness, people talk about getting out of their comfort zone or, more often, how others should, I've noticed its a favourite of management literature and often I think its code for I'm pretty comfortable myself but I dont think you should be, I've also heard some people who I'm pretty sure are sketchy or sadistic deep down coin phrases like that and the unwary have just treated it as so much managerial or positive thinking lexicon stuff were otherwise they'd be alerted to something that's not quite right about that person or what they've said.
 

The Cat

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Its something I've seen people list as a goal or new year resolution, as in "I will cultivate a sense of optimism and adventure", but I'm not sure what it means or how to quantify it as achieved or accomplished, I'm just musing about it, I think it is a worthwhile goal probably.

Although if you have that as a goal does it mean that you are not optimistic and are not adventurous?

Perhaps they don't feel optimistic and adventurous enough? Ime people make goals for all kinds of reasons, most of them only make sense to them I reckon...
 

Lark

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Perhaps they don't feel optimistic and adventurous enough? Ime people make goals for all kinds of reasons, most of them only make sense to them I reckon...

True, true.

On the old 43 Things website (there is one now but its not like the original site or so I think) it was one of the most popular goals but it probably meant different things to the people who picked it as a goal.
 

Z Buck McFate

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Martin Seligman (the father of the positive psychology movement) has written some fantastic direction about cultivating optimism, based on his studies. I'm personally a hard sell on things supposedly designed to boost positivity, I often find things that others praise as useful to be empty platitudes for me - but I really like Seligman's work. I'll have to wait until I'm actually at my computer to give links - but one that comes to mind right now is making the habit to consider what we have to be grateful for every single day. This makes gratitude spread into our unconscious auto-pilot thinking.

And when I'm having trouble authentically finding something to be grateful for, I find this instruction incredibly helpful: imagine if we only woke up every morning with that which we thanked God for on the previous day. I'm Agnostic, but it's still an incredibly useful way to find what I'm grateful for.
 

Lark

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Martin Seligman (the father of the positive psychology movement) has written some fantastic direction about this, based on his studies. I'm personally a hard sell on things supposedly designed to boost positivity, I often find things that others praise as useful to be empty platitudes for me - but I really like Seligman's work. I'll have to wait until I'm actually at my computer to give links - but one that comes to mind right now is making the habit to consider what we have to be grateful for every single day. This makes gratitude spread into our unconscious auto-pilot thinking.

And when I'm having trouble authentically finding something to be grateful for, I find this instruction incredibly helpful: imagine if we only woke up every morning with that which we thanked God for on the previous day. I'm Agnostic, but it's still an incredibly useful way to find what I'm grateful for.

I liked Seligman's Learned Helplessness and the other book on the limits of psychotherapy, in which he suggests that if people had more helpful friends it would help a lot, but I didnt like his book called authentic happiness, I really thought by that point some of his material had jumped the horse or he'd moved to commercialising his model or thinking.

The attitude of gratitude really is a thing though, I totally agree with that and practice something like it most of the time, I even like that other guy, is it Napoleon Hill or another author who writes about visualisation? Became the basis for The Secret and all that, I dont believe those extrapolations, not sure I believe their theory at all but I do believe in that kind of positive thinking.

William James is an author I'm interested in at the moment, I'm reading a book about "positive action" called "Rip It Up" which suggests that you should act in accordance with goals as much as think about them, like if you are afraid of public speaking and want to be a good public speaker you should do it as much as think and psyche yourself up about it. I cant remember the author of this book but its called "Rip It Up" anyway.
 

Z Buck McFate

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I haven't read Seligman's book on authentic happiness - but I thought Flourish had some great exercises in it. (And yeah, I thought his studies on helplessness were fascinating). I'll have to look up the others you mentioned.
 

Lark

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I haven't read Seligman's book on authentic happiness - but I thought Flourish had some great exercises in it. (And yeah, I thought his studies on helplessness were fascinating). I'll have to look up the others you mentioned.

Rip it up is by Richard Wiseman, its by my bed in a TBR pile but I've a lot to read before I get to it.

I'm not sure if I read Flourish, its maybe the one Seligman book I dont have, after reading Authentic Happiness I sort of got estranged from him as a writer.
 

Z Buck McFate

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I just did an Amazon search for that^ book, and one of the items listed among the search results was a remote control Mega Fart machine.

I just, I thought it was funny enough to share.
 

anticlimatic

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If you want to accomplish this, you're going to have to be more like me. Something to think about.
 

Julius_Van_Der_Beak

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I liked Seligman's Learned Helplessness and the other book on the limits of psychotherapy, in which he suggests that if people had more helpful friends it would help a lot, but I didnt like his book called authentic happiness, I really thought by that point some of his material had jumped the horse or he'd moved to commercialising his model or thinking.

The attitude of gratitude really is a thing though, I totally agree with that and practice something like it most of the time, I even like that other guy, is it Napoleon Hill or another author who writes about visualisation? Became the basis for The Secret and all that, I dont believe those extrapolations, not sure I believe their theory at all but I do believe in that kind of positive thinking.

Seligman has some great stuff to say about forgiveness and anger, also, in which he suggests that the folk psychology (derived from Freudian thinking) model that people need to "let out" their anger is faulty, and it only encourages more anger.

Though I suppose this may bother more political types who feel that anger is necessary to motivate people to solving society's problems. (I'm not really sure if they are wrong on that.)

Anyway, Seligman is a favorite of mine.
 

Lark

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Seligman has some great stuff to say about forgiveness and anger, also, in which he suggests that the folk psychology (derived from Freudian thinking) model that people need to "let out" their anger is faulty, and it only encourages more anger.

Though I suppose this may bother more political types who feel that anger is necessary to motivate people to solving society's problems. (I'm not really sure if they are wrong on that.)

Anyway, Seligman is a favorite of mine.

That version of anger is a "hydraulic" version of anger, its more associated with the guy who wrote Man Meets Dog, King Solomans Ring, Aggression in Man and Animals (I'm not sure if the final answer is correct but it is the idea in any case), he did lots of research into animals and humans and the relationships between the two or comparisons between the two. I cant remember his name right now though.

Erich Fromm did a really great critique of the thinking, describing someone working for an aggressive employer as a maid servant and that the "hydraulic theory" would suggest the employer "had to" give vent to them when in actuality the employer had unresolved internal conflicts or complexes which give rise to the anger the venting of which will not do anything about its origin but it could become a habit, especially if they have the power/freedom to do so by virtue of being an employer.
 
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