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  1. #11

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    Ignore it when it's inconvenient where convenience is subjectively defined by me and process it when it's convenient. Narrow it to increase intensity, when it's convenient and/or useful for me, directed at the individual. Redirect the energy towards something more productive. Disperse it through parsing.

    It's an emotion just like every other emotion so I accept it as such and process it accordingly.
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  2. #12
    Demon King Tenebris's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ixaerus View Post
    Question, by 'get angry' do you mean feel angry, or express anger?
    Because in the rest of your post you mention dealing with the existing feeling of anger, just that you do not show it.

    (Also, is verbally lashing out not a physical show of anger?)
    Both, any aspects of the emotion.
    Omnivariant

  3. #13
    Senior Member anticlimatic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by highlander View Post
    I have always thought of anger as my friend.
    Anger typically a product of stress, which is quite literally your mortal enemy:

    Ways to Shorten Your Life Span
    Stress and Heart Disease: Get Facts on the Warning Signs

    There are plenty of other motivating forces for action. I recommend joie de vivre, the pleasure of making order out of chaos, and curiosity (of your abilities, actions, and possible outcomes). Conflict is unavoidable, but getting angry about it and during it is a choice. I consider myself something of a self taught zen master, and believe people would do well by themselves in taking some of my advice on this subject. Here's a list of things you can do to improve your life by reducing your overall anger:

    1) If you have no control over it, don't get angry about it. This is another area where anger is a choice. If you're in traffic and not going as fast as you would like, just relax, brush it off, give the car in front of you some room and think about other things. If you're sitting at home getting all worked up about global warming or your country's foreign policy, chill out. Think about something else. If there's nothing you can do about something, it isn't worth letting that thing poison your life.

    2) If something surprising angers you that you do have some control over, act on it as soon as possible. Don't act impulsively, but put everything- including and ESPECIALLY speaking- on hold until you have thought it through to an action/solution that satisfies you. Then present it to the world, stat (if someone is hitting you or someone you care about, the amount of time it takes you to think to defend yourself/them physically should be less than three seconds).

    3) If something unsurprising threatens to anger you, nip it the bud immediately. If someone asks you to do something you don't want to do for them, say no- or at least not without whatever will make it worth it to you (sure, I'll help you move- for 30 bucks). Don't let yourself do things that you will be angry at yourself for doing. If you are addicted to those things, break that addiction first. Anyone can break an addiction, it's always possible. Stick up for yourself, but don't swing sticks at other people.
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  4. #14
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    I don't get angry a whole lot as I typically don't see things that happen as worth anger.

    But when I am angry, I find the best thing to do is distance myself from the situation and come back later.
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  5. #15
    Junior Member TetrisMatrix's Avatar
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    I get angry very fast and it goes away that way as well. I get angry when I anticipate something but reality verifies it differently. For instance, me and my friends were at the pub 2 weeks ago. Some drunk guys asked for joining. Of course I told them ok, you can have a sit. They were boring, but not harmful. Howeve, after a while, one of them became more and more drunk and he started to touch my friend (she is very very intrverted and I know that she would not do anything because she is so closed). I just said very vey not in my style that he should f ck off form her etc, I hate when that kind of things happens. He was like ''oh comon I just need a closure'', her eyes were " omg I am so not ok with it" and I just told him twice to get out of here or I will hurt him.

    I hate it when people abuse power that they have. The power of trust or kindness of other person. I hope you know what I mean.

    I prefer quick decisions to solve the problem or gym
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  6. #16
    Doubtful But Well Meaning RadicalDoubt's Avatar
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    It really depends on the context of the anger. In real anger situations, I'm prone to internalizing my anger to some degree because most of my anger is typically directed at myself and I value having control over myself. Brooding over my anger and analyzing things to death is one common reaction, another is trying to use that anger as a fuel for ambition and my goals. If that doesn't work to dissipate the anger itself, I can become somewhat outwardly aggressive and brash. But this is of course when I am actually angry, and that's relatively rare because my fuse is unnaturally long.

    Frankly, I have a stronger reaction and much lower tolerance for mild frustration than I do to real anger.

    Edit: It's worth noting that, while this is my personal perception of my anger, literally no one really notices it till I reach my breaking point and scream at people. So when I say outwardly aggressive it's probably closer to abruptly telling people to back off or that I'm struggling to handle them and being condescending then anything else. Believe it or not, directly telling people about your anger doesn't make it more obvious in my case.
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  7. #17
    幽霊||๏ ɴᴏ sᴜʙᴍᴇʀsɪᴏɴ Hexcoder's Avatar
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    I'm pretty much exactly as Eryn / Jack said. It's fuel / energy to me, I channel it. It becomes determination.
    JOHARI || NOHARI
    There is always something to judge for: humans are infinitely flawed, we can never be perfect. To me, diversity is the beauty in it all: without it there is no discovery, no curiosity, no exploration...yet, that inescapable difference is what they judge. Judge away, I say: it will never corrode my individuality.
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  8. #18
    Somber and irritated cascadeco's Avatar
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    I have become more prone to anger as I have gotten older. I think this is the result of my no longer immediately trying to repress it/rationalize it/reframe things, or immediately trying to see things from the other persons pov/blaming myself. When younger I hardly recognized anger/probably would have responded that I rarely experience it. (Which was true, due to reframing/repression, etc)

    I still find it difficult in most cases to actually 'do' anything about it (Example: I can't push back at customers; and believe me, the few times I do/have nothing good comes of it/ it's a lose lose situation for all involved); most of the time there's no effective outlet for it, and most of the time all I can really do is vent. As such, experiencing it ends up causing me stress vs it actually being an emotion that sparks anything positive. A lot of times I might be angry because there in fact is NOT anything that can be done. Sometimes it points to something that can be done / I should do, though, or it is a wakeup call.

    I think most of the time I experience the milder form of anger - irritation. I can get irritated fairly easily, but a lot of that could be due to my constantly being at the mercy of people every day on the job and so it can wear on me, thus my threshold of tolerance becomes compromised.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  9. #19
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    Anger is like the gasoline to my getting shit done mode. I work out more, complete unfinished things and tunnel vision in on my determination. Unless I'm hurt and beyond furious, and then I'm completely giving up on the source of the anger. Shut the door, and done.

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