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How rare is being a good conversationalist?

ThoughtBubbles

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How rare in your experience is being a solid, good conversationalist as a trait/skill in your experience?
 

hurl3y4456

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How rare in your experience is being a solid, good conversationalist as a trait/skill in your experience?

Well, it's becoming rarer since verbal communication is being condensed and slowly transitioning towards a non-verbal form (think social media platforms such as instagram, snapchat, exc). (*) Further, the increase in industrialization is condensing space, which implies that there will exist more events and people within a unit space. I believe the increase in environmental stimulus is causing our neurotransmitter receptors to readjust to a higher demand. Thus, we need to saturate ourselves in more activities/events to excite our neurotransmitters due to adaptation in respect to an increase in activity.

Suppose your life represents multiple line segments which comprise of individual events. An increase in stimulus implies that your life will comprise of smaller line segments relative to lesser developed area (due to more distractions/activity). We can define each one-one conversation as event x1,x2,....,xn. If each line segment is being compressed, then events x1-->xn become compressed (due to distractions such as phone calls, texts, noise, exc). This is one reason the rate misdiagnosed ADD is tending upward. Therefore, the ability to develop the skill as a conservationist would reduce due to time constraints....But, if we consider that more events will be observed in a unit time, there will be an increase in our repository in regards to potential topics. The internet provides a massive storage of information, so in theory, we have an increase in the potential to become a good conversationalist. Yet, by (*), our potential is greatly minimized because our mind will tend to wander and our patience for extended conversation is reducing.

Of course, I am generalizing here....Based on the trend, there is going to be a steady increase in internet/mobile communication since non-verbal reasoning/intellect is trending upward and verbal intellect is trending downward (due to technological advance). Of course, there will exist veracious readers who deviate from the trend (altering brain plasticity)....I have observed that bankers, accountants, and service providers/agents can become more introverted over time (less sociability) due to the environment....Constantly repeating the same dialogue or repetitive tasks day in day out causes the brain to slowly adapt to such conditions (including reduction in sociability). Thus, it will take some resistance to break the cycle if one is to be involved in such a cycle for an extended period.
 

Yuurei

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Awful. Almost everyone I know speaks in memes. It’s soul crushing and I’ve ended freindships over it.
 

I Tonya

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Its very rare. I've found some INFPs Ik have better conversational skills than a lot of extroverts.

I find it bothersome to be asked "wyd" all the time without them giving input of their life as well.
 

/DG/

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I find it bothersome to be asked "wyd" all the time without them giving input of their life as well.

Really? This is interesting. I've always been under the impression that people enjoy talking about themselves. So irl, I'm much more inclined to ask questions about people's lives than I am to randomly share details about mine. Typically, I don't have much to share anyway.
 

misfortuneteller

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I can be a good conversationalist if I am interested in the topic. I tend to light up and my enthusiasm tends to draw them in.
 

Coriolis

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How rare in your experience is being a solid, good conversationalist as a trait/skill in your experience?
Depends on what you mean. Plenty of folks can spout smalltalk with whomever they run into, but I don't consider that good conversation. Few people have the interest or perhaps the ability to engage in substantive discussion of interesting topics, and I'm not sure that has changed much. It is the alternatives which have changed.
 

Maou

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Awful. Almost everyone I know speaks in memes. It’s soul crushing and I’ve ended freindships over it.

Memes are the future!

I kid, I do think people use them too much and I love memes.
 

notmyapples

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Pretty rare but that's because there are so many variables, it's hard to pin down what makes a 'good' conversational. Selfishness, awkwardness, nervousness, insecurity, obliviousness, and a number of other things can cause someone to be a bad conversationalist and most people tick one or more boxes. Being a good conversationalist is rarely natural, it's a skill that most people you'd consider good at probably worked for. Many people don't work at this skill because it's not really regarded as one, charisma is seen as a mystic force that you have or you don't have when it can be as simple as direct eye contact, maintaining a steady voice and remaining actively engaged in conversations with people.
 

anticlimatic

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Well I suck at it, so I wouldn't know where to begin in judging others.

Stranger: "Howdy!"
Me: "Good thanks, how are you?"

My Brain is also fond of not being sure which word to use right up until the last second, when it combines both words into audio nonsense:

"Ugh, I know! Hasn't stopped raining for weeks, it's really starting to make me feel like SCHRAP."
 

Neal Caffreynated

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Great conversationalists are quite rare nowadays... Fortunately I'm here to prove they still exist :gleam:
 

rav3n

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As a generality, people are good conversationalists, relative to their interests. The more narrow their interests, the less they can talk about. Socially, I'm fine chatting about whatever their interests since I'm curious about pretty much anything.
 

Jaguar

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How rare? Very. But then a good conversationalist to me is someone who is actually interested in delving deeply into a topic, rather than being "right" about a topic. They fired the one librarian at my library who was a great conversationalist because she was interested in diving deep into books. I was annoyed upon finding out she was terminated for not fitting in with the "routine robots" who know nothing except how to check out a book.
 

cascadeco

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Well I mean yes as others have said it is rare.

However I don't consider a 'good conversationalist' someone who talks about interesting things. Someone can talk about interesting things without it actually being a *conversation* - it can be a monologue where they're the only one talking. I consider a good *conversationalist* someone who has enough emotional intelligence and people reading skills to actually key in on when the other person is drifting off, or rather... who never even causes the drift to occur in the first place because they are actively also asking questions, redirecting, keeping the other person engaged as well. Good conversation is an actual back and forth and it can take a lot of proactive engaging to keep things going.
 

Lark

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This is one of those things I'm going to commit to when I'm independently wealthy
 

Mole

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Altough Typology Central is driven by conversation, we stutter and gag and stop.

In part this is a class issue. The lower class are threatened by good conversation so derail it through vulgarity, passive aggressive humour, insults, and personal attacks,

The lower class also engage in group bullying.

And they are delighted with themselves when they succeed in blocking good conversation.
 
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