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  1. #1
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    Default Is it a personal offense for someone to question your type?

    I usually try to keep OP posts general in order to not skew peoples responses but this time- Im going to answer this with my opinion here too.

    I think it is absolutely ridiculous when people act like it is WRONG for someone to DARE question their type. This is a typology website. This is a place where we are trying to understand typology. That means constantly evaluatig and reevaluation behavior and vauses for behavior to understand patterns of type. This is not a place where you get to DEMAND that people see you as a particular type and then when people DONT- get offended and act like they are doing something wrong for questioning you.

    Personally, I feel that that behavior in and of itself shows that you have a problem that you are desperatly trying to fill with validation from a typlogy system- rather than actually trying to understand yourself.

    To understand typology- peoplee need to feel free to question others. To understand what IS a type- people also need to not fear being called out when they try to determine what “isnt”. If no one is allowed to question- then typology goes from a living and constantly developing understanding to something that is dead and worn by people like a badge.

    Again. In my opinion- this is a typology website and Im just... it seems more and more lately this has become less about people trying to understand themselves and others- and more about forcing people to understand them as they want to be seen.

    Thats my opinion- and for now, Im sticking to it.
    The only kinds of fights worth fighting are those you’re going to lose, because somebody has to fight them and lose and lose and lose until someday, somebody who believes as you do wins.
    I.F. Stone

    Johari

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  2. #2
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Yeah I'm not sure because typing someone as a sensor was a way to underhandily call someone stupid back in the day. Now sometimes this is true but i can't say it is 100% of the time.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so
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  3. #3
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    Yeah I'm not sure because typing someone as a sensor was a way to underhandily call someone stupid back in the day. Now sometimes this is true but i can't say it is 100% of the time.
    I think calling someone a type as a way to insult them is wrong. But I think if someone is willing to sit there and provide reasoning for why you DONT fit a type, serious well thought out reasoning, and then someone gets offended and that sort of thing is then seen as bullying or something- thats not right.

    I havent been here super long but- things have definitely changed when it comes to this. When I joined people were openly able to question others types. It was something that just happened, and although sometimes it sucked to feel like the rug was being pulled out from under you... no one acted like it was the end of the world for them. People took in information- ALL infromation- and not just demanded the informaion that they wanted to hear.

    Its only been the last year- year and a half really that ive seen this change. Seen people actually call questioning someones type-“bullying”. Its not bullying for someone to question you. Its not bullying for someone to suggest you might be wrong. You dont have to lisren to it I guess- but really- acting like its something thats some sort of intentional personal offense is limiting the understanding people are allowed to have when it comes to typology.
    The only kinds of fights worth fighting are those you’re going to lose, because somebody has to fight them and lose and lose and lose until someday, somebody who believes as you do wins.
    I.F. Stone

    Johari

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  4. #4
    Senior Member prplchknz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frosty View Post
    I think calling someone a type as a way to insult them is wrong. But I think if someone is willing to sit there and provide reasoning for why you DONT fit a type, serious well thought out reasoning, and then someone gets offended and that sort of thing is then seen as bullying or something- thats not right.

    I havent been here super long but- things have definitely changed when it comes to this. When I joined people were openly able to question others types. It was something that just happened, and although sometimes it sucked to feel like the rug was being pulled out from under you... no one acted like it was the end of the world for them. People took in information- ALL infromation- and not just demanded the informaion that they wanted to hear.

    Its only been the last year- year and a half really that ive seen this change. Seen people actually call questioning someones type-“bullying”. Its not bullying for someone to question you. Its not bullying for someone to suggest you might be wrong. You dont have to lisren to it I guess- but really- acting like its something thats some sort of intentional personal offense is limiting the understanding people are allowed to have when it comes to typology.
    yeah this happens a cycle, for awhile people are like you're blah blah and here's why and the other person is like ok let me reflect on that i politely disagree then other times it's like you are blah blah and the other person is WAAAHHH NO I"M NOT STOP BEING MEAN TO ME!!!! I've been guilty of both. but it comes and goes.
    In no likes experiment.

    that is all

    i dunno what else to say so

  5. #5
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    Jag: I prefer vanilla ice cream over chocolate.
    Betty: YOU KNOW YOU REALLY PREFER CHOCOLATE. ADMIT IT.

    What did Betty accomplish other than make a few people wonder if she's a wacko?
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  6. #6
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prplchknz View Post
    yeah this happens a cycle, for awhile people are like you're blah blah and here's why and the other person is like ok let me reflect on that i politely disagree then other times it's like you are blah blah and the other person is WAAAHHH NO I"M NOT STOP BEING MEAN TO ME!!!! I've been guilty of both. but it comes and goes.
    To me it seems like we see less of the first and more of the second now.

    When your type is being questioned it used to be youd come back in and start explaining other factors that can cause differences in presentation, talk about different functions, the influence of things like health factors and maturity, or simply thank the person and tell them politely that you still think you are “this type” but you thank them for sharing their opinion. So basically, where back in the day this would lead to further discussion and improved understanding of type- today its actually seen as “bullying” by lots of people
    The only kinds of fights worth fighting are those you’re going to lose, because somebody has to fight them and lose and lose and lose until someday, somebody who believes as you do wins.
    I.F. Stone

    Johari

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  7. #7
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaguar View Post
    Jag: I prefer vanilla ice cream over chocolate.
    Betty: YOU KNOW YOU REALLY PREFER CHOCOLATE. ADMIT IT.

    What did Betty accomplish other than make a few people wonder if she's a wacko?
    Thats not really what Im saying and kinda goes back to prpl saying that it kind of sucks when people use type in a personal way to sort of make tjemselves feel better. When people are actually calling people sensors just because they dont like them- ect.

    But should all of this be not allowed just because some people are stupid or have some sort of personal need to force someone else into a different box- I dont think so. That would be like someone going- you know, I think I have autism because sometimes I cant make eye contact- and then no one else being allowed to offer their personal opinion on it/tell them they might be wrong or their understanding of the condition might be off.

    This is a site that was designed for typological discussion and there is less and less of that now I think because people ARE more afraid of the social consequences of doing it.
    The only kinds of fights worth fighting are those you’re going to lose, because somebody has to fight them and lose and lose and lose until someday, somebody who believes as you do wins.
    I.F. Stone

    Johari

    Nohari

  8. #8
    Senior Member j.c.t.'s Avatar
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    Default

    No.
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  9. #9
    Senior Member Frosty's Avatar
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    For example- when I first joined here I typed as INTP because I had this need, that I now recognize, to understand exactly why I never felt like “fit in” with female culture. I wasnt bubbly, I wasnt into makeup, I never cared for dolls and I related a lot to what I understood Ti/Ne to be at the time. People immediately started telling me I didnt seem very Ti. Everyone questioned my type. It kinda sucked a little bit because I really thought that I fit INTP to a tee when I came on here.

    Eventually, this caused me to look around and try to understand why there was such a difference between how I perceived myself, how others perceived me, how I perceived typology, and how I really typed. It took a while but eventually I came around to the understanding that what I thought was me being a T type- was actually just that I wasnt an Fe type. It caused me to understand myself better as a person because I was willing to throw away a label that had served mostly just to make me feel better (even if it wasnt something that was conscious)

    Had no one questioned my type I might still type myself as INTP. And maybe thats fine- but I am very happy that people DID question me- even if I didnt like it at the time- because it allowed me to step away from away from a label I was using as a shield and instead understand who I really was. It allowed me to fit a type to understand myself- instead of alter myself or answer questions, because of a cognitive bias, that turned me into someone who was desperate to fit a description to me.

    -I see similar things from people on here all the time. New members who come on and demand that others see them as XNXX type- and then get upset when people offer solid reasons as why their perception of that individual is different. It means that, from what Ive seen, that person just gets more desperate to PROVE that they are a certain type- more distressed if you can believe it because they get SO defensive and offended that they start seeing people who DONT see them as that type as some sort of enemy. This forum isnt about people changing their perception of you just because you demand it- its about psychology and understanding DIFFERENT PERSPECTIVES. And lately- I think thats something thats started to die.

    Anyway. Thats my opinion- Ill leave this thread to everyone else for now- because I think Ive been pretty open at this point about my own thoughts
    The only kinds of fights worth fighting are those you’re going to lose, because somebody has to fight them and lose and lose and lose until someday, somebody who believes as you do wins.
    I.F. Stone

    Johari

    Nohari
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  10. #10

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    The line should be drawn with intent in mind. Are people weaponizing typology or are they simply providing their honest opinions. Unfortunately, the mod staff can't read minds so intent would be difficult to moderate for. One teller for intent might be context where someone pulls out typology as a shaming device out of context of a 'type me' thread.

    Eg. Someone claiming the following, in the middle of a political debate.

    You're obviously a sensor because you're too stupid to be an iNtuitive.

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